Update on My Father

sal314
sal314 Member Posts: 599 Member
edited March 2014 in Esophageal Cancer #1
Hello All,

It's been awhile since I've posted about my father. And I guess that's a good thing, since few things have changed.

My father was diagnosed with stage 4 EC with liver mets back in March. He went through about 4 rounds of chemo (don't remember which ones) that shrunk his liver mets and effected lymph nodes. He then had to stop the chemo because it was destroying his bone marrow. He had new scans last Friday and met with his doctors yesterday.

The liver spots are smaller. However, there was a new one that popped up. Everything else has remained about the same. One concern that the radiologist has was that he saw a suspicious spot on his spine. But he wasn't certain what it is. My father will have a bone scan next week to determine what, if anything, it is. (I have a bad feeling about it). My father's blood counts are still very low, so the doctor wants to wait another 3 months and see if they come back up. He then thought they might be able to try Taxol. Though it all depends on what they find on the bone scan and whether or not his counts are good enough.

They are seeing their "alternative" doctor next week to get her opinion on whether or not they should seek a second opinion. The "alternative" doctor has contacts with MD Anderson, Cleveland Clinic and Mayo. So, they will probably go to one of those centers if the doctor recommends it and thinks they can offer more help than their current doctors.

My father is feeling in his words "better than he ever has". He is having no trouble eating or swallowing (a total blessings, being it's been 6 months since he was diagnosed). His weight is steady and he's consuming mega amounts of protein to get it steady. He's back to walking and playing on the golf course.

I think it's just amazing that he hasn't had a rapid decline as of yet. I know there will come a day when things turn for the worse. I'm just thankful he's feeling good and still able eat, work and golf. I think he is still somewhat in denial about his situation (and I would be too, if I felt so good) and hasn't or won't get his "business" in order. That upsets me because I don't think it's far to my mother to not "plan" for the inevitable. But until he's willing to go there, what can one do but hope and pray he comes around. And sooner rather than later.

Please continue to pray for all of us. Especially for my parents to accept Christ as their personal savior. And for me to have peace and patience as I have to just sit back and watch this unpleasant story unfold.

Blessings,
Sally

Comments

  • paul61
    paul61 Member Posts: 1,391 Member
    #2
    I hope your dad continues to feel well
    Sally,

    I am sorry your dad had to stop chemo before it had achieved the objectives that he had set with his oncologist. I am glad he is feeling well. As a cancer survivor I can tell you each day of feeling well is a gift.

    I think your dad is probably not anxious to “get his business in order” because it may feel a bit like giving in to the “inevitable”. We all know we have to hope for the best and prepare for the worst. But preparing for the worst is always difficult. It almost feels like giving up.

    I will be praying that your dad continues to have days that he feels well enough to enjoy golf and the other things he loves. Hoping the “suspicious spot on his spine” is nothing serious.

    Best Regards,

    Paul Adams
    McCormick, South Carolina

    DX 10/22/2009 T2N1M0 – Stage IIB
    12/03/2009 Ivor Lewis
    2/8 – 6/14/2010 Adjuvant Chemo Cisplatin, Epirubicin, 5 FU
    6/21/2010 CT Scan NED
  • sandy1943
    sandy1943 Member Posts: 824
    #3
    I'm sorry he had to stop
    I'm sorry he had to stop chemo. That is always a setback. Everyone handles things differently. It will be three years in Nov. I was diagnosed.I'm Now disease free. One of the first things I did was to set my affairs in order. I didn't want anyone to wonder what I wanted. I need to redo a lot of things. My mind has changed and some things are outdated.
    When I started my journey, it was with Jesus by my side. He gave me the comfort I so needed. Because of my faith I can't even imagine going thru the trials of life without the Lord. I will join you in praying for your parents to accept the gift the Lord offers so freely.
    SAndra
  • JimsBrother
    JimsBrother Member Posts: 94
    #4
    Golf is great
    If your dad is feeling well enough to play a round of golf, then he is doing very well. As for getting his affairs in order, from your own words it is pretty clear your dad did a great job raising you. So I will assume he is a very smart reasonable man. If he is in denial now, then at some point he will come around and get everythng he needs to in order. Give him time, he will do what he needs to do, but it will probably be on his schedule.

    It may just be that in his mind it is giving in, and he isn't at all ready to do that. Be as patient and as understanding as you can. He will not let you or your mom down.

