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FAPmom & Tiny one

kristasplace's picture
kristasplace
Posts: 956
Joined: Oct 2007

Hi Jackie! I know i'm not checking in as often as i should, but i haven't seen any posts from you. How are you doing? I know they've fixed you up some, and hopefully you're out enjoying your new life! Drop an e- to let us know how you're doing!

Tiny, i read one of your posts recently that you're still having trouble. I think about you and Jackie all of the time. Especially when things get really tough around here. I've started venturing out of the house, but it's a very fragile balance when i do. I have to make sure i haven't eaten, and i can't eat even the littlest thing without expecting a looooong time in a restroom, or having to make many uncomfortable trips to the restroom. It's been embarrassing at get-togethers. Even though everyone knows i have these problems, they always look so concerned, and there's a strange stillness when i come back into the room.

My next colonoscopy isn't until August 14th, but i'm already starting to panic about it. They're making me drink the full golytly, and i'm soooo scared about what it's going to do to my colon! I'm thinking i should put my pillow and blanket in the bathtub and have plenty of things to read in the bathroom on prep night. Everyone is very right about the takedown being the hardest part of the recovery process. Besides cracking ribs from straining on the potty, the constipation is the suckiest part!

Let me know how it's going for the two of you!

Hugs,
Krista

tiny one
Posts: 467
Joined: Jan 2009

Hi Krista! I still have bad days when I'm in the bathroom alot and have soreness and pain. I had a Cat scan done monday july 6th. I woke up at 4:00 am and was in the bathroom on and off till around 8:00 am. I called and they said I could take lomotil, this did help some. It started in again after I got home, just felt headachey and sore from going to the bathroom so much. I dreaded having my first colonoscopy after my reversal. My surgeon let me wait longer because of my issues. I made it thru the prep but it was not easy. I did sitz baths and used cream. Unfortunately they wouldn't let me take my pain meds. I had a sigmoidoscopy June 27th and felt good for a whole week after, no potty problems at all after the scope. I was sedated for the procedure, the surgeon said everything looked good. I'm still dependant on lomotil, it enables me to be able to get out and be active and not be in the bathroom. I still have alot of foods I avoid and I try not to eat alot at one time. Needless to say I weigh less now than I did in high school. I've always been under 90 pounds. This is not a good diet to be on. I hope your issues get better. This is a hard thing to deal with mentally, I know. It does get better but it takes time.

kristasplace's picture
kristasplace
Posts: 956
Joined: Oct 2007

Hi Tiny! Your potty issues are just like mine except yours seem to be loose bowels, and mine are plugged up. The constipation is horrendous. Go a little here, go a little there, and never getting much relief. I down the miralax like no tomorrow, and it never seems to work. I think it's a sham. You know that contrast crap they give you for scans isn't very safe. I read your other post about not feeling well afterwards, do they ever tell you to drink a ton of water? A nurse described the contrast going through your kidney's like pudding being sucked through a straw! That really freaked me out. I drink tons of water after a scan now.

As far as weight, i've always tended to be on the opposite end of the spectrum from you. I haven't weighed 90 lbs since i was ten! Kidding, but really, i was eighty lbs overweight before the cancer started making me sick, and thought my diet and exercise routine caused me to lose sixty of it! During the adjuvant chemo, i gained sixty-four lbs!! Since this last surgery, i've lost twenty-five lbs, and it's going to continue going down because my entire relationship with food has changed. I used to love it! Now i loathe it, and spend most of my time starving because i refuse to eat. When i do eat, the portions are a fraction of what they used to be. I'll never complain about losing weight, but i don't like the feeling of being hungry all the time. I know there are certain things i can eat that won't plug me up, but i'm even afraid of them! Are you losing weight because of this same reason? Are you afraid of food now?

Yes, things have slowly improved and there are still nightmare moments, but OMG, things are better than they were! I no longer wish i were dead, for one thing! And i do have the desire to go out and do things (though not nearly as much as i would like). I want to take my dogs to dog beach, but if i get an attack...there's no bathroom! I'm really glad you're able to get out. I need to find a miracle drug like you have. So far, it's just the oxycodone. If i take one of those, i'm sure not to have bathroom issues.

Congratulations on your clear scope! That's some wonderful news!

Many hugs,
Krista

tiny one
Posts: 467
Joined: Jan 2009

Hi Krista! I'm not afraid of food,but right after my reversal I didn't want to eat and had to make myself eat. I had lost around 10 pounds while I was in the hospital and looked anorexic. That was due to my stoma not being open enough, I couldn't keep anything down for around 5 days. My surgeon stretched the stoma and then I could eat and keep food down. Didn't take long to put a little weight back on. I've always loved food and could usually eat anything I wanted. I've always stayed around 87-93 pound range all my life, except for when I was pregnant. Some days I eat stuff I shouldn't because I just can't resist, and sometimes I pay for it, but it's not fun to eat the same stuff everyday. I'm waiting for someone to ask me how I stay so thin. They won't be expecting to hear it was due to colon cancer. I don't eat very much red meat anymore and I miss this. Sometimes on weekends I will eat a steak and a larger meal and then I'm in the bathroom more but I know how to use my meds and keep the potty problems to a minimum. Try and keep a food journal, it might be helpful to you.

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