Off remission

fuzzytrouble
fuzzytrouble Member Posts: 212
edited March 2014 in Uterine Cancer #1
Hello all, I am back from being away for a out time from cancer. Well that ended yesterday when I got the results from my ct scans. I am now on Doxil every 4 weeks for how long who knows for sure. I knew it would be back but it hit me like a Sledgehammer" like someone else said on one of the boards. You know it will come back and you think you are ready for the news, but this is not the case for me. I have cried for 2 days over this and this will be my second recurrence since 2007. They had to put something in with my chemo to calm me down today and then called a prescription for the pill form. I did not need it at all last time, but so different this time. I know all you sisters out there with the same issues, feel my pain. I just turned 59, and I just became a first time grandma with grandbaby 3,000 miles away from us. Right now it's woe is me, but soon I will calm down and accept what will be, will be. My heart goes out to you all, and we are in quite a battle.

Here's to life,
Sharon
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Comments

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  • california_artist
    california_artist Member Posts: 816 Member
    My heart just aches for you and yours.
    Sharon,

    I am so very, very sad to hear of your recurrence, I barely know what to say.
    Is there anything I could possibly do for you?

    Patricia's reply is so eloquent and says it all.

    with love and caring,

    claudia
  • daisy366
    daisy366 Member Posts: 1,458

    My heart just aches for you and yours.
    Sharon,

    I am so very, very sad to hear of your recurrence, I barely know what to say.
    Is there anything I could possibly do for you?

    Patricia's reply is so eloquent and says it all.

    with love and caring,

    claudia

    Sharon, I don't know what to say either!!!
    You are living my biggest fear!!!! I try not to think about it but know this possibility is VERY REAL and lurking below the service. Sometimes I feel guilty that I have these thoughts and I try to get rid of them as soon as they surface because I don't want to feed into them and dwell there.

    Are you dealing with UPSC?? If you don't mind sharing again what stage were you and what treatments did you have? What is happening now? If you'd rather not - it's OK.

    My prayers and healing energy are being directed to you and your family.

    Mary Ann
  • fuzzytrouble
    fuzzytrouble Member Posts: 212
    Thank you all
    I came back so I can share my dealings with doxil, which I thought was just for ovarian cancer, but I guess it's for endometrial cancer as well. If you click on my picture you can read what I have had and what I was staged. I hope that all of you that are in remission stay this way for a very long time. I will let you all know how this goes.

    Thinking of you all,
    Sharon
  • Teresa 61
    Teresa 61 Member Posts: 84 Member

    Thank you all
    I came back so I can share my dealings with doxil, which I thought was just for ovarian cancer, but I guess it's for endometrial cancer as well. If you click on my picture you can read what I have had and what I was staged. I hope that all of you that are in remission stay this way for a very long time. I will let you all know how this goes.

    Thinking of you all,
    Sharon

    Sharon
    It"s so hard to write this as I'm crying for you and at the same time feeling the grip of fear that we are all to familiar with. Will be checking our site often to see how you are doing. Special prayers are going out to you...... Teresa
  • TiggersDoBounce
    TiggersDoBounce Member Posts: 408
    Teresa 61 said:

    Sharon
    It"s so hard to write this as I'm crying for you and at the same time feeling the grip of fear that we are all to familiar with. Will be checking our site often to see how you are doing. Special prayers are going out to you...... Teresa

    Sharon,

    I am so sorry to hear of your reoccurence :( Sending thoughts and prayers your way for strength and another healing. Pray for strength as you have so much to look forward to.

    Sending a big group hug to all...seems like we can use it this week.

    Keep us posted on your progress!

    Laurie
  • kkstef
    kkstef Member Posts: 688

    Thank you all
    I came back so I can share my dealings with doxil, which I thought was just for ovarian cancer, but I guess it's for endometrial cancer as well. If you click on my picture you can read what I have had and what I was staged. I hope that all of you that are in remission stay this way for a very long time. I will let you all know how this goes.

    Thinking of you all,
    Sharon

    My Heart Hurts for you!
    Oh, Sharon! I was so sad when I read about your reoccurrence. I don't know what to say except that we are all here to support you in any way that we can. You have had an amazing journey, and I am praying this new drug will be the answer to your prayers!

    I think your message kind of smacked all of us and reminded us of the possibilities we each face. You are a brave and courageous woman and I am confident you will win this battle!!

    Love and prayers, Karen
  • shortmarge
    shortmarge Member Posts: 291
    kkstef said:

    My Heart Hurts for you!
    Oh, Sharon! I was so sad when I read about your reoccurrence. I don't know what to say except that we are all here to support you in any way that we can. You have had an amazing journey, and I am praying this new drug will be the answer to your prayers!

