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More Cancer and No Chemo

BonnieR's picture
Posts: 1549
Joined: Jan 2004

We were home early from my Dr visit at the U and chemo was cancelled because of the allergic reaction I had last time. They said it would only get worse and my air passages would swell shut on me. Plus my ca125 went up again and the ct-scan showed that not only did the previous areas grow but there was new tumor growth. My Dr is trying to get a different drug approved; if it isn't approved we will try weekly taxol. Of course I have already shed some tears, oh well the good news is I probably won't be sick from chemo for Christmas.

The tumor on my liver has doubled in size and there is another one on the lower lobe now also, the tumor by colon is double in size and has a partner growing right next to it, same with the tumors in pelvis all have increased in size and there are two more new growths on my left side and they say additional small seedings and the area on my vaginal cuff is double in size too. So not very good news at all.

My dr is trying to get the drig Nexavar(sorafenib) tabllets (it has been in studies so far) for me, it is similar to avastin but is a pill. You take it along with chemo infusion, either carbo or gemzar and he said carbo is out so it would be gemzar. My cancer grew quite a bit when I was on gemzar and I was sick from it but maybe with the new drug it would work. Otherwise my only option is to try a taxol drug which has never worked for me but its been several years since we've tried it, so just never know.

I've been keeping up with all the posts and send you all many prayers and hugs.

Merry Christmas Bonnie

PS Monika thanks for the Email and taxotere is out as my cancer grew in leaps and bounds when we tried that but thanks for the input. Enjoy the hot chocolate, I love hot chocolate in my coffee in the mornings.

ladyjogger31's picture
Posts: 291
Joined: Mar 2008

Dear Bonnie, I am crying and also heartbroken at your posting. You are such an inspiration to me. I pray that you will find the Strength of the Lord to stay strong. Your tough spirit and faith will see you through. And we'll be lifting you up in prayer every moment. Enjoy your Christmas with no chemo.
Hugs and Prayers,

lindachris's picture
Posts: 175
Joined: Aug 2007

Hi Bonnie,

I've had my own little menu of challenges in life and haven't been to the board in a while. But I'm glad I checked. So sorry to hear the challenges you are having. We know news like that is tough to square with the alternatives and all. I'll put in a prayer that your doctors find some solutions.

God Bless.


Posts: 1223
Joined: Jun 2008

Dearest Bonnie, I'm saddened to hear your news. I know how hard this must be hitting you, and my heart is breaking for you. My prayer is for you to find strength and peace, and they can find another chemo that will work for you. You are my hero.
Many prayers and hugs,

PS I hope you don't mind me asking, what type of cancer, and what stage do you have? I couldn't find that in your postings, although it may be there some where.

Posts: 650
Joined: Mar 2003


You're such a trooper! Your message of hope shines through your message about your situation. Hopefully, your doc will get the Nexavar to try.

I hope your Christmas and New Year are peaceful and joyous. I will keep you in my heart and prayers.


Posts: 35
Joined: May 2005

You truly have been right up there for me as someone I have admired. How many do you think you have helped, well you have helped me, and I have helped others and that is just from me. I am from central Illinois and I guess I have hundreds that have been inspired by my attitued. But beleive me, first God and Bonnie is up there too. I will continue to pray for you and Gods will. I dont know you, but I love you.
Thank you for all you do for us and God bless you.
I will continue to look for you and your inspiration.

Posts: 163
Joined: Aug 2005

Dearest Bonnie,

This sure isn't the news any of us want to hear! I so hope that you will get to try the new chemo. I've always thought that you and your doctor make a great team. He keeps looking and trying new ideas, and why wouldn't he with such an inspirational and strong patient! Like others have said here on this forum, I sure wish that more money was put into ovarian cancer research. I guess our numbers just aren't up there with some of the other female cancers. I keep hoping for all of us that soon a new drug will come on the market right out of trials, and it will be like Taxol has been early on for most of us. I must add my name to your long list of fans! What a inspiration you are to all of us! With lots of love and hugs, MM

lindachris's picture
Posts: 175
Joined: Aug 2007

Years ago when my wife Linda first was diagnosed with ovarian cancer, I decided to set up a Google search on the subject. For years I've received updates about new cancer treatments for ovarian. I have to tell you that there seems to be progress. Not every aspect of it is encouraging, but much of it is. For instance, it appears there are "splits" in the types of cancer. But that means they can better identify how to treat these different strains. So while it is discouraging that the disease is multifaceted, it is encouraging that researchers are finding ways to identify what they're working on.

It seems like we're all part of a big experiment, unfortunately. Getting one kind of chemo over another may not be as exacting a science as we hope. That's why sometimes those of us who go through a recurrence and wind up getting a "different type" actually experience success to some degree. While others may have had success with the first type, and not so much the second. Then there are the side effects. My wife's feet are still totally numb. She wrestles with memory sometimes. You are all so brave and supportive of each other. That's what gets everyone through. Talk about a "real" community. You're it, folks. God love you all.


BonnieR's picture
Posts: 1549
Joined: Jan 2004

Thank you so much for all the kindness you share, not just with me but for each other. Warms the heart to recieve so many warm fuzzies through you all. We are quite a group huh ~ Teal Warriors banding together to help each of with this journey we are on. I know you help me through the obstacles, bumps and even make the smooth paths more enjoyable. :-) Yup great traveling companions in this life. God bless you all! Buckets of teal hugs n prayers Bonnie

Posts: 485
Joined: Sep 2006

Well this was not the news we were hoping on is it?? I'm so sorry and my heart is breaking for you right now. Although even through all this bad news you still show strength and determination to win this battle. I just know you will. I will keep you and your Onc's in prayer maybe they will find the magic bullet you need very soon. You have always been right there helping us all when the whole time fighting the beast yourself. You have given me lots of hope when I felt hopeless and scared. I will hold you up in prayer and ask for peace for you as well. (((hugz)))~~Joanne

carol2dogs's picture
Posts: 135
Joined: Mar 2008

Like everyone else, my heart is also breaking for you. You have been such an inspiration to me and to all of us on this board. What I do know is that if anyone can beat this beast, you can. I have no clue as to how, but have faith that you will find a way (you and your docs).
Our prayers are certainly with you. God will take care of you, in His own way.
I hope you get to have a pain-free and joyous Christmas!

