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Cancer and Advanced Cancer....

Shayenne's picture
Shayenne
Posts: 2370
Joined: Jan 2009

I was wondering, if people are at Stage 4 Advanced Cancer to a person who is at a Stage 4 Cancer, I thought it was advanced anyway at any stage, but what is the difference? Is Stage 4 advanced too late too do anything with? Would it be too late to juice or try other alternatives? This kept me up last night wondering what to do.

Hugsss!
~Donna

tammy41's picture
tammy41
Posts: 50
Joined: Mar 2007

donna so sorry you had a bad night. i love reading your post i can always relate to them. i found out in march of 07 stage 4 with mets to the liver. that year had colon surgery and liver resection. then folfox and avastin. clear for 6 months then cea started to go up. found 2 spots on lung and they put me on cpt11 and erbatux. cea still going up so 5 months ago they put me on a trial 3 weeks ago ct scan showed stable not what i wanted but happy about it now. i have been coming to this board every day ok maybe 2 or 3 times a day and i always read your post.you are so positive. so when i saw you post this morning i was really sad . one thing i have learned from here is IT IS NEVER TO LATE..... stay positive take care tammy

Shayenne's picture
Shayenne
Posts: 2370
Joined: Jan 2009

I have my bad days as well, but do try to stay as positive as I can, then sometimes a "Get Real" moment will hit me, and then I have to think that there ARE survivors out there, and I can do this, I have too! Thanks for your kind words, I didn't think I helped anyone, I try, but it's nice to hear I actually do, you made my day.

Hugsss!
~Donna

tammy41's picture
tammy41
Posts: 50
Joined: Mar 2007

i understand about the bad days.but im sure as the day goes on you will find out i am not the only person on this board that you have HELPED you are a wonderful and caring person. and you can do this one day at a time. hang in there things will get better. your friend tammy

Sonia32's picture
Sonia32
Posts: 1078
Joined: Mar 2009

as clift said you young lady are not going anywhere & its never to late to change your lifestyle etc so if need be you get juicing girl.but l also believe our minds affect a lot what goes on with our bodies again what uncle clift says:-p seriously lf you find yourself dwelling clift ls right focus on something else.as l pm you you are a great person and you are always there for everyone so never forget that as you always hug everyone sending a big one your way lots of love and hugs

Shayenne's picture
Shayenne
Posts: 2370
Joined: Jan 2009

...Sonia for your friendship. I love chatting to you in PM, you are so fun, and so kind, and Clifty is always right, my mind is strong now, and I need to keep it there, and not keep thinking ahead, yeah, I am going to add juicing to my diet and take it from there, and hope it makes me at least abit more energetic lol...I feel so laggy, and know I am anemic, and it has alot to do with it, iron deficiency, and I HATE iron pills, they make me queasy!
I have to appreciate you all being there for me as well, I love my semi-colon family :)

Hugssss and Loveeeee!
~Donna

Buzzard's picture
Buzzard
Posts: 3073
Joined: Aug 2008

First of all, you dwell on the wrong things to often, dwell on your favorite actor, or your favorite dessert, as soon as this type of thinking comes to you(which it normally does when we are alone, in the shower, or first getting into bed). Stage 1 Stage 2 Stage 3 Stage 4 is simply terms to identify the particular care that you will get during the treatment phase, and also the type of surgery or surgeries that come with the staging. It doesn't matter if we are Stage 1 or Stage 15 we'll go when we go. Thats all of us...We all we're born as someone in here stated once with a bad prognosis. I for one use this as a chance for someone else to not suffer or go through what I did during the emotional rollercoaster that we go through when first diagnosed. This is a chance for me to make my mark and do something good for the people in my world, and you do the same through advocacy of the disease, care, health, and experiences told. We are all tough birds, and we will all kick its tail sooner or later. Please, never dwell on this, when you feel it starting to rain on your parade, then find another parade. Tell your husband or your children to make you your favorite dessert, or fix your favorite pillow just right, but you have to make your mind up to never allow yourself to let the mind stay constant on something bad in your life.
If we get cut we get bandaids or sticthes, if we get a stomach ache we get Pepto-Bismol, if we get a headache we get aspirin or Tylenol, SO, if we get down we get something to get us up.As I said before kick a "plastic" trashcan. Great rehab and frustration taker outer onner...LOL...But young lady, your not going anywhere, so put on your to go hat and lets get busy living life instead of avoiding it......Love ya hun, Clift

abmb's picture
abmb
Posts: 311
Joined: Sep 2009

I am so sorry to read you had a bad night. I cannot imagine what goes through your mind, I am only a caretaker. I do read your posts and I know you really do try to boost everyone's moral. Try to stay positive, I think that a person's strong will does help them cope with their illness. I pray everynight that my husband keeps positive thinking about his illness and I do Pray at night for all suffering from this disease. Keep strong and try to stay positive. God Bless. Margaret

