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when will this nightmare end

lcarper2
Posts: 638
Joined: Dec 2009

sorry everyone but I need to vent I am doing well with chemo get great reports from my onc every three weeks and life was good until today and my husband was told he has bladder cancer he will have surgery on Feb 1st. I don't know how much more I can handle we are supposed to avoid stress well I'd like for some one to give a prescription for a stress free life. Any way sorry but I needed to get this off my chest please pray for us we need it...

tootsie1's picture
tootsie1
Posts: 5056
Joined: Feb 2008

I'm so very sorry. It really doesn't seem fair that you have to go through all this. I will certainly pray for you and your husband. Do you have family nearby that can help you while all this is going on?

*hugs*
Gail

lcarper2
Posts: 638
Joined: Dec 2009

no we don't have anyone close to us except his daughter and she is a basket case so I don't need 2 to take care of I have my hands full...

dianetavegia's picture
dianetavegia
Posts: 1953
Joined: Mar 2009

I will be praying for y'all! Does your husband know yet how his cancer will be treated? My grandfather died of bladder cancer 50 years ago, before treatment was available, but a good friend at church had bladder cancer last year, the bad area was removed and she's doing great. No chemo, even!

Let's just pray he's caught this early and with all the new treatments that he'll be cured.

Diane

lcarper2
Posts: 638
Joined: Dec 2009

they said they would remove the polop and that is all we know now thanks for your prayers

Kathleen808's picture
Kathleen808
Posts: 2361
Joined: Jan 2009

That is too much. So sorry to hear this. We have 2 friends who had bladder cancer 3 years and 5 years ago and both are NED and fine, no problems at all. I have said a prayer for both of you. I'm praying you get a break.

Aloha,
Kathleen

lcarper2
Posts: 638
Joined: Dec 2009

we will get through this like he got me through my cancer together and know everything will be ok thank you

TLG320
Posts: 168
Joined: Oct 2009

You and your husband are certainly in my prayers. I know two people who've had bladder cancer and both have beaten it. I truly hope that it's a very early stage that requires little (or better yet, NO) treatment beyond surgery.

Hang in there. You've got a lot of people praying for you and sending healing wishes,

Hugs and hope,
Tashina

lcarper2
Posts: 638
Joined: Dec 2009

thank you so much this site has been like a prescription to me.

Buzzard's picture
Buzzard
Posts: 3073
Joined: Aug 2008

Bladder cancer has stricken 2 of my friends and they are doing fine now...The only problem that they are having is a little bit of incontinence (not able to hold urine real well) but not to worry, depends will take care of that until recovery is complete.

OK Now for the stress relief part.
Do not take this as an overwhelming fear. You are in complete control here. What you have to do is simply understand that the only thing you can control about this is yourself, and to control yourself means having the ability to control the situation you are in...

Take a notepad and write down the steps in which you and him will be taking and it becomes another part of the daily routine. I know, I know, it is easier said than done, but its something that you will have to get through so you need to make it as easy a journey as possible. First off, have a family meeting, with the daughter there as well, and let all of them know what your itinerary through this will be and that there will be no pessimistic attitudes through this whole ordeal. Its gotta be dealt with chin up, head strong, straight forward mentality...and I know that you by speaking to you have the attitude to take control of this situation as well as the last one. It is a major blow to a family, I can only imagine what it feels like to you right now, but now the both of you are patients and caregivers as well, the daughter is nutso because all she sees is losing both parents, the word cancer has a way of denoting "instant death" which is not anywhere near that anymore due to the medical field and its patient knowledge. I can understand why the daughter feels this way, and I didn't mean that she is "nutso", its just a simple term for me that I use meaning "lost as last years easter egg"...don't take it personal..

This is where you will shine as a patient, caregiver, mom, and human being. As much as I dislike saying this I will " When the crap hits the fan, its usually the woman that makes it ok"......I know you can do it also....let us know what you need....Love and Hope, Clift

lcarper2
Posts: 638
Joined: Dec 2009

I am so relaxed after reading your post and yes you are right and I hate to admit that any man is right LOL but you are I will do as you have suggested and know GOD is in control and this to shal pass.

HollyID's picture
HollyID
Posts: 951
Joined: Dec 2009

I can't even imagine what you're both feeling at this time. I don't have anything to add... Just wanted you to know prayers are going out for you here, too.

lcarper2
Posts: 638
Joined: Dec 2009

for the prayers and good vibes

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