Posts: 45
Joined: Oct 2008

Bonnie, I'm so sorry to hear your news- it must be devastating. I'm sending you good thoughts and thinking of you often. I did want to give you some info on some new biotech drugs that are in phase I, II and III trials. Maybe there is one that you and your doctor might consider. I found a list of about 15 drugs on http://ovariancancer.about.com. They are listed under the section "New Ovarian Cancer Biotech Pipeline". The doctor who writes this blog seems to be very credible and has some good info. The drugs are listed along with phone numbers for more info. You can probably also look these up on the net. I sincerely hope that one of these can help you or anybody else who is reading this. Hang in there, Bonnie!


BonnieR's picture
Posts: 1549
Joined: Jan 2004

Hey Kathy, thanks I will take a look. I am doing well and waiting with anticipation and joy for Christmas. What a wonderful time of the year. Hugs Bonnie

umaof6's picture
Posts: 25
Joined: Mar 2008

I haven't checked in for a while and like everybody else, I am saddened by the news. I pray for you and the other ladies here. I also pray that the doctors, science and technology will be able to find a cure for all cancer soon.
You are such an inspiration as so many others have already stated. Hang in there! I wish you and you family a Blessed and joyful Christmas.

Love and prayers, Carol

"Teal warriors"! I like that!

saundra's picture
Posts: 1390
Joined: Mar 2007

I pray the spirit of Christmas warms you and gives you peace. Hang on as there are new things coming, and we "Teal Warriors" are praying and pulling for you on your next course of action. (((Hugs and Prayers))

Cindy54's picture
Posts: 454
Joined: Aug 2006

Bonnie, I have followed you for quite awhile and I am heartbroke at this news. Each time I have ever posted, you were one of the first to ever respond. I can only send my best prayers your way and hope that you receive all the right kind of help you need. I wish you peace and hope this Christmas. God Bless you Bonnie...hugs, Cindy

BonnieR's picture
Posts: 1549
Joined: Jan 2004

Wow, you all blow me away with all your posts and warm responses, my regular email signature line is "The winds of Grace are always blowing, just make sure you raise the sails."

You all have sure increased them winds of Grace ~ what an amazing awesome wonderful group.

I pray your stockings were full of good tidings, warm fuzzies, unexpected surprises and yes a miracle or two. Sending buckets of Teal ♥ Hugs N Prayers Bonnie

Posts: 277
Joined: Sep 2007

Bonnie - I too have not been on the message boards for a while as my body & mind are so tired, and I've not even had a recurrence. You have been such an inspiration - I always look for your name on the board so I can see how you are doing or what advice you have to give. Your enthusiasm for life, miracles, faith and supporting each and every one of us just continues to amaze me. I struggle with wondering if I can/could make it through another round of this - would I be doing it for myself or for all of those around me that love me and don't want me to leave their lives? I struggle with that question almost daily. But you are out there blazing the trail, trying everything, giving us information, sending out hope and it makes me feel great knowing that you keep on doing your thing. You are the best.

I hope your holiday was as joyful as you wished and your stocking was full of good things. I send you hugs, prayers and well wishes.


BonnieR's picture
Posts: 1549
Joined: Jan 2004

Hi Kris, thanks for the note and adding warm fuzzies to my christmas sock. :-) I think we do it for both ~ ourselves adn others. There are days if it was just me, I'd stop and sometimes these are lots of days. But my hubby wants me here as long as he can have me and my kids still don't acknowledge I am getting sicker and think I can beat it(I am honest with how my disease is progressing again) and then my grandkids, it is the grandkids I am selfish about, I want them to know me and have me in their lives as long as I can possibly give them. I want to see them grow up and leave as many memories for them as possible. So see it is for both, me and them. Love Bonnie

Susan523's picture
Posts: 235
Joined: Oct 2007

Bonnie, I, like the others, am very disheartened after reading your post. You ARE so special, and you make everybody else feel special, too.

Question: Has your Dr. ever mentioned IP Chemo? I had IP Chemo w/Cisplatin; 5 treatments. After the 5th treatment, my CA was at 3.5, but I'm sad to say it's now returned again. But I wonder if this one might work for you? It's pretty harsh (side effects), but maybe worth a try (?) Generally it puts most women into a 2-2 1/2 year remission. It involves a stomach port, and putting the Cisplatin directly into the abdomen (overnight at the hospital for each treatment). The bed is then rotated to saturate and distribute the abdomen directly w/chemo.

I am praying for you, as I also am praying for every lady on this site and around the world, who are enduring this horrible illness.

Hang in there; enjoy New Year's, and let's hope that 2009 brings only good things to us and our "teal sisters".

~Susan xoxo

BonnieR's picture
Posts: 1549
Joined: Jan 2004

Hi Susan, The U only gives IP to newly diagnosed after surgery. They feel it is too hard once you have all the adhesions and such. I was exited when IP was first available ~ but guess not for me. I know it is helping others beat this disease and live longer. Thanks for the suggestion though as you just never know how your post can help others and give hope or strength. Buckets of Teal Thanks for answering. :-) Hugs N Prayers Bonnie

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