Shayenne's picture
Shayenne
Posts: 2370
Joined: Jan 2009

I can always count on my bro to kick my butt back into gear, you're so right, I tend to dwell on things too long. I was just having a recertification with my home health nurse today who is also a personal friend, her son goes to school with my daughter, and we were talking about life, she is having colon problems as well, and we had a little crying spell, but I feel better now getting it out, my thoughts and all, I just needed a check in I guess! Been feeling abit down, not around my kids though, I am usually positive and focused, but for some reason something just came over me last night, I got spooked I guess, and thank you Margaret, for your sweet comment, I will stay strong, I have too! Next time I get like this, someone really cuss me out or whip me, because I deserve it! I thank my friends here, and love you all, we will beat this, and can't let it win!

Hugsss!
~Donna

grandmafay's picture
grandmafay
Posts: 1639
Joined: Aug 2009

It's never too late. I was going to add something to that first sentence, but I decided that said it all. Hey, venting and putting your concerns in writing is good. It doesn't just help you, it helps others. As a caregiver, it helps me better understand what my husband is going through. I often read your posts, Donna, and I like many other caregivers have learned a lot from you. We don't have young children, and I can't imagine dealing with this if we did. You are amazingly strong and caring. My prayers are with you. Fay

AceSFO's picture
AceSFO
Posts: 230
Joined: Sep 2009

Hey Donna,

I agree with the others on here! I'm the caregiver, and my partner has said right from the start "you can't change the diagnosis, but you can change the way you experience it." So who cares if the oncs are calling stage 4 or whatever. Go get your kids and go out for ice cream cones and vent on here as often as feels useful.

The other thing that helps me get through this is something an older woman once said to me. She was one of those formidable, octogenarian women who seem to be able to withstand anything. She said that people often asked her where she got her strength and resilience from and she would always say that for her being strong meant giving yourself permission to just hit the floor when you need to. Then, pick yourself back up and get on with it. Trying to stay strong all the time, she said, wears you out. The trick is in the balance.

Sending you light and love from sunny San Francisco,
Adrian

2bhealed's picture
2bhealed
Posts: 2085
Joined: Dec 2001

to start juicing and trying alternatives. What do you have to lose? Skip the ice cream and sugary desserts if you are serious about trying to heal your cancer otherwise you're just feeding it. STARVE that $#@(*^!! cancer!

Go to Target and get the $90 juicer if you don't want to spend the $250 for the nicer ones (Champion or Omega). Then go to your local coop and get ORGANIC produce and get juicing!!!

The enzymes and live food will give you energy to help heal your body. Dead food, sugary foods will only rob you of your energy. Sure, it may pick you up emotionally for a minute or five, but in the long run, if you are serious about trying to heal and really want to do this then commit to it full bore and GO FOR IT!! Regardless of if it's called Advanced or whatever. You'll FEEL better anyway.

Rather than sugary treats get a massage! Much better for you!

I liked Adrian's point about allowing yourself to hit the ground every so often. The important thing is that you get back up. We all go through blue periods of wondering. It's part of the process and the journey to healing.

Donna, you rock girlfriend!

peace, emily

Fight for my love
Posts: 1530
Joined: Jun 2009

Hi dear Donna,my opinion is whether it is stage 1 or stage 4,cancer is caner.Unfortunately you have to fight for the odds whether it is stage 1 or stage 4.It's never too late to do anything you want for changing your life style and anything else you feel comfortable with.If you still want to do these things,that means you are still very postive.Go ahead and do it.Take care.Hugsss.

Shayenne's picture
Shayenne
Posts: 2370
Joined: Jan 2009

...waiting on some money to come in to get me the Omega. I just don't know what to expect from juicing, or getting sick from it, but I really want to change my diet and starve it, I'm still reading that Patrick Quillen book, haven't finished yet, I really don't know how to or where to start, I just hope the juicer comes with a dvd to instruct me on it, I am going to check for health food stores around my area as well, do I need to get a naturopathic to help me or can this be done without one? It isn't going to hurt me I'm sure to try, I can give up the sugar if it can save my life, I really do need some energy, I even had a tuna sandwhich today and a shower and I feel better (I don't even eat tuna that much, but you said something about Omega 3's here and Fish so I bought some LOL) I will hopefully start after my 12th chemo on Wednesday, and hope this does make me feel better, I wonder what my doctor thinks about this stuff, I should ask her, she never mentions diet.

