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Scared!

Cindi71's picture
Cindi71
Posts: 2
Joined: Jun 2010

My husband was just diagnoised with lung cancer stage 4. I has spread to his brain and adreanal gland. We just finished 3 weeks of radiation and will find out in a few days when chemo will start. The radiation has taken such a tole on my husbands energy. He has lost a lot of weight and looks so different from just a month ago. He was told he has under a year but we're determined to make it longer. We still have two children at home, 15 and 12 years old and we recently moved about 6 months ago from Florida to New Hampshire (a childhood dream of my husband). All our family live in Florida so my children and myself feel so alone in this. I'm trying to stay strong but it is so hard to see him going throught this pain and there's nothing I can do. Sorry, just need to vent!

zinniemay's picture
zinniemay
Posts: 534
Joined: Mar 2009

Cindi,
My husband had E.C. Cancer last year, it spread to his lungs, They gave him less than a year. We have two children (adults). I know there is no easy way to tell you that each day we try to take it as it comes. My husband is on his second round of chemo this time. He had 7 weeks of chemo and radaition last year. This time it is knocking him down. He still is trying to do everything he can. I canme to Michigan as a kid, My husband came to Michigan after we meet, we got married and have lived here ever since. But our families live in Wi and Ar. So we do not have the home base support system here. There are so many people on here that can help you understand and show you that you are not alone. They can tell you where to seek help. I an just learning the ins and outs, but if you need to chat. I will be there for you.
Zenniemay (Jennie is my name)

Cindi71's picture
Cindi71
Posts: 2
Joined: Jun 2010

Thanks Jennie! We take each day as it comes and pray for the best. This has been hard on our kids and we hope to find a support group. We did find one at the local hospital but nothing for kids. I'm hoping some of the adults there will have children of their own my children can relate to. We have 7 children ages 23 down to 12 and one grandchild in Puerto Rico. We did find out our oldest son and his fiance are expecting in February so we're looking forward to that.

zinniemay's picture
zinniemay
Posts: 534
Joined: Mar 2009

Cindi, I think if doctors realy knew for sure they would say a day a month a minute they guess, when they are asked. My husband has tumors on both lungs, he had E.C. in 2009 since it spread to the Lungs it is still concided throat cancer. I believe we can not set a watch to it, that we have to take each day and trust be there are some bad days. We have two adult children no grandchildren or children in laws.
I think it is harder for you because you have younger children , and then I think they keep you busy and at times can take your mind off all the bad things. So who knows? I cry and then I wipe the tears and cry again. There are moments that I can not stop myself, then there are moments when it seams so dark and lonely and I think what am I doing he is here now just love him and do the best I can for him. So I am trying to find a place in the middle where I can center myself, so I can be my best for him.
I don't go to church but if you do that might be a place to start? If you can't find a group maybe you could start one? I am sure there is people close by that are in this ship we are on that would come or you could go to.
If you need to chat I am here if you need to vent I am here. or you can email me
woody@I2k.com

Glenna M's picture
Glenna M
Posts: 1576
Joined: May 2009

Hi Cindi, I'm sorry to hear about your husband but I want to tell you that there are many people here who have been told they only had months or a year left and they are still here 5 years (some more) later. Where is your husband being treated - Dartmouth or Concord??

I was born and raised in New Hampshire and my husband and I moved to Florida in 1995, we enjoyed it very much but missed our families who are all in New England so we moved back in 2000. I was diagnosed in May of '09 with NSCLC in my left lung and two weeks later they found out I also have SCC of the larynx. I received my chemo and radiation for the larynx at the Payson Center in Concord and Stereotactic Radiosurgery for my lung at Wentworth Douglas in Dover.

Please don't go by what the doctor said about his having a year - read some of the posts here and you will find many long term survivors of stage 4 lung cancer. Don't give up hope!!

Please post again and let us know how you, your husband and family are doing. We are all here for you whenever you need us. Whether it is for advice, encouragement or you just need to vent. We have all been there and understand.

I wish there was more I could do for you and your family.

Stay strong and don't give up hope,
Glenna

KWeiser's picture
KWeiser
Posts: 16
Joined: Jul 2010

I am almost 32 years old and was diagnosed in October 2009. I have had back pain for years but started having leg pain so surgery was done, nothing like a fusion or anything, just shaving of the bulging discs. The pain in my leg did not go away and was getting worse. Further test showed a tumor on my right hip. Immediately I was sent to the oncologist and soon found that cancer was in the lining of my lungs, kidney, and liver. I had a rod put in my right leg and was on crutches from the minute they saw the tumor until about 2 months after the surgery. I had radiation to that leg. I then had chemo, Carboplatin and Taxol. I had 8 or 10 treatments but the chemo was only keeping the tumors stable - they were either shrinking or growing by .1 or .2 centimeters. I then had a consult for a trial, but my oncologist at home and the trial doctors suggested I try another kind of chemo first. In order to get a different chemo my diagnosis had to be changed. I was told I technically have adenocarcinoma of unknown primary but my diagnosis on paper is now lung cancer so that I can have Alimta for my chemo. Recently the cancer has spread to my other hip and my lower back. I had more radiation and have had 2 treatments with the new chemo. I have had very few symptoms from either of the chemos, so I consider my self very blessed. Is your mom able to get other opinions or go to any of the well known cancer centers across the United States? How is she handling the diagnosis? This is the first "chat" or whatever that I have ever done; just joined a moment ago. If you would like to chat through email my address is kmcantrell55@gmail.com

A great form of support and way to vent is through the website Caringbridge.org
The support has been fantastic, inspirational to myself as well as to others. I have to admit that I procrastinate and don't post messages to it as often as I should but I know it's there whenever I need it and it's a great way to keep people updated with what's going on with me. You can check my site out at caringbridge.org/visit/kellycantrellweiser

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