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OUT OF HOSPITAL

FRANTIC
Posts: 106
Joined: Nov 2004

Hi everyone. I started on erbitux and oxiplatinum 2 weeks ago adter the re-occurance developed in my\both lungs and in the skull. After 1 week I developed the severe acne on my fast as well as shingles on my left leg and left butt. I am beside myself. After I read everybodys posts and what they are going thru I try to remain strong to fight this disease. But I was told it is not curable but only might slow it down. These constant obstacles are too much for me. What next. My next treatment is Friday with the erbitux along withe the xeloda. I am not a fighter
any more. I don't know how much I can take amymore. Your friend Fran

Kristi63
Posts: 1
Joined: Sep 2007

Dear Fran, Thank you for being so honest about your feelings. It is difficult facing something that is not curable. I hope you are able to talk with your doctor/nurse. Is the treatment for the shingles working and making you more comfortable? You are a fighter, you just don't realize it, otherwise you wouldn't have asked what is next. Yes, these obstacles are too much for you and I am praying for you right now that you will have peace and the strength to get through each trial. God is knocking on your door. He wants to be with you right now. Will you let him in? Your friend Kristi63

vinny3's picture
vinny3
Posts: 933
Joined: Jun 2006

Dear Fran,

I'm sorry to hear of your difficulties but happy to see that you are posting. We worry when we don't hear from you. Of course you are a fighter. You have been fighting along a very difficult road for some time. Did they give you medicine to cut the shingles short? It usually lessens the pain from it as well. While they tell you your diseas is not curable just remember- as long as one takes a breath there is hope.

Hang in there. Our prayers are for you to become painfree and there to be a lessening , and resolution, of your disease.

Dick

hopefulone
Posts: 1048
Joined: Jan 2007

Hi Fran, you ARE a fighter, you just dont' realize it. The rash from the erbitux is common from what I've read and many people say that the rash is a sign it's working. As for the non curable part, only God has the power to cure so unless your doc's have spoken with God I wouldn't hold that to be Gospel. As Dick says, as long as you draw a breath there is hope. God Bless
Diane

Betsydoglover's picture
Betsydoglover
Posts: 1256
Joined: Jul 2005

Hi Fran -

I am sorry for all the trouble you are having, but please realize 2 things:

1) as others have said, you ARE a fighter. You may not realize it, or may be too depressed to realize it, but you are fighting even as we speak.

2) Don't listen to that "incurable" stuff! Stage IV CRC is "officially" "incurable". That shouldn't stop us - there is a big difference between what happens to us as individuals and what the (old) statistics say. SO keep thinking "CURE".

Also, slowing down growth makes way for a couple of things; 1) new drugs and treatments are being developed and one or more of them may help you and 2) old drugs may work again after some time off.

Fran, I know you have had a tough battle with this disease, but it is tough for all of us. There are many people here who are supporting you and you need to keep coming back for that support.

I hope the docs can help with your shingles - the Eribitux rash is supposed to mean it is being effective.

Take care,
Betsy

kbienapfl's picture
kbienapfl
Posts: 61
Joined: Sep 2006

Fran, it's okay to be scared and frustrated. We all question our ability to fight after receiving difficult news. We know and understand the emotional energy that needs to be pulled up from within. We are here for you and sending positive energy your direction.

I'm right with you sister! You are not alone and you are a fighter. Sometimes these things need 24 hours. Give it time...you will rally.

apache4's picture
apache4
Posts: 272
Joined: Jul 2007

First of all, I am so glad you posted as I have been thinking and praying about you. I "ditto" Betsydoglover. They said I was incurable also and now have a PET scan that shows all tumors dead except for one small one. Miracles do happen! When I look back, I wonder how I got through the constant chemo, but am sure glad I did. You are a wonderful fighter. I can't imagine going through all you have...shingles are just awful, huh? I got them after my hysterectomy and it was worse then the surgery! Hang in there girl, we all love you.

jerseysue's picture
jerseysue
Posts: 626
Joined: Oct 2005

Hang in there! I'm sending good vibes your way.

alta29's picture
alta29
Posts: 435
Joined: Mar 2005

Fran:
I understand you, because I felt the same after my recurrance..I remember telling my husband after surgery that I could not go throu this again...4 months after and been NED i know I will fight it again if the idiot decides to come back ( but is NOT going to happen )I will pray for you tonight so God can give you some strength to keep fighting it....dont give up
Love, believe and God bless
Ileana

goldfinch's picture
goldfinch
Posts: 737
Joined: Oct 2003

Fran,
You are indeed a fighter. Look at you go at this thing! I never had trouble with a rash from the erbitux, and it never worked. I think a bad rash from it is a sign that it is working for you. Hang in there! As others have said, you are buying time, until the right drug comes along. Whatever works until then!
Will be thinking of you this Friday!
Mary

rmap59
Posts: 266
Joined: Jun 2007

Hi Fran,
Boy, what a deck of cards. But you know what you can play that deck of cards and win. Praying for your pain to subside and positive thoughts enter your mind and heart. May God Bless and keep you. Robin

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