Thanks FFML, for that comment, you're right, cancer is cancer, and it just plain sucks, we'll see what happens when I really put up a fight with my eating habits, I am sure going to miss it! but I'm sure learning new recipes and ways to eat will be good as well! it's just hard getting started, but I'm going to try! Emily, I hope you don't mind if I PM you at times to learn new stuff, and getting started, this may really help me, I eat like crap, and really need the change, once I get my juicer, I may need help with it!

Thanks for being so inspiring Emily as well!

Hugsss!
~Donna

Fight for my love
Posts: 1530
Joined: Jun 2009

Hi dear Donna,I would like to give you a couple of recipes not related with juicing.I think they are very healthy and my husband likes them.You know,I am Chinese,so I always make Chinese food for my husband.

Recipe one:Steam brocoli for a couple of minutes after the water is boiled,then put Chinese sesame seed oil,olive oil,black pepper,a little seasalt or regular salt on the top of brocoli.That's it,you eat it as a salad.

Recipe two:Stir fried tomato with eggs
Step 1:Scramble eggs in a bowl,then put canola oil in the wok,when the oil is hot,put the eggs in and stir.When the eggs are firm and shaped,take them out,put them in a plate.

Step 2:Cut tomato into small pieces,put canola oil in the wok,then put some Chinese leek in the oil,when you can smell the smell of the leek,put the tomato in and stir.When you can see the tomato is well cooked,(This means you can see tomato pieces are soft and juicy),then put the cooked eggs,a little salt,a little white pepper in,mix them up evenly.This is done.You eat it as a regular dish.

These two dishes are simple,and it doesn't take too much work to make them.Hopefully this is going to be helpful to you and your family.Give a try,you may like them.Take care.Hugsss.

Nana b's picture
Nana b
Posts: 3045
Joined: May 2009

I use this one, got it on sale at Kohls.

http://www.powerjuicer.com/?gclid=CMTcxbPWsJ0CFQmbnAodLFmXhQ

Hang in there. Eat some greens.

Patteee's picture
Patteee
Posts: 950
Joined: Jul 2009

OH MY
I lived in Beijing and NE China about 10 years ago- and have been craving the egg and tomato dish and couldn't exactly remember how to do it!! Thanks!!

ps Donna, both are fabulous treats!

Fight for my love
Posts: 1530
Joined: Jun 2009

Hi Pattee,it's great to know that you ever lived in Beijing for such a long time.Me and my hubby lived in Beijing for three years before he went back to the U.S.I bet you like China,right?I am still missing lots of those good days when we were living in Beijng.Beijing has changed a lot over the last five years,it is more beautiful.If you like Chinese food and if you don't know how to cook it,you can always ask me,I may not know all of them,but I can google the recipes for you in Chinese.Take care.Good luck with your egg and tomato.

daydreamer110761's picture
daydreamer110761
Posts: 497
Joined: Dec 2008

Girl, I am sorry you had a bad night, but you have to know that you came in here almost a year ago and have lifted so many spirits, including mine, just reading your posts. With as much as you have been through you always have something uplifting to say to everyone, and everyone here loves you and worries when you aren't here!

I really try not to wonder about things anymore, (although we all still do)it's a waste of positive energy. So, turn on the comedy channel and laugh a bit!

Fight for my love - great recipes - love the egg one and intend to try it! would love to be able to cook more chinese than sweet and sour chicken! Think maybe I will order out tonight!

sfmarie's picture
sfmarie
Posts: 605
Joined: Aug 2009

One thing I have learned on this journey is that you have to be the one to seek out other options, treatments and diagnoses. Don't wait for then to suggest it, ask for it and see what they say. I have read many of your posts, and you are such a caring person always posting for everyone words of encouragement. You really care and take the time to comment.
My sister has be her own advocate. Has sought out 4 opinions; two of which think she could be misdiagnosed with ovarian cancer (since it spread to her ovaries) and one thinks she could be a candidate for clinical trials and SIR Spheres. Noone suggested this to her, she had to go out and seek other opinions. She is also stage IV, mets to liver and peritoneum. You can and will beat this! It's never too late, keep the faith. Marie

