Hello sisters !
The thing is.. i went for bone-density test and EKG today and something clicked in me.. i was going to be ok no matter what! The beast does not have me, and I WILL SURVIVE111 We all have different meds. different Dr.'s and yet we are all still fighting the beast! It is something within each of us that makes us fight and makes us survivors! I pulled on my big girl panties once again and in my heart i know i will be ok.. no matter what.
I love you all so much for listening and all the help you are to me.. may you all have sweet peaceful dreams tonight
jackie
Comments
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DREAMS
Hi Jackie, I was just about to go to sleep but decided to stop here first. Excuse me if some of this sounds odd as I am well drugged due to surgery. There is no need to say you are sorry, we all have had similar things happen on our journey through cancer land. We are here for you not only in good times but in difficult ones too (especially in difficult ones.)
I am glad you are feeling better, stronger so to speak. I always tell myself it is time to pull myself up by my boot straps when I begin to fall into the pit of despair. You keep that chin up Jackie and keep fighting the beast! You have come so very far and you have so much to live for. You too have been an inspiration to me as I have read your posts of encouragement to others, you are a great lady!
RE0 -
You go, Jackie!
Good morning, Jackie! Turns out the puppies summoned the Food God instead of the Food Goddess this morning.
So here I am online at 3 freaking 52 in the morning, shaking my head in awe yet again at how you always, no matter what the situation, always pick yourself up, pull up those Big Girl Panties, and move on. Your courage and grace are, as always, an inspiration to us all. There is no way on God's earth that the beast will be able to beat you, Jackie.
Love,
Joe0 -
Something Within Us!
You are right, Jackie, and no one has more strength of will or faith than you. You will be OK--more than OK!
No need to feel sorry about sharing your emotions, up or down, or just venting. But you know that, too, don't you? You have written those words to many of us.
So, have a good weekend up there with Bob and Tootsie and beautiful Montana. And sweet dreams to you.
Love,
Food Goddess of the late(r) morning today0 -
I'm okay--you're okay
My husband and I have been goiing 'round and round about treatments. I want to stomp on this beast with all there is, whatever it does to me in the short-term.
But my chances of recurrence are so low, chemo gives me NO benefit, and has long-term risks. Likewise other surgeries (removing ovaries or uterus.) So I'm not doing any of those. I just took my second pill of Tamoxifen (one day into 5 years), and I'm worried about side effects. (I was actually told if the side effects are bad for me, I can just quit because my risk of recurrance is so low!)
My whole point is that deciding what treatment to do is not easy. When you were thrown for a loop with changes to what you thought was coming, those decisions and your mind set were tossed out. I can't imagine how that must have made you feel.
Hugs, lisa0 -
hi liz, i am so glad i foundLtalcott said:I'm okay--you're okay
My husband and I have been goiing 'round and round about treatments. I want to stomp on this beast with all there is, whatever it does to me in the short-term.
But my chances of recurrence are so low, chemo gives me NO benefit, and has long-term risks. Likewise other surgeries (removing ovaries or uterus.) So I'm not doing any of those. I just took my second pill of Tamoxifen (one day into 5 years), and I'm worried about side effects. (I was actually told if the side effects are bad for me, I can just quit because my risk of recurrance is so low!)
My whole point is that deciding what treatment to do is not easy. When you were thrown for a loop with changes to what you thought was coming, those decisions and your mind set were tossed out. I can't imagine how that must have made you feel.
Hugs, lisa
hi liz, i am so glad i found you again. these choices we have during this cancer journey are so difficult. thrown for a loop is an understatement. you are just not sure what the best thing for you is, it sometimes would be better if the dock told us what treatment to take. i know that you will make the best decision for yourself and your family. i give you my support. incidentlly, my husband's last psa was 3.1 so we are thinking that the last psa that was 18 was an error. we went to lahey clinic in boston for a second opinion and the new doctor ordered a more comprehensive psa test. so all if good with potential prostate cancer for my husband. what a stresser though. yikes! good thoughts and hugs. peggy0 -
HULLO, Mr. Professor!Aortus said:You go, Jackie!
