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In remission and scared

Posts: 1
Joined: May 2007

I was diagnosed with NHL stage II B cell follicular when I was 45. I did 6 rounds of R-CHOP and I believe I went into remission almost immediately. The very fist treatment of Rituxan I had no pain and the chemo was not as bad as I thought but I don't want to do it again ! My doctor did not give me maintanence Rituxan. Since my cancer is follicular I am not considered cured (I didn't find this out until last year) I am having trouble enjoying life because I am scared that the cancer will return. Everywhere I turn someone is fighting cancer, my son in law died of a rare cancer last year and it was awful. I just am looking for some emotional support. I would appreciate your help. Thanks.

peppi's picture
Posts: 5
Joined: Jul 2006

I was diagnosed with Hodgkins Disease Jan. 06 I'm 46yrs old. I had 12 treatments of (ABVD)Chemo & 20 Radiation treatments. Have you ever considered joining a support group with other people with Cancer that you can chat with. Keep yourself positive. Hugs & Prayers. Peppi

Plymouthean's picture
Posts: 264
Joined: Jan 2004

I was dx'd with NHL,stage 2, last November. I was given R-CHOP chemo, and after three treatments, I went into remission.
While no one with NHL can be considered cured, it is very significant that the quicker one goes into remission, the longer the interval between recurrence, if in fact it does recur. My oncologist tells me that it is not unusual for remission to go on for ten years or more.
Your remission occurred quickly, so you have that advantage, - plus, with the research going on, who knows what discoveries will be made before any possible recurrence in your case.
I am also a five (plus) year survivor of lung cancer (unrelated). I was originally dx'd as incurable/inoperable, but here I am, alive and kickin'. My best advice to you is to have a positive attitude and get on with living a normal(?) life. NHL be damned! Don't let the paranoia, which is normal in all cancer survivors, upset your life. Based on the above, cross that bridge when you come to it, - IF you do come to it.
My best wishes and prayers for a long, happy future for you.

kenzie_jw2001's picture
Posts: 2
Joined: Dec 2006

I am 21yrs old and was diagnosed with hodgkins lymphoma stage 2b when i was 19. I've been in remission for a year now, but I still have scans every 3 months. Everytime I go to get my scans Iam terrified! For the first few months I was in remission, I thought daily, about will it come bk? If it does I can't go through treatment again, I won't it's to hard. Now after a yr I don't worry so much. I was tired of being afraid to live! I do my check ups and hope for the best each time. I know it's hard, but life is hard in general. So my advice is to talk to someone your close with about your fears, and let there reasurance comfort you. I hope some of this helped you. stay strong!!! lots of love kenzie.

dpomroy's picture
Posts: 136
Joined: Dec 2000

I was diagnosed with Hodgkins in 2000, went through all the chemo and radiation treatments. I wasn't worried about it coming back because Hodgkins has a high cure rate BUT it DID come back! I knew this time how to navigate the system and battle my way through it. I had a stem cell transplant and am cancer free today.

I know that my philosophy is probably strange sounding but it works for me...Cancer probably will get me someday, but not today! What am I going to do with each bonus day? Who am I going to make smile? What new thing am I going to brave enough to try? What old grudge am I going to forgive? I am going to do the best with what I am given, every day of it.

It's not that I never worried! But worrying never changed an outcome. So I try to shove it out of my mind, and focus on what I can do something about.

Posts: 2
Joined: Aug 2007

I was diagnosed with Hodgkins in October of 2006 when I was 15 weeks pregnant. I did 6 treatments of ABVD while pregnant, had my little boy (who is healthly and perfect!), waited a month and did another 6. I opted not to do radiation since everything I read told me I was basically guaranteeing myself breast cancer in 10-15 years if I did. My mass was the size of a softball in the center of my chest - that coupled with my age and increased hormones from pregnancy made the radiation idea too scary. I finished treatment in April of this year and was told I was in remission. Within 2 weeks I was feeling a lot better without a pregnancy and chemo to drag me down!

