Is it okay to tell others my mother has brain cancer?

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mafaldas
mafaldas Member Posts: 21
edited March 2014 in Caregivers #1
So, I have decided to give up on the idea of doing an internship this summer because:
1) I want to be available for my mom, who I will get to see in late June and then again in mid-August.
2) I am having heart surgery.

These past few days when graduate school colleagues have asked about my summer plans, I have finally found the courage to talk about my mom's brain cancer, to explain why I will not be doing an internship. (I am possibly the only student who will not have an internship.) I am glad I am explaining to others the situation (without going into too much detail), since it fills in the blanks that otherwise the rumor mill might fill in for me. (I am, however, keeping mum about my heart surgery.)

But, I am not sure if this is the right strategy. Am I being foolish by sharing with others that my has brain cancer and that this has made it challenging for me to keep up with my studies and to hold a summer internship? I would love to hear other caregivers' opinions.

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  • grandmafay
    grandmafay Member Posts: 1,633 Member
    #2
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    Talking
    Talking to others about your mom serves a couple of purposes. First, you are right about the rumor mill. When people don't know an answer, they often make one up to fill the void. Also, I am sure that it helps you to talk to others about your concern for your mom. I think most perspective employers will respect your decision not to take an internship when you know that your plans might have to change. It is also important that you take care of yourself. I hope your heart surgery goes well. I know this has been a difficult decision for you. Timing can be so tricky at times. Things would be different if we were in charge of the world, but we're not. On second thought, I wouldn't want that job. Best of luck this summer. I am sire you have made the right decision for you and your mom. Remember, when we do the best we can at the time, that's all that we can expect of ourselves. Fay
  • Tina Blondek
    Tina Blondek Member Posts: 1,500 Member
    #3
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    You Have Made the Right Decision
    Hi Mafaldas
    Do not worry, I believe that you have made the right decision. You are your own person, you make your own decisions. You have explained enough concerning your mom. That is all the others need to know. It is your business, not theirs! School will always be there for you, you will get back to it sooner or later. Top priorities right now are your mom and yourself. You will be having heart surgery this summer, you must prepare yourself for that.
    Best of luck to you. Let us know how you are both doing. Peace.
    Tina

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