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My Dad Passed Away

deneenb
Posts: 130
Joined: Jun 2004

It is with much sadness that I am writing these words. My Dad passed away early Saturday morning. He had been on Hospice care at home for about a month and we saw the decline during that time. Friday morning we saw very definite signs of decline. My mother, sister and I spent every minute with him, in 20 minute shifts, from Friday morning until he passed on Saturday and we were all with him then. He woke up several times during the night and he understood what we would say to him but he couldn't really talk to us. He did ask my mother at one point what was the matter and weakly put his arm around her. He nodded his head when I asked if he knew how much I loved him. My Uncle passed away on Tuesday and I believe that he hung around waiting for my Dad and then my gradmother came for both of them. I miss him so much already and I hate this disease for what it did to him. My Dad was only 62 and this disease took so much away from him and my family.

I pray for everyone on this board and thank you all for the support over the last 3 years.

Best Wishes,
Deneen

goldfinch's picture
goldfinch
Posts: 737
Joined: Oct 2003

Deneen,
My deepest condolences for the loss of your dad and your uncle.
May the good memories that you created and shared with them sustain you through this difficult time.
I like to think that there is one star up above that my dad (passed away in 1978) rests in and looks over me from. Gives me support.
You are in my prayers.
Mary

betina61's picture
betina61
Posts: 644
Joined: Aug 2006

So sorry to hear the sad news,but I can see that your father died in peace and surrounded by the love of his family,you know that he is in a wonderful place now, and he will be looking after you from heaven.

betina61's picture
betina61
Posts: 644
Joined: Aug 2006

So sorry to hear the sad news,but I can see that your father died in peace and surrounded by the love of his family,you know that he is in a wonderful place now, and he will be looking after you from heaven.

kmygil
Posts: 881
Joined: Feb 2007

You and your family are in my prayers. God Bless.

jams67's picture
jams67
Posts: 927
Joined: May 2006

Deneen,
I'm so very sorry. Oviously, he was a man who was loved by his family. That is a better gift than any other. He will be remembered.

I think this came from Kathie on this site. I loved it, and I hope it helps.

Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there; I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints on snow,
I am the sun on ripened grain,
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there; I did not die.

Kanort's picture
Kanort
Posts: 1275
Joined: Jan 2004

Dear Deneen,

I am so sorry to learn of your father's passing. Your father was a very special man....even in his last days trying to comfort others. My prayers are with you and your family as you learn to live life without your father's presence. Please know that his spirit lives on and will guide you in your future. Please find comfort in knowing what a wonderful advocate you were for him.

Please don's leave this site. You are a part of us.

With sympathy,

Kay

Limey's picture
Limey
Posts: 447
Joined: Mar 2004

Deneenb, I am so sorry for your loss. What a blessing it must have been for your father to be surrounded by the ones he loves. what a nice gift you all gave to him. I hope hes good memories are imprinted into your minds eye.
Look for the peace and the blessings.
Limey

dash4
Posts: 304
Joined: Dec 2005

Deneen,
I am so sorry for your loss.It is comforting to know your dad was able to share his final days with his family...what a special memory for you. I cannot imagine how you must feel at this moment though. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
Dash

KathiM's picture
KathiM
Posts: 8077
Joined: Aug 2005

Deneen,

Oh, sweet soul, I am sending soft hugs.

After the loss of my friend to brain cancer, I found comfort that helped when my daughter passed.

Your dad is not gone. He has just shifted. From in front of your eyes, into your heart, where he will live on forever.

I found myself saying something to a grieving father after losing his 13 year old to cancer..."You may think I'm a loon, and I can't back it up with any solid proof, but I KNOW she is in a happier place. It's soft, and peaceful, and full of joy".

Please accept my warmest hugs,

Kathi

robinvan's picture
robinvan
Posts: 1014
Joined: May 2007

Hi Deneen,
So sorry to hear about your Dad's death. Thank you for sharing the story of his final moments with us. I found it very moving. I'm glad you were all able to be with him at home, it sounds like it was very peaceful.
I wish you and your family every blessing as you make final arrangements and begin to remember your Dad and celebrate his life.
Peace and Blessings... Rob

jenalynet's picture
jenalynet
Posts: 363
Joined: Nov 2005

I am very sorry to read about your loss. I am glad to hear that you and your family were able to comfort your father , I will keep you in my prayers. Audrey

jsabol's picture
jsabol
Posts: 1156
Joined: Dec 2003

(((((Deneen))))) I am so sorry to hear of your dad's passing; I lost my dad to this disease after his 2 year battle. I was so grateful that hospice was able to help him and us through that difficult final passage.
May he rest in peace and may your memories fly to the good times. With sympathy to your family, Judy

jerseysue's picture
jerseysue
Posts: 626
Joined: Oct 2005

I am sorry for your loss and my thoughts are with you and your family.

kangatoo's picture
kangatoo
Posts: 2115
Joined: Feb 2004

Dear Deneen. Jen and I offer our sincerest condolences. We hope that in some way your family here at CSN has comforted you during this horrid ordeal. Your father is in the arms of many of our loved ones and friends who have passed on.
Look for the "rainbow" Deneen.........your fathers love is always there.
Kanga

kathleenss's picture
kathleenss
Posts: 49
Joined: Nov 2006

I am so sorry. When we lose a parent, no matter our age, we are lost children. He was comforted by the presence of all of you during that time and by your love. Now you can be comforted somewhat by the knowledge of his love. My prayers are with you.
Kathleen

traci43's picture
traci43
Posts: 775
Joined: Jul 2007

Deneen - I'm so sorry to hear about your Dad. It's hard to lose a parent. My grandmother passed away after a long illness (heart-releated) and it was sad to see her decline. Rest assured that those memories will fade and you'll soon remember all the good times with your Dad. Mt thoughts are with you, Traci

sladich's picture
sladich
Posts: 430
Joined: May 2007

My deepest sympathy to you and your family. No words can heal the pain you must be feeling. Take comfort in knowing that people care.

Debbie

2bhealed's picture
2bhealed
Posts: 2085
Joined: Dec 2001

Deneen,

I am so very sorry for you and your family--especially for the double loss. It's a tough ride those last months. I hope you all will find some comfort in the time ahead. If you ever want to "talk" about the death feel free to email me here. I understand.

peace, emily

spongebob's picture
spongebob
Posts: 2599
Joined: Apr 2003

Deneen -

So sorry to hear about your dad. I know you were always there for him and I am sure he knew that, too. Now he can always be there for you.

May God grant you and your family strength during this difficult time. Know that your dad is in a much better place.

Be well

- SpongeBob

themis01
Posts: 168
Joined: Feb 2005

Deneen-
I am so truly sorry and have been hoping that I would not read the words that you write about your dad. As you know my mom died at 62 also and much in the same way. It is a cruel and terrible disease that I hate with a passion. Hang in there with your mom and remember the good stuff as much as possible. I am so so so sorry.
Erika

Anonymous user (not verified)

Deneen, there are no words that can take away the pain so I won't bother with the "words" and I miss my mother terribly every single day, even though it's been almost two years since she passed, but that's exactly what she did, she passed, as did your father, and neither one of them died...they moved on and especially into our hearts. Strong, true love never dies and that is the heart and soul of each and every single one of us. Look to the heavens and every time you see a twinkling star, that's your father looking out for you. Talk to him...sometimes they answer quite clearly for into your head pops out of nowhere exactly what your father would say. Small words of comfort, I know, for a loss that hurts so bad. I'm truly so very sorry. Monika

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