    I think your message kind of smacked all of us and reminded us of the possibilities we each face. You are a brave and courageous woman and I am confident you will win this battle!!

    Love and prayers, Karen

    Sharon
    My heart and prayers are with you. You are an amazing woman and I believe you can fight this. I am sending you cyber hugs and many, many prayers.

    MIND, BODY AND SOUL!

    Hugs,

    Marge
  • fuzzytrouble
    fuzzytrouble Member Posts: 212

    Sharon,

    I am so sorry to hear of your reoccurence :( Sending thoughts and prayers your way for strength and another healing. Pray for strength as you have so much to look forward to.

    Sending a big group hug to all...seems like we can use it this week.

    Keep us posted on your progress!

    Laurie

    Thank you all for your great support, I know I am safe here
    I just wanted to let you know that this site is the best with all the love that comes from once who were strangers, but not anymore. We are just like family now with all we are going through and sharing all our fears and anxiety as we pass each bump in the road. I am also a Mass. native I grew up in Cambridge and my daughter and family resides in Dedham. I wish you a smoother road, but driving in Boston is another story.

    Living it up,
    Sharon
  • lindaprocopio
    lindaprocopio Member Posts: 1,980

    Sharon
    My heart and prayers are with you. You are an amazing woman and I believe you can fight this. I am sending you cyber hugs and many, many prayers.

    MIND, BODY AND SOUL!

    Hugs,

    Marge

    ((((Sharon)))) Recurrance SUCKS. I'm soooo sorry, sweetie.
    I just got back from my 'remission celebration' trip to Greece, and am so sorry to hear your news. I have my 3-month monitoring tests coming up in November, and the anxiety is already sneaking in, for we all know that 'the beast' can come sneaking back at any time. Every swelling, every odd painful twinge, every change in bowels,...each of us in remission know the little things that can fire up the fear that we'll be diagnosed with a recurrance.

    You can do this battle again, Sharon. You are a strong warrior and I know you will knock the cancer back again into submission. But I sure am sorry that you have to start the treatments again. (((((Big big hugs)))))!
  • fuzzytrouble
    fuzzytrouble Member Posts: 212

    ((((Sharon)))) Recurrance SUCKS. I'm soooo sorry, sweetie.
    I just got back from my 'remission celebration' trip to Greece, and am so sorry to hear your news. I have my 3-month monitoring tests coming up in November, and the anxiety is already sneaking in, for we all know that 'the beast' can come sneaking back at any time. Every swelling, every odd painful twinge, every change in bowels,...each of us in remission know the little things that can fire up the fear that we'll be diagnosed with a recurrance.

    You can do this battle again, Sharon. You are a strong warrior and I know you will knock the cancer back again into submission. But I sure am sorry that you have to start the treatments again. (((((Big big hugs)))))!

    Thank you
    I know I have many ears out here and like you I also get so nervous when the scan time comes. I kind of had a feeling about this one, because I just wasn't feeling right for awhile. My body felt heavy and my ankles were swelling more than usual. I don't want to frighten anyone but please pay attention to your body more than ever. I am very depressed now and don't know if I should ask for anti-depression pills or not, will it make me worse or will they help with the feeling of this new dx? I cry at everything now and I don't even want to move to go anywhere. I would like some help with the depression bit. I am not a person of faith, I have my reasons, so please don't be upset with me for that. My husband does and I know so many of you have on this site. I know that many of you have gone past the two different times of chemo and I to will fight this with all my heart and your support, but right now it's a toughie to deal with.

    Living with great hope
  • Songflower
    Songflower Member Posts: 608

    Thank you
    I know I have many ears out here and like you I also get so nervous when the scan time comes. I kind of had a feeling about this one, because I just wasn't feeling right for awhile. My body felt heavy and my ankles were swelling more than usual. I don't want to frighten anyone but please pay attention to your body more than ever. I am very depressed now and don't know if I should ask for anti-depression pills or not, will it make me worse or will they help with the feeling of this new dx? I cry at everything now and I don't even want to move to go anywhere. I would like some help with the depression bit. I am not a person of faith, I have my reasons, so please don't be upset with me for that. My husband does and I know so many of you have on this site. I know that many of you have gone past the two different times of chemo and I to will fight this with all my heart and your support, but right now it's a toughie to deal with.

    Living with great hope

    My prayers are with you
    There is nothing wrong with asking for Anti depression medication. Cymbalta is great for some people; it also helps chronic pain. If that doesn't work there are many to try until you find one that's right for you. When I am on chemo I cry all the time. I wake up with tears in my eyes. Taking an antidepressant can help. Also, a mild tranquilizer like ativan is helpful. these medictions are there to help you so you can get some life out of each day. They were made to lighten your load during this difficult time. Don't be afraid to try them. You don't have to suffer so. My heart goes out to you and I pray for strength for you and for myself when my time comes. As we know in life, our time comes to everyone someday. Don't be afraid to get help.