Good morning, Jackie! Turns out the puppies summoned the Food God instead of the Food Goddess this morning.
So here I am online at 3 freaking 52 in the morning, shaking my head in awe yet again at how you always, no matter what the situation, always pick yourself up, pull up those Big Girl Panties, and move on. Your courage and grace are, as always, an inspiration to us all. There is no way on God's earth that the beast will be able to beat you, Jackie.
Love,
Joe
Good morning to you, too! Good to see you back here with us, Joe! A signal to all that Moopy's feeling much better following her final chemo last week. (Moopy "popped in" yesterday...)
Kind regards, Susan
P.S.: Although sorry your canine companions woke you at an ungodly hour earlier today - on a precious Saturday, no less - am selfishly grateful they did... Because it led you here, to the board... :-)0 -
HULLO to you, too, Moopy!Moopy23 said:Something Within Us!
You are right, Jackie, and no one has more strength of will or faith than you. You will be OK--more than OK!
No need to feel sorry about sharing your emotions, up or down, or just venting. But you know that, too, don't you? You have written those words to many of us.
So, have a good weekend up there with Bob and Tootsie and beautiful Montana. And sweet dreams to you.
Love,
Food Goddess of the late(r) morning today
Of course, am so glad to see YOU here again today!
You probably already knew that, had to say it, anyway... :-)
Kind regards, Susan0 -
Hi Jackiepeggy65 said:it makes us all happy when
it makes us all happy when we hear that someone else is feeling better. good for you. hugs, peggy
Jackie:
Always have Faith in God and He will lead you through. Jackie, I know that you can make it no matter what. Remember, I always look up to you for encouragement and enlightenment, so never give-up. I know its easy to say, but just like you, sometimes I feel awful too...I try to fight it with positive thoughts and after a couple of days, I feel much better - that is after the chemo treatment.
Do take care of yourself...
Joy0 -
Hi Joe!Aortus said:You go, Jackie!
Good morning, Jackie! Turns out the puppies summoned the Food God instead of the Food Goddess this morning.
So here I am online at 3 freaking 52 in the morning, shaking my head in awe yet again at how you always, no matter what the situation, always pick yourself up, pull up those Big Girl Panties, and move on. Your courage and grace are, as always, an inspiration to us all. There is no way on God's earth that the beast will be able to beat you, Jackie.
Love,
Joe
changing the subject but ..have you tried pedi-paws for your pups? I just bought it for Tootsie yesterday..will be interesting!
My best to you, Moopy, and the pups!
jackie0 -
Dear, dear Jackie... :-)
No need to apologize! We understand your recent rollercoaster ride. We've all had our turns. Felt bad for you, dear. (That final chemo can be a real doozy, to put it mildly. Whacks out the body AND the mind, yes? Add on top of all that an unexpected change in anticipated direction - geez.)
You know I was thinking of you yesterday, because of your tests. YAY! Am so happy that you experienced an epiphany, leading to renewed vigor to continue your own battle with the beast - which you most certainly WILL win! I can see that ugly beast - much, much smaller already than when it first came to challenge you... It is cowering in a corner, filled with fear... Beginning to realize it will soon have to turn and RUN AWAY!!! And, never to return!
Kind regards, Susan0 -
Moopy your rightMoopy23 said:Something Within Us!
You are right, Jackie, and no one has more strength of will or faith than you. You will be OK--more than OK!
No need to feel sorry about sharing your emotions, up or down, or just venting. But you know that, too, don't you? You have written those words to many of us.
So, have a good weekend up there with Bob and Tootsie and beautiful Montana. And sweet dreams to you.
Love,
Food Goddess of the late(r) morning today
I do know that i can cry and vent here. I don't know what i would do without you. I hope you have a great day. How are you feeling after the last one Moopy? I am finally coming back around and it feels goooooooooood!! I bought some Rogaine yesterday for my peach fuzz. Sure expensive but look at all i've saved in the last six months!! Bob has called me "curley" all throughout these bald days!!haha (at least he says it lovingly).
love
jackie0 -
Thanks JoyJoyD said:Hi Jackie
Jackie:
Always have Faith in God and He will lead you through. Jackie, I know that you can make it no matter what. Remember, I always look up to you for encouragement and enlightenment, so never give-up. I know its easy to say, but just like you, sometimes I feel awful too...I try to fight it with positive thoughts and after a couple of days, I feel much better - that is after the chemo treatment.
