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Getting more anxious.....

betina61's picture
Posts: 644
Joined: Aug 2006

Hi everyone! I finished my 12 treatments 2 weeks ago,and met with the oncologist to schedule the scans,I will have a pet scan and ct scan both the same day next Weds.and this coming monday I will meet with the surgeon that did my surgery to schedule the colonoscopy,I have been very positive during all these months, but yesterday I had some rectal bleeding,without having a B.M.During this last 6 months it happened to me twice but after having a B.M.and I have told the Dr.and he wasn't concern, maybe because I told him that I do have hemorroids, anyway last night I had to have some sleeping pills because negative thouhts were bombarding my head,I am posting this because didn't want to tell my daughter not to worry her, probably the bleeding is cause by the hemorroids,but after having colon cancer you don't want to see blood coming from you know where.So I will need to calm down because even that the scans are going to be next Weds. the Dr. told me that the results will be ready in a week, when I meet with him, and the colonoscopy,I don't know yet when is going to be schedule.This is hard imagining to live with this worries every 3 months, I pray to God that he gives me peace, and please remember me in your prayers in the next 2 or 3 weeks,I love you all, you are now part of my family, I come to this site every single day and I feel so connected to all of you that is incredible. Lots of hugs, Betina

Posts: 20
Joined: Jan 2007

Hi Betina,
Though I am not in your shoes, I know how hard and how scary the waiting is. I've had so many sleepless nights, worrying about the worst things.
You've come to a great place for support and understanding. When you're feeling scared and anxious, it's OK to express it. Everyone has been there at one time or another. Just remember that you're strong.....you can do this. You have an incredible network of people that are wishing the best for you. You are in my prayers during this difficult time. I wish you peace and calm to help you through your days.

MCarr's picture
Posts: 20
Joined: Feb 2007

Your anxiety is completely normal. Even a normal Dr. visit has anxiety attached once you go through what you have been through. I will say that while the anxiety is still there for me, it has gotten easier to deal with over time. The colonoscopy should give an indication of the source of the bleeding. My thoughts and prayers will be with you and good reports will make the next visit easier.

spongebob's picture
Posts: 2598
Joined: Apr 2003

Oye, Betina! Calmate!

Was the blood bright red? If so probably a hemorhoid/fissure - anyway the doc will be checking you out real good in just a few days. You have spent 12 weeks kicking cancer's ***! What cancer cell could possibly live in that toxic bloodstream of yours? But a big Pina Colada de Puerto Rico hecho con Ron Barrilito solo te puede ayudar! No?

Keeping you in my prayers.

- SpongeBob

jams67's picture
Posts: 927
Joined: May 2006

What you are going through, the waiting, is very difficult. My cousin, though she doesn't have a history of cancer was hospitalized 2 weeks ago because she was having rectal bleeding, bright red blood. They gave her two transfusions, kept her over night, then told her to come back in a couple of weeks for a colonoscopy. They didn't seem too worried about it because they are assuming it is caused by a hemorhoid. I'm glad that your scans are all soon. Let us know the outcome. I will pray for you to have courage during this waiting period.

Posts: 106
Joined: Nov 2004

I perfectly know the feeeling of being anxious. Nothing is calming me down except for the people on this network. They are the ones who give comfort. I know how you feel. But you will be fine. Your friend Fran

betina61's picture
Posts: 644
Joined: Aug 2006

Thank you all of you for your response, as right now I feel peace again and much more positive, it helps a lot coming to this site.

nanuk's picture
Posts: 1362
Joined: Dec 2003

...there's a lot of power here..healing power.

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