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Dating and being a cancer surviror

Posts: 5
Joined: Oct 2008

I am 35, female and single. I have just finished chemotherapy which i went through for 6 months, for stage 3 cc. I am interested in whether there are other single people out there who have faced issues when dating? I would hate to feel that having had cancer puts people off dating me, but the reality is there may be people who are scared of dating a survivor.

Has anyone had positive dating/ relationship expereices they can share? I am determined to feel positive about this aspect of my life...but at this stage feeling a bit uncertain and unsure about how to go about it. Finding a special someone is a really important thing for me.
How do I best deal with it? I feel positive about my survival...I just hope other people will too!!!

Thanks for your comments/advice

lfondots63's picture
Posts: 822
Joined: Jan 2006


Well, I'm going through a divorce and understand what you are saying. I'm a little older then you (44) but not too old. LOL. I have been dating for about 1 year. I actually don't tell anyone about my survivorship until I feel that the person is someone I want to continue seeing. Unfortunately you have to see quite a few people until you find one like this. The guys I have told seem fine with it. I'm actually seeing someone now who is a hospice nurse so he totally understands which is wonderful. Good Luck and if they can't take you as a whole package, you don't need them. There are so many people these days 'living' with cancer that I would be suprised if the person you think might have a problem with your telling them DOESN'T know someone that has some form of cancer.

Lisa F.

Buzzard's picture
Posts: 3073
Joined: Aug 2008

What makes you any different than anyone else? Your are a very caring person and a very determined person, not that I know you but because you are a survivor and cancer survivors are very special people. They for the most part have a very different outlook on life, they enjoy every moment, they never take anything for granted, they are very sincere in what they do and say for they know how precious life is from experience. They know how easy life can be taken away and by surviving they rise above the disease a new being, superlative to their prior self, and perfect to bloom in a relationship because of what they have suffered through gave them new life and a purpose for it. I am married but if I were to ever divorce I would find a cancer survivor to settle with, for they all are sincere because they have nothing to lose and everything to gain....Cancer Survivors are extra special sensory individuals, if you don't believe it just ask one of us. We notice the small singular blades of grass as others just look at their yards. We see the single honeysuckle flower as others see the complete vine. We get pleasure out of the simplest things in life where it takes others major plans just to smile. Have you ever walked out on the porch in the early morning with a cup of coffee and told the Lord how beautiful his earth is. I am here to tell you that I bet 90% of cancer survivors have, including myself. Dating as a survivor for you will give someone out there the opportunity to meet probably the best catch they will ever find, and its because of what we endure to get where we are, we know what real problems can be and we don't sweat the small stuff, cause everything is small stuff......good luck girlfriend, get out there among them and hold that head up, you will make someone very happy.

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