In June I started feeling exhausted again and experiencing weird things like coughing that wouldn't go away, intense hives all over my body, inability to concentrate, etc. They ran a lot of tests and told me that they thought it was just residual side effects from chemo.

When I had my 3 month scan in July there was a small spot 1.5 centimeters in my chest that wasn't there before. Because of the location it is too small to biopsy so I was told to wait. Then 2 weeks ago I found an enlarged lymphnode over my collar bone. Basically we are playing a waiting game to see what the lymphnode over my collar bone does. If it gets bigger we biopsy. My oncologist put me on a round of antibiotics to see if the lymphnode will get smaller even though I have no other symptoms of infection. My oncologist has been very kind and concerned. He is like a little mother hen to me. I want to believe him when he tells me that it is more likely that all of this is from other causes rather than a recurrence of the Hodgkins but at this point I'm not convinced. My husband is the only person who knows about this...I can't bring myself to tell my friends and family - getting them all worked up when it could just be an infection. Am I going to feel like a hypochondriac for the rest of my life?

Posts: 1
Joined: May 2007

Dear Ravencake1

Don't be scared. I had non-hodgkins 20 yrs ago and was given 3 mths when the chemo and radiation didn't work. Don't believe what others tell you. It is important to tune in to your own inner voice and let God guide you through this. You don't suffer alone with your fears and side effects; God is with you always. If you find it hard to believe in God, finding meaning to your life - what is most important for you, will replace your fears. Also self positive talk is necessary and imagery (imagining what you are doing years from now) and exercise. Walking is great but you have to work up a sweat to make a difference to your health. Keep positive and go and do the things you enjoy. All the best. Koala

Posts: 3
Joined: Jul 2007

Hi. I do not have cancer, but my father who is 54 years old was dx with NHL stage 1 diffuse B cell I believe last year when he was 53. He went through about 6 or 8 rounds of chemo and got the rituxin shot each time. He immediately went into remission as well. His last pet scan came back completely clean and from now on his oncologist said that he just has to get a ct scan every 3 months. Lately, my father has seemed different. My mom and I talked and she told me that my father is very afraid that the cancer is going to come back, or be found all over his body. He is afraid that he will only live at the most 5 more years. He is afraid that he will not get to see my 14 month old daughter grow up. Hearing that about my father made me very upset. I am very close to both my parents and am in no way ready for either of them to leave me. Reading your post, I know see my father is not alone in his fears. I wish that he would get on the internet to one of these sites or join a support group, but I do not think he would do it. He told my mother that his feelings were something that he had to deal with on his own. But I am afraid that his negative feelings will influence the cancer to come back. He was very positive and optimistic throughout his treatments, and I believed that helped him. I know that once you have been dx with cancer, there is always a chance for it to recur or be found someewhere else, but like my father you both are younger when it was found, responded to treatment and went into remission immediately. I think that improves the chances of your prognosis. When my dad first went to the oncologist and asked him what his prognosis was and outlook the doctor told him they were going for a cure. My dad has had co workers die of cancer recently and family friends also. He said its like everywhere you turn people are dying of cancer. He also reads the obituaries constantly. Someone told him that he needs to stop doing that and that he also needs to read Romans in the bible. My father has told me that he believes in God, but we have never gone to church as a family. I came home and found him reading Romans the other night and I asked him what he was doing and he said that was between him and the lord. Maybe you could read that also. I don't know if it helped him or not, but you could try. Your situation seems very similar to my fathers. I pray for him everyday and now I will pray for you and all the others out there fighting cancer. It is a horrible disease. My grandmother on my moms side died of lung cancer when I was only 11, while I knew her, it is hard for me to really remember her because I was so young when she passed away. She was only 59 or 60 when she died. I don't want that to happen to my little girl with my dad. He adores her. Stay strong and remember there are people out there that are having the same feelings as you, stay positive and never give up the fight!

Anonymous user (not verified)

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Posts: 14
Joined: Aug 2013

Hi there!

Enjoy your life, you have been given a second chance.

You are in remission and life is good.

Worries will stress you and that is not good for your health.

God Bless


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