    Rob
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    #5
    This comment has been removed by the Moderator
  • Tina Blondek
    Tina Blondek Member Posts: 1,500 Member
    #6
    Hello SallyThanks for your
    Hello Sally
    Thanks for your recent dad update! I was happy to read that he is feeling so well, and able to walk and play golf! Then...I was sad to read that he has not accepted Jesus Christ as his Saviour. This is a hard thing to face and to accomplish at his stage of his life. But....it is never too late! My dad sat on the fence of religion his whole life. His last 16 mos of his life he was battling ec, within these 16 months I ministered to him and he responded. He became very spiritual and faithful. He accepted Jesus Christ as his saviour on Christms Eve 2009. He passed away on March 9, 2010. We are comfortable in knowing that he is now spending eternity in the Kingdom of God, and we will see him again!Just keep praying about it, it will happen all in good time. I agree with Sherri, your mom needs to communicate all of her feelings to your dad. His things do need to all be put in order. Sooner is better than later. Keep your chin up. Keep in touch.
    Tina
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    #7
    This comment has been removed by the Moderator
  • sal314
    sal314 Member Posts: 599 Member
    #8
    Tina Blondek said:

    Hello SallyThanks for your
    Hello Sally
    Thanks for your recent dad update! I was happy to read that he is feeling so well, and able to walk and play golf! Then...I was sad to read that he has not accepted Jesus Christ as his Saviour. This is a hard thing to face and to accomplish at his stage of his life. But....it is never too late! My dad sat on the fence of religion his whole life. His last 16 mos of his life he was battling ec, within these 16 months I ministered to him and he responded. He became very spiritual and faithful. He accepted Jesus Christ as his saviour on Christms Eve 2009. He passed away on March 9, 2010. We are comfortable in knowing that he is now spending eternity in the Kingdom of God, and we will see him again!Just keep praying about it, it will happen all in good time. I agree with Sherri, your mom needs to communicate all of her feelings to your dad. His things do need to all be put in order. Sooner is better than later. Keep your chin up. Keep in touch.
    Tina

    Thanks Tina!
    The story of your father gives me hope! I've been praying for my dad for the past 20 years (as long as I've been a believer) and sometimes I feel like it's all in vain. The thing that bothers me is the fact that he has come to church with me on Christmas Eve for the past 18 years and has heard the message of salvation as clear as it can be told, but has yet to respond! I try to witness to him, but it's really difficult being he's a very smart man (he's a lawyer) and I'm not all that great with witnessing! LOL. Added to the fact that we don't have that close of a realtionship with one another, it's just plain hard.

    Anyway, I just keep praying that God would put other people in his life that would witness to him and talk to him about spiritual things. And that God would just give me whispers of guidence and words to say to him when we're together. I would be much more at peace if I knew I'd see him again in heaven some day. The thought of not having that hope is just way too scary and painful!

    Thank you for your prayers. I'll definately keep you posted on his situation.

    Blessings,
    Sally
  • sal314
    sal314 Member Posts: 599 Member
    #9
    unknown said:

    This comment has been removed by the Moderator

    I KNOW William!!
    Believe me, I've gone around and around with them on this one! For some stupid reasoning, they feel they have to follow their current doctors "protocal". He gets his blood count checked every week, but his counts are still so low, they just dont' want to or "can't" give him anymore chemo at the moment.

    I talked to them about the Therespheres and asked if they talked to the doctor about it to keep the liver mets under control. My mother told me the doctor didn't want to try that just yet, he thought Taxol would be a better option when (and if) his blood counts get good again. My thought??? I'm like "crap, that makes no sense"! You're just gonna let months go by and give the liver mets more time to grow and multiply! AND...you're not even sure IF he'll be able to take anymore chemo! It just sounds CRAZY to me! If I were them, I would be on the phone making an appointment with the Theraspheres people pronto!!

    As for the "alternative" doctor, I must say she is amazing. She is an MD and holds 3 other PhD's. She is sent patients that other doctors from Mayo, Cleveland Clinic and MD Anderson when they don't know what else to do with them. She obviously isn't a miracle worker, but has helped MANY feel better and slow their cancers down. I trust her judgement and thoughts more than the oncologist at this point.

    ANyway, in my parents eyes, I'm the young daughter who knows nothing. They know everything. They will do what they want to do. Both my parents are very intelligent, successful people (in the world's eyes) and believe in their way or no way. So...what can I do, but keep asking them questions about whether or not they're doing this or that. And praying!

    It's extremely frustrating, but ultimately, it is their choice to handle the situation the way they want to. It's just certainly NOT the way I would! As for coming to know Jesus, well, I'll keep praying for them to open their hearts!

    Thank you for your continued prayers!

    Blessings,
    Sally

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