in remission

sandramc Member Posts: 1
edited March 2014 in Lung Cancer #1
In 2004 I was diagnoised with lung cancer. I had an operation, chemo, and radiation. My husband thought that I would die. Well I did not and he became very unsuportative through the chemo, and radiation. etc. He says that I am not the same person as I was before. Well I have part of my lung gone and can no longer run up and down stairs. Cut trees down and hull away brush. So I left him. I now only have to look after my house and dogs. Has anyone else incountered a spouse that would sooner see you dead than have to put up with a women that is not the same work horse after lung cancer. Don't get me wrong I have also got a new and great life as a survivor. I still drive a school bus and pay my bills. I refuse to die. Just curious does anyone else have a husband that would sooner see you dead than alive.


  • handle
    handle Member Posts: 31
    Hi, I just have to respond to you about what you have gone thru. Don't feel alone ,there are many cancer patients who go thru this, a lot of people don't respect the wedding vows of , Till Death Do Us Part, or For Better or Worse, it is disheartening but you have to get on with your life and put him in the past. Fighting this damn disease is hard enough let alone a non-supportive mate. I went thru something of the same with my brothers and sisters, three of them said I was faking SCLC , and offered no support or help what-so-ever, it did hurt at the time but I have gotten on with my life and know that it will come full circle for them someday. You have to let these people go and get on with your life, it is too short to waste on them, live your life to the fullest and they will be punished for thier misdoings, believe me. They have to look into the mirror and see themselves for what they are. Well, I know this was not a silver bullet that cured all of your hurt but please let it go and live your life to the fullest, you know now what is important and what is not. God Bless Mike
  • debber216
    debber216 Member Posts: 12
    Hi Sandramc,
    Unfortunately, what has happened to you is not uncommon, I have heard/read quite a few survivors with the same story. What is weird is, most all of the stories is, it's the Husband/man. The Women seem to be standing by their man, no matter what! I'm sure there are a few exceptions to the rule, but for the most part, it's the men who can't seem to handle the stress. I think alot of it is the Woman's lot in life as the "care giver" of the family. And when that changes and the Woman needs a little help and support, it's all over but the shout'in! I'm so sorry that this has happened to you. But hopefully you'll find someone that really appreciates you as you deserve! Take care. Prayers and hugs. Deb
  • CHG
    CHG Member Posts: 34
    sandramc You go girl and keep on goin'. I love your attitude.
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