My Heart Aches Everytime I Hear About A New Cancer Patient

contrail said:

Compassion!
I think you have great compassion. You're not being over sensitive. Having gone through your fight with the beast, you're heart goes out to those who are now dealing with it. When we are told that we have cancer, we enter into a whole new world, one that none of us wants to be apart of, but here we are. I think when we hear of someone else who is now part of this world, we do ache for them. That's why I'm so glad we have this sight where we can come and be there for each other, and help each other through our fears, our triumphs, our ups and our downs. Our sisters here, know what it's all about, and here is where we can find true compassion and understanding.

I've been cancer free now for a year and four months, and I'm thankful for each new day. I love to come to this sight and read what is being discussed. I don't write very often, but your thread really struck me, and I just want you to know it's women like you that we need to hear from. Thanks! Connie

I get what your feeling. I
I get what your feeling. I am also going to guess that this is normal. I just had my one year this April 15th.

Ur sweet
I work in surgery and when we do a breast biopsy I hope for the best. Most times they come back for a mastectomy. I had a right side mast. I talk w them for a while before they go to sleep. Try to comfort. Alot of the time they smile, shed a tear and go to sleep. Later, sometimes I see them at chemo. I'm still recieving herceptin. We talk and laugh. Alot of strong women out there. Like you, just hate seeing more added to the list of warriors. Gotta keep fighting and supporting the " troops". Gotta be positive for the "new" ones coming aboard. Ur not being over sensitive, it's called empathy, not sympathy. Love to you, Katz

me too
When I was diagnosed I came to realize that no one can really understand what it is like to be diagnosed until/unless it happens to them. Until it happens to you---you just don't "get it". That's not a slam to others, just an acknowledgement that it's impossible to imagine what you don't personally know. So, yes, I do feel a sense of sadness and empathy when I hear of someone with a new diagnosis. Some days I can reach out to them and some days I just can't. I don't know what time will do to that feeling. I essentially became cancer-free with my bilat mastectomy (12/15/2009) because I needed no further treatment (yes, I have been incredibly blessed). The emotions are still so close, time will tell if this changes.

Hugs, El

New Flower said:

yes it is very true
Every new cancer patient story makes me sad. Every time when I read about NED I feel proud and happy that so many of us have won this fight and move to a healthy happy life after cancer.
New Flower

and it seems we hear about someone every day...
I agree with your statement 100%. My heart aches for the young women who have to go through everything I just completed (well, 3 more days of radiation) and hope and pray someone finds a cure soon! They found a way for people with AIDS to live long productive lives, I figured cancer was right behind! It doesn't make sense to me. All the money and time invested and they can't find anything better than what MY onc used 18 years ago???

Cindy Ann said:

Thank You All For Just being You!!
I am newly diagnosed 2 weeks ago today I saw the doctor and found out. I haven't even been through surgery yet. But I have been truly blessed by all the women on this site. Who just get me. No judgements. No do as I say advice. You just get me.I have challenges every day to get through. But this site and you all make them bearable. I have written with tears streaming down my face and got a reply from a person who didn't even know me knew what to say to stop the tears from flowing. Because of you ladies and your knowledge, your warmth, unending empathy I am making it day by day through this. Somedays minute by minute. I know on those days (everyday) I can log in and read soemthing or ask a question or just pour my heart out as some of you have already read and not be judged. I feel nothing but love here. I have a great husband and kids.But there are times you just cannot tell them how much it hurts or how scared you really are. My friends are now avoiding me. I got the reason from this site. I promise to never avoid a person in my place ever. I also want you all to know daily you make me stronger,more compassionate, and a better person. Thank you Scotch Freckles for opening this discussion and allowing me to express my graditude.

Thank You all,
Cindy Ann

Heart Aches Too
My heart also goes out to those newbies I read about on the board. It seems like there is hardly a day that goes by that there isn't a new member or two of our club. I'm a little over two years out from my dx and I still feel like I have post traumatic stress syndrome at times! And I also am disappointed at the fact that for all the money and research over the years, we are still not further along in the hope for a cure so that no one else has to come to this board. This board is so full of encouragement and love reaching out to others that I'm constantly amazed. Y'all are awesome!!!!

Scotch Freckles said:

How are you doing
Hi Cindy Ann,

It has been a couple of weeks since your comment and diagnosis, how are you doing? Have you been through surgery yet? Any questions or need to chat? We are all still here.

Scotch Freckles

In Limbo
Hello Scotch Freckles, I am actually half Irish with freckles across my nose still. LOL!! Surgery stopped until BRACA Analysis comes back. Had it done last week. But my insurance co is fighting(of course) and Myriad is working with my doc to get me in a trial. My daughter tested positve for variance. Her dad and I could of passed it on to her or just me??So they are holding my blood until they figure it out. My surgeon and the ordering doc agree 1 mth longer will not cause me anymore damage.( just my nerves and stress levels) But just having a lumpectomy and radiation if my Braca is positive is a whole new game. Changes everything. So I wait in limbo. I am very stressed and scared. Sad but am seeing a therapist to work through that. Afraid what the test will say and afraid if I didn't do the test.Just awful place to be. But for me after my daughter not doing BRACA is like putting the cart before the horse. So pray for me it is negative. Nothing you want to pass on to your grandchildren. They will because of my daughter all have to be tested at 18. Boys and girls. So it's been a hoot. It also has been a time where I had to stop thinking of me and think of my daughter and my husband 1st. Sometimes during this fight we have to stop thinkling of us and look at the loved ones around us..Well you got a page full!!

Thank for you caring!!!I have just been quiet. Withdrawn into myself for courage..Lost a few friends of late(ouch) and just needed to soldier up..

Cindy Ann

BethInAz said:

Losing Friends
Cindy Ann, I'm so sorry for your losses. I read your earlier post and was touched by your words of gratitude. Thank you Scotch Freckles for starting this thread for people like Cindy Ann - and me! For sure, I also feel touched every time I hear of another cancer diagnosis but I have to believe that this is why I've gone through this journey - to be a support to others and to be able to minister to them with the comfort I've received from others as I've walked this path.
It's just beyond words how I feel about your friends not talking with you anymore, Cindy Ann. It's a shame that they can't understand what you're going through. Then, none of us would have understood what we're going through just a few months ago! What a learning curve we've been through and it continues on. My guess is that through this experience, you'll develop a whole new group of friends who will be richer and deeper. And you will become the type of friend that others will be drawn to because the compassion created in you through this experience will make you very attractive, indeed.
Blessings to you!
Beth

AWWWWWWWWW!!!
Beth, You made me cry. Good tears. Not the bad ones.. I needed that. Thank you my new friend!Thank you to all my new friends. Never had so many in my life until this site. Also realized what it means to be a friend. I thought I knew what true friendship was. Unfortunately got a lesson as have many have in what true friends I really had and now have.. Always learning..

Hugs and Blessings,
Cindy Ann

Hubby said:

Bumping this up
With all of the newbies (and a lot of young newbies) and reccurences lately and what I am going through with my wife, I just felt a need to bump up this thread.

I did ask Donna what date she considered her cancerversary, and she said (the same as I did) the diagnosis date: April 1st. I told her I was still waiting for her to say April Fools!! and she said she is still waiting for someone to say it too; and we did have a good laugh over it.

Bob

I feel the same...
Whenever I see a new post on here and read about their feelings and fears my heart drops a few more inches. I just hope this site helps each of you as much as it has helped me. So nice to have a place to go and feel like you're with a group that truly KNOWS what you're going through!