Hi all. I wrote for the 1st time around January 15th or so and posted about my husbands journey and battle with cancer.
Unfortunately this wasn't our battle too win. My husband lost his fight with cancer last Sunday February 8th. It has been 1 week today and I just can't believe all that has happened. The week preceeding up to his death went so fast. His health changed from day to day and I feel so robbed of not getting the chance to talk about everything and say our final goodbyes. On Dec. 1st we were told he had 6-12 months to live and we only got 2 months. We weren't ready for this at all. I am happy though that my husband entered hospice in our home on Friday afternoon Feb. 6th and passed early Sunday the 8th. I am glad he didn't have to suffer for a long time in that state and I am glad I was by his side the entire time.
This is going to be the toughest time getting through our 12 1/2 years of marriage and 18 years of life together without him. I am just in a fog and don't want to do anything. I feel like I went from a speedy rollercoaster ride to slamming into a wall and I don't have any focus or direction.
I miss my husband dearly and I missed him so much on V-day. His birthday is this Friday the 20th too. Where does my 6 1/2 year old daughter and I pick up?
Struggling today and probably for a while.