whirlwind

Recap: Mom dx '07 stage iv colon cancer. Surgeries: colon resection, omentectomy, ovaries removed, possible mets to liver and lungs. 12 rounds of folfox + avastin. CT scan, disease stable, 8 rounds of 5FU leucov + avastin. CEA began to rise, ordered pet scan. Pet scan, no lung nodules, no metastatic disease to liver, abdomen unchanged since last november, and suspicious activity on thyroid. We were sceduled to see an ENT last Monday. Two Mondays ago doc added campostar. Violent reaction,kidney failure, dropped white blood cell count (under 2), dropped red blood cell count, neutropenic fever, mouth sores, 5 day hospitalization got out yesterday. I learned yesterday that another man who received chemo at the same time as mom, mixed by the same nurse, ended up in the hospital as well only to be told that he had been given a lethal dosage of chemo, enough for a 700lb man and he was a mere 220lbs. He too had kidney failure, and the list of symptoms my mom had. I'm not suggesting that this is what happened to my mom because I am not a doctor nor did the doctors at the hospital where she was admitted do a toxicology report and she got better, well enough to get discharged after five days anyway. I am suggesting that the practice where she was a patient is not up to par.

After much thought and prayer, I made the decision to seek care at a major cancer center asap because I do not feel that she is getting the care she deserved. Today, I made phone calls and spoke to several representatives at major cancer center within driving distance and got my mom an appointment two weeks from Monday (despite a waiting list). I think that my prayers were answered. If anything at least she will be seen by a whole team of doctors and not just one oncologist and will get a thorough (2nd opinion) evaluation. I wish that I had acted sooner but the way that this has fallen into place over the past week seems as if it was meant to be this way. There are too many unexplained coincidences that have aided my actions and decisions. I really can feel the prayers that are being said for both myself and my mom. I have had a surreal sense of peace enter my life and this is not something that I can explain.

Everyone here on this board is so unselfish. I am my mom's caretaker, advocate, amongst other things and usually when I ask for prayers those of you who respond always include me and remind me to take care of myself too. I can't thank you enough for that. Us caretakers would move heaven and earth for our loved ones and it's hard to even talk to someone who isn't aware of what a cancer diagnosis of a family member can do to your life. I hope you all are well today and know that I continue to hold you all in my thoughts and prayers.