    Love,
    Diane
  • Ro10
    Ro10 Member Posts: 1,561

    Thank you
    I know I have many ears out here and like you I also get so nervous when the scan time comes. I kind of had a feeling about this one, because I just wasn't feeling right for awhile. My body felt heavy and my ankles were swelling more than usual. I don't want to frighten anyone but please pay attention to your body more than ever. I am very depressed now and don't know if I should ask for anti-depression pills or not, will it make me worse or will they help with the feeling of this new dx? I cry at everything now and I don't even want to move to go anywhere. I would like some help with the depression bit. I am not a person of faith, I have my reasons, so please don't be upset with me for that. My husband does and I know so many of you have on this site. I know that many of you have gone past the two different times of chemo and I to will fight this with all my heart and your support, but right now it's a toughie to deal with.

    Living with great hope

    Sharon I am so sorry that you have to go through treatment again
    Sharon my heart aches for you. I can't imagine how you feel. I can certainly understand the depression. I think an anti depressant would help you greatly. When I was diagnosed my husband started on Paxil. He said it helped him greatly. After a while he stopped taking it. He has it on hand to start again, if he feels like he needs it. There is nothing wrong with taking the medicine you need to help you. That's why you are starting the Doxil.....to help you.

    The suggestion for an anti anxiety pill like Ativan is a good suggestion too. It will help you relax, and possibly sleep better, too.

    Sorry you have not been feeling well for a while. Remember that new granddaughter to brighten your days. I am glad you are going to fight with all your heart. That is important. In peace and caring.
  • daisy366
    daisy366 Member Posts: 1,458
    Ro10 said:

    Sharon I am so sorry that you have to go through treatment again
    Sharon my heart aches for you. I can't imagine how you feel. I can certainly understand the depression. I think an anti depressant would help you greatly. When I was diagnosed my husband started on Paxil. He said it helped him greatly. After a while he stopped taking it. He has it on hand to start again, if he feels like he needs it. There is nothing wrong with taking the medicine you need to help you. That's why you are starting the Doxil.....to help you.

    The suggestion for an anti anxiety pill like Ativan is a good suggestion too. It will help you relax, and possibly sleep better, too.

    Sorry you have not been feeling well for a while. Remember that new granddaughter to brighten your days. I am glad you are going to fight with all your heart. That is important. In peace and caring.

    Caution about benzodiazepine medication
    Ativan, xanax, klonipin, valium, librium, and others are benzodiazepines - they are sedative DEPRESSANTS. This class of drug is insidious - and personally, I think dangerous unless properly monitored by a competent professional. Take caution and research all benzodiazepines. They are meant to be taken for a VERY SHORT TIME - generally 3 months. They are addictive and when taken with alcohol can cause black-outs (being awake and not knowing what you are doing). I have personal knowledge of the danger!!!

    Doctors are prescribing these like candy and for long term with sometimes disastrous results. We have enough problems and don't need any others.

    With caring, Mary Ann
  • kumar
    kumar Member Posts: 107
    Hi
    God bless you.Try to eat lots of vegs and fruits my dear friend,

    KUmar
  • fuzzytrouble
    fuzzytrouble Member Posts: 212
    daisy366 said:

    Caution about benzodiazepine medication
    Ativan, xanax, klonipin, valium, librium, and others are benzodiazepines - they are sedative DEPRESSANTS. This class of drug is insidious - and personally, I think dangerous unless properly monitored by a competent professional. Take caution and research all benzodiazepines. They are meant to be taken for a VERY SHORT TIME - generally 3 months. They are addictive and when taken with alcohol can cause black-outs (being awake and not knowing what you are doing). I have personal knowledge of the danger!!!

    Doctors are prescribing these like candy and for long term with sometimes disastrous results. We have enough problems and don't need any others.

    With caring, Mary Ann

    Thank you
    Hey Mary Ann, I am one who does not like to take pills like that and I did read that it is addictive so I have only taken one so far. I will eat dark chocolate if I feel really low, and look at my new grand daughters pictures. lol
    You are so right the doctor's seem to just give us stuff and then we have to be so careful to monitor it ourselves. I felt like drinking a few stiff drinks this past week but today I am feeling better and not so teary. I take Tylenol for pain rather than other pain pills. Thanks you your formation, I needed to see that.