Do take care of yourself...
Joy
God not only gets me through..he carries me, and as you know with the faith of a mustard seed we can move mountains! The chemo does so much to our emotions also. But just knowing that it will get better, makes it all worth it.
Love
jackie0 -
SusanChristmas Girl said:Dear, dear Jackie... :-)
No need to apologize! We understand your recent rollercoaster ride. We've all had our turns. Felt bad for you, dear. (That final chemo can be a real doozy, to put it mildly. Whacks out the body AND the mind, yes? Add on top of all that an unexpected change in anticipated direction - geez.)
You know I was thinking of you yesterday, because of your tests. YAY! Am so happy that you experienced an epiphany, leading to renewed vigor to continue your own battle with the beast - which you most certainly WILL win! I can see that ugly beast - much, much smaller already than when it first came to challenge you... It is cowering in a corner, filled with fear... Beginning to realize it will soon have to turn and RUN AWAY!!! And, never to return!
Kind regards, Susan
Thanks for your comments..that beast better cower..from us all!! I will know about my tests on Monday. I did get an apt. with the radiologist in Billings for the 14th. I am going to call them on Mon. also and find out when exactly the rads start after the markings. And try to find a place to stay in Billings. I'll let you all know.
hugs
jackie0 -
Trumpet of the Swanrjjj said:Susan
Thanks for your comments..that beast better cower..from us all!! I will know about my tests on Monday. I did get an apt. with the radiologist in Billings for the 14th. I am going to call them on Mon. also and find out when exactly the rads start after the markings. And try to find a place to stay in Billings. I'll let you all know.
hugs
jackie
I always think of that book (EB White is one of my all time favorite authors) when I think of Billings. I've only been there for conferences, though. Be sure and check to see if there is a McDonald's type House for big girls (there is one in Boise). Check with the social worker at the hospital where you're getting your rads. I heard in Boston that there is a program where families invite patients to live with them as they receive treatment. Doubt this side of the Rockies is there yet.
Being a frequent dumpster diver (as you well know, since you've often helped pull me out), I am wishing you all the best and hope that spring and sunny days help do the work they're supposed to do, too. Love to you. Lynn0 -
(((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))
That is what makes us Kindred Spirits~ and no apologies are either needed or expected! If we can't vent in here, and be the Queen of the Pity Party now and again, what's the point?! All of the joking, silliness and and foolishness that goes on in here doesn't mask the reason that we find ourselves in here in the first place. We are fighting a fierce battle, against a formidable foe who wants to take us out! It is frightening, and tiring...so we do it together.
I wish I didn't know as much about cancer as I do; I imagine you feel the same way. So, on those days when we don't feel up to the whole she-bang...by all means VENT!
I have been posting about a movie ( 3 minutes online) which will echo what you said about the beast not having you. I encourage you to watch and be further empowered!
www.thesurvivormovie.com
It has all of our names written all over it! I am really glad you are feeling better; no more apologies, ok? :-) :-)
Hugs,
Claudia0 -
Hi Jackie,
Please, don't
Hi Jackie,
Please, don't ever apologize about your feelings or expressing them. If we can't do that here,then where? Yes, you are a true warrior, we all are and so are those that support us.
I am honored to be a small part of this group that makes such a difference in so many lives. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
Love and Gentle Hugs,
Donna0 -
Hi Jackie!djteach said:Hi Jackie,
Please, don't
Hi Jackie,
Please, don't ever apologize about your feelings or expressing them. If we can't do that here,then where? Yes, you are a true warrior, we all are and so are those that support us.
I am honored to be a small part of this group that makes such a difference in so many lives. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
Love and Gentle Hugs,
Donna
I hope that this post finds you feeling better! Don't ever apologize for feeling down..we all get like that!
0
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