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Losing weight

aunti_m's picture
Posts: 42
Joined: Oct 2009

It's been a while since I've posted. My husband was taken off chemo (EOX) Oct 5 after enduring 6 rounds. He did very well on chemo but once off he began to feel very sick. He has lost 25 lbs this month. He has no problem swallowing in fact his endoscopy picture showed no visible sign of cancer. Biopsy showed cancer still in the outer layer of esophagus. He just can't stomach any food, tastes terrible, makes him gag when he trys to eat anything. He's on Nexium, Mirtazapine, Effexor and Megastrol. We had a dr. appt. yesturday and found out his CEA tumor marker had sky rocketed to 1000 after steadily dropping throughout chemo. At one point he was down to a mark of 15. I try not to worry but the doctors said if the cancer is progressing that fast that may be the reason for his not eating. He has come so far and was responding so well to the chemo, it's so hard to watch him feel so miserable, to not see his beautiful smile. I miss my husband and our kids miss their dad. I can't bare the thought of this house without him. The saddness in our children. They are so young to have to go through this. We have been so lucky to have such a wonderful marriage and such great kids.
Sorry, just feeling really sad today.

Donna70's picture
Posts: 921
Joined: Aug 2009

So sorry about your situation. It is heartbreaking. When you have young children it is so different from us older folks who have lived longer lives, I will pray for you and your husband and family. Maybe just trying to do that one step at a time, one day and cherish this time with him, but sure wish someone could make him more comfortable and able to get something down and feel better. I can't imagine how much energy he has lost thru all that weight loss in one month. Sorry I can't do anything but pray and offer a big internet hug to you. Hope you have a good support system to help you. take care,

Posts: 164
Joined: Aug 2009

I'm really sorry about your husband and how it is affecting you and your young children. I am praying for him, and praying that the Dr.'s can find something that will help him be able to eat and get his strength back - as well as getting rid of his cancer. It's really hard to see loved ones so sick.
Prayers & Hugs,

Posts: 70
Joined: Nov 2009

I understand. We have 3 school age children who are great kids. I am always saying "life is not fair", but having a parent with cancer is REALLY not fair. We have tried to keep their lives a normal as possible, but the reality is that they have seen things and had to do things no child should have to, not to mention what they have missed out on. At one point I acctually thought MD Anderson would be a great place to spend Spring break. What I have found is that my bad days, turn into their bad days, they really do take their cues from us. Can you get them out of the house, a movie or something to get their minds off their dad, at least for a couple of hours? I have also found that having a friend over to our house also helped, it was a little bit of normal for the kids.

I am sorry your husband is not feeling well and pray it gets better.


mumphy's picture
Posts: 486
Joined: Jun 2009

It's o.k to feel sad, it's normal to feel sad. I would be surprised if you weren't.
I think mae has a good idea. They need be with you and to have a little fun just to get there minds off of thing too.

Hope this helps a little,


Posts: 252
Joined: Mar 2009

You wouldn't be normal if you weren't sad. IT's very hard to watch your loved one suffer. I'm having to watch my dad go down hill now and it's hard. My dad is 70 and I don't live with him, but I feel like part of me is sinking with him. It is so unfair for your children. Just try to keep your faith. I keep telling myself the same thing. I do think it's a good idea to try to do some fun stuff with them this time of year. We found out last Christmas about my dad, and it was just ruined. I felt like that small child. The sadness was over whelming and I refused to listen to Christmas music. I'm rambling sorry, I'm having a bit of a sad day too. I will continue to pray for your husband and your family. This is such a magical time of the year, so we all still have hope for that wonderful miracle.

Hang in there!!! Extra prayers coming your way!!!

Tina Blondek's picture
Tina Blondek
Posts: 1566
Joined: Nov 2009

Dear Aunti,
So sorry you and your husband and family is going through this rough time. It is so very hard to see our loved ones go through this horrile battle with this beast. Yes, it is definitely ok to be sad. Please do not hold your emotions in. Find some time to be alone, like in the shower, and cry, cry, cry. Do get yourself and your kids out of the house and find something fun to do. It is the holiday season, try your best to not take that fun and excitement away for your kids. Keep your faith, think positive, and keep fighting.

Sounds like your husband may need to be admitted back into the hospital. Has he had another cat scan or pet scan done? Has the cancer spread? He may possibly need to have a feeding tube put in.

Please know that you can always come to this site for comfort and understanding. Please remember that we are all praying for you, your husband, and your family. Hope you do have a good support team, and do not be afraid to ask them for help. Keeping all of you in my heart, and in my prayers. Keep us posted, and do not stay away from here for too long!


aunti_m's picture
Posts: 42
Joined: Oct 2009

Thank you all for your kind words, advice and prayers.

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