    Taking it one day at a time,
    Sharon
  • lociee
    lociee Member Posts: 102

    Thank you
    I know I have many ears out here and like you I also get so nervous when the scan time comes. I kind of had a feeling about this one, because I just wasn't feeling right for awhile. My body felt heavy and my ankles were swelling more than usual. I don't want to frighten anyone but please pay attention to your body more than ever. I am very depressed now and don't know if I should ask for anti-depression pills or not, will it make me worse or will they help with the feeling of this new dx? I cry at everything now and I don't even want to move to go anywhere. I would like some help with the depression bit. I am not a person of faith, I have my reasons, so please don't be upset with me for that. My husband does and I know so many of you have on this site. I know that many of you have gone past the two different times of chemo and I to will fight this with all my heart and your support, but right now it's a toughie to deal with.

    Living with great hope

    Sorry!
    Hi Sharon, keep up the fight! I've been back and forth for years, myself. I am a total lorazapam freak - I think it's also called adavan? I take it every night at bedtime - and whenever I'm feeling anxious - like just before an MRI when I have to once again go down that claustrophobic tunnel. It comes in various strengths - I recommend asking the doctor about the low strength and trying it. It's more gentle on the system then anti-depressants - with few side effects (I never had any). It just takes the edge off. Interesting that you come from Cambridge. I raised two daughters there - and we loved it for 20 years! Now I live in Somerville. The best to you - and know that everyone is behind you - cares for you - and hopes for the best.
    Mia
  • fuzzytrouble
    fuzzytrouble Member Posts: 212
    kumar said:

    Hi
    God bless you.Try to eat lots of vegs and fruits my dear friend,

    KUmar

    Fruits and veggies
    Hi KUmar, thank you for your support I inhale it all from the wonderful people here. Now, on the fruits and veggies I have always been big on doing that and all the soy stuff and all the healthy pills and still here I sit with cancer yet again. I like all healthy foods and I guess what I am trying to say is that I get so frustrated with all this healthy stuff they tell you eat and not to eat, so I just am eating what I want now and it will be my choice not what they tell you on t.v. I am a veggie person more than a meat person and I really do think that it's how much we eat that gets us in trouble. I think that any food that has been processed with so much chemicals is so very bad and what they give animals to produce more meat and eggs is so wrong, I grew up in that generation and just thought it was the way of life. What kind of diet do you do? How about the rest of you, any special thing you want to share?

    Lots of hugs to you all,
    Sharon
  • california_artist
    california_artist Member Posts: 816 Member

    Thank you
    Hey Mary Ann, I am one who does not like to take pills like that and I did read that it is addictive so I have only taken one so far. I will eat dark chocolate if I feel really low, and look at my new grand daughters pictures. lol
    You are so right the doctor's seem to just give us stuff and then we have to be so careful to monitor it ourselves. I felt like drinking a few stiff drinks this past week but today I am feeling better and not so teary. I take Tylenol for pain rather than other pain pills. Thanks you your formation, I needed to see that.

    Taking it one day at a time,
    Sharon

    Pain??? What pain?
    Sharon,

    I didn't know you were in pain. I thought they discovered the recurrence with a CT or PET scan. I just keep on missing things. I think it's cause I stumble out here in the morning to see what people have posted and haven't fully woken up yet.

    I'm thinking of changing my schedule and coming to Oregon more towards the beginning of December. I haven't seen my family for many years and would love to spend the Christmas holiday with them and spend some time at Borders with you drinking coffee and having a good time, as you suggested. And I won't even mind if you cry in your coffee. I'll explain to people that it's not cause we're breaking up, but that it's a medical issue. Aren't we going to have a fun time. Hang in there.

    Sounds just marvey pooh to me. Don't they have lovely pastries there? Where I live they don't really have any idea what civilization even looks like nor how civilized people are supposed to treat one another.


    Love ya,

    Claudia

    Thinking of writing a book about this town.

    Love,

    Claudia
  • california_artist
    california_artist Member Posts: 816 Member

    Fruits and veggies
    Hi KUmar, thank you for your support I inhale it all from the wonderful people here. Now, on the fruits and veggies I have always been big on doing that and all the soy stuff and all the healthy pills and still here I sit with cancer yet again. I like all healthy foods and I guess what I am trying to say is that I get so frustrated with all this healthy stuff they tell you eat and not to eat, so I just am eating what I want now and it will be my choice not what they tell you on t.v. I am a veggie person more than a meat person and I really do think that it's how much we eat that gets us in trouble. I think that any food that has been processed with so much chemicals is so very bad and what they give animals to produce more meat and eggs is so wrong, I grew up in that generation and just thought it was the way of life. What kind of diet do you do? How about the rest of you, any special thing you want to share?

    Lots of hugs to you all,
    Sharon

    Ah?
    So, is that a yes or no to pastries at Borders, eh?????

    : ~ /

    I'm the goofy looking one on the left. The rest are my brothers and sister at heather's wedding, she's the one without a shoe that lives near you.

    claudia