Shayenne's picture
Shayenne
Posts: 2370
Joined: Jan 2009

....I feel alot better now, there is so much love here and I can feel it now through these posts, whenever I get down, which is rare, I really try not too let stress and worry invade me too often, but I do care about each and everyone new and not new here, everyone is so wonderful here, that I know what to do now when I get down, I got a big hug from my kids and hubby, they could tell I just wasn't myself, and I finally cried alittle in front of them, which I try not to do, but I couldn't help it, and now everything is out and feel they understand me alot better, and I feel better that they are even dealing with this really positively, I tell them of all the people I meet on here who have been living with this for over 5 years, and let them know of the stories we all post here, and they have so much hope, I just don't want to disappoint them, and they really are worried, but not as bad as me...

FFML, I LOVE Chinese food, that recipe sounds awesome, and I WILL make it, sounds pretty easy, now how do you make egg drop soup??? LOL I tell ya, you need to open a chinese recipe thread so we can all flock to your wonderful chinese cooking! thanks for that! I hope your hubby is doing well!!

Thanks Nana for that link, I'll check it out! I actually had a sweet potato and spinach salad for dinner tonight, nothing sugary, yet, but I don't eat alot of meat anyway, I love greens, I have 3 of my girls who want to turn vegan! But hubby and son I will cook for differently, I think they aren't ready to just eat veggies LOL

And you're so right Sheri, what's the use in wondering about anything anymore, I just have to take one day at a time and stop trying to look ahead of myself, so I told my family I Just can't plan ahead, we have to take the road when we get there, and slow down abit, things have changed, but I try to make things as normal as possible, I love when you post as well, you always make me laugh, which makes my day, I love to laugh at you, and you are also someone who inspired me as well with your great attitude!

Marie, I pray for your sister, and you're right, I been seeking other options as well and want to try anything that will work, really, what can it hurt, and I hope she finds something that will, she can beat this as well, you never know! I hope she does well, and hope you are too, you are such a good caregiver and sister to her, and I bet she loves you so much for being there for her in her time of need. We really appreciate our relatives and caregivers, we know it's not easy watching us go through this, but know something good has to come out of it somewhere! Thanks for taking the time to post to me, you're such a good person!

Hugsss to all!
~Donna

daydreamer110761's picture
daydreamer110761
Posts: 497
Joined: Dec 2008

going back to a really great post I read...

WHY did the chicken cross the road????

(loved your answer)

Shayenne's picture
Shayenne
Posts: 2370
Joined: Jan 2009

.....Thanks! glad you liked it LOL! First thing that came to mind!

Fight for my love
Posts: 1530
Joined: Jun 2009

Hi dear Donna,I am glad that you love Chinese food.Egg drop soup is easy,it all depends on what you like to put in the soup.My hubby likes tomato egg drop soup,but you can always replace tomato by any vegetable that you like,or you don't need to put vege at all.

Recipe:Egg drop soup(tomato)
Chop tomato to small pieces,then put canola oil in wok,then then put some Chinese leek in the oil,when you can smell the smell of the leek,put the tomato in and stir.When you can see the tomato is well cooked,(This means you can see tomato pieces are soft and juicy),then put water in,wait until the water is boiled,then put salt,white pepper,put the scrambled egg in the soup,then use a big spoon to push the egg a little bit,this way the soup will get even.When the soup is boiled again,it is done.(don't overly boil the soup,because the egg drop will get hard)

PS:If you don't like vege in the soup,only plain egg drop soup,you can just put oil and Chinese leek in the wok first,then put water in,wait the water boiled,then put scrambled egg in,salt and white pepper in.Mix them until the soup is even.Before you serve it to family,if you and your family like sesame seed oil and cilantro,put them in the soup,it is very tasty.

Dear Donna,good luck with making Chinese food!You are very welcome to ask me for the recipe of Chinese food at anytime.Hugsss.

Shayenne's picture
Shayenne
Posts: 2370
Joined: Jan 2009

...Thank you so much girlfriend! My son and hubby loves this soup as well, and never had it with tomato in it, I love tomatos! it makes anything taste good! I will definitely ask you for more recipes! lol...my hubby already wants to know how to make war su guy is it??? I can't spell it, but it's a chicken dish, and he just loves it, looks like a fried chicken breast.

We live at the Chinese Buffett in the town where we shop at, and pick at everything, you're so sweet to give out the recipes. I bet you rock in the kitchen, your hubby is a happy man! You're a wonderful caregiver, and know you take such great care of him, hard job I know, I told my hubby today how much I appreciated him, and know how hard it is for him to see me like this, and he just keeps saying, "things will get better"....he's so positive as well!

Thanks again for these recipes, how much water do you add to this soup?

Hugsss!
~Donna

Fight for my love
Posts: 1530
Joined: Jun 2009

Hi dear Donna,our forum got hijacked,I had to search your post,finally I found it.It's so annoying that bad people do these things to us,especially to us,people whom need help and who need to help to each other.I don't understand some people's moral standard.

Well,let me answer your question:how much water in the soup totally depends on how many people you want to serve.I know you have a big family,4 kids plus you and hubby,totally 6 people.So you can put 5 cups(40 ounces)water in the wok.If you serve for 3 people,you can reduce the water to the half.Of course,if you want to have a little more soup,then put a little more water,and a little more seasoning.Anyway just taste the flavor before you have it done,if you feel like it is short of something,then add a little more.

Next time please remember the chicken's name,so I can get you the recipe.My hubby likes ascian food,because he was the field staff engineer of ascian-pacific area for years,he was living in China with me back then and also travelling around the whole asia.We are missing lots of Chinese food and Chinese seasonings,it's not so easy to get real Chinese seasonings in NH.We have very small number population of ascians here.

My hubby is doing well.He has been out of the surgery for 5 weeks and a half.His pathology report came out really good,he was down staged from stage2 to stage1 by the preoperative chemo and radiation.Now he decided to take 6-month adjuvant chemo in order to reduce the recurrance risk as much as possible.So next week,the doctor is going to put a port on his chest area.I am so happy that so far so good,everything is moving to the right way.

Dear Donna,please PM anytime you want to let me know if you need Chinese food recipes.Your husband is right,things will get better.Please also remember that there is always hope and do whatever you can to kick this beast's butt,you will win.You win,your family wins with you together.Take care.Hugsss.

grammadebbie's picture
grammadebbie
Posts: 431
Joined: Jun 2009

Dear One,

You are so precious to me and I'm sure all who know you. You need to be able to come here and pour your heart and emotions out. We all understand, there is a great balance here. We need nurturing and getting our "butts kicked" and it is all so very helpful. You are a very caring and compassionate person and we are all here for you. You just hold on to those sweet memories and moments with your family and that will help you to keep that fighting spirit you have. You have come a long way and we're all right here with you. You're always in my prayers sweetie.

God Bless You,

Debbie (gramma)

Annabelle41415's picture
Annabelle41415
Posts: 6448
Joined: Feb 2009

I'm thinking and praying for you and hoping that all goes well with the rest of your treatment. You are one strong woman and your husband and children have to be so proud of you for being so giving of a person. You give so much on this board that I can only imagine how much you give to them. Keep up the spirit.

Hugs! Kim

robinvan's picture
robinvan
Posts: 1014
Joined: May 2007

You have heard it here girl! We are of one heart and of one mind around this. It is not too late! Stage 4 be damned! Cancer will be eliminated from your body and then it will be prevented from recurring by a strong prevention program which will include all these good things! AND juice to boot!

I hope you sleep better tonight!

Rob; in Van

dianetavegia's picture
dianetavegia
Posts: 1953
Joined: Mar 2009

I want that recipe!

angelsbaby's picture
angelsbaby
Posts: 1171
Joined: May 2008

Why is this worrying you ? Angel was different he was stage 3 c then went to stage 4. We both heard from the dr when they saw so many tumors all over in jan thats when they said it was very advanced I think it is the size of the tumors and the amount you have in and location that make it advanced Thats how it was explained to angel and i. but the drs still wanted to do chemo . I hope i did not offend anyone. And I would keep fighting any way i could God bless you donna..

Michelle

Shayenne's picture
Shayenne
Posts: 2370
Joined: Jan 2009

I don't know why it was worrying Michelle. I though advanced may have been too terminal to do anything with? when I want to make some changes, and was hoping it wasn't too late, but I feel good, and feel better, and it was just the down mood I was in. I do my 12th treatment and hope we do something different soon, to shrink these tumors smaller. THanks for everything Angel :) Hope you been doing well. How is your brother doing?

Diane, I just baked a sweet potatoe, to eat just like that with some butter, salt and pepper, and the spinach salad, I just throw in some feta cheese, salt, pepper and olive oyl. You can add dressing to it, but I just like spinach raw like that, sometimes I sit there just eating the leaves out of a bowl, I just have always loved spinach!

Hope you all have a great day!

Hugsss!
~Donna

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