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Such Sad News Today

Posts: 71
Joined: Mar 2006

Mary from WI here everyone...
Very sad and practically crying as I write this to you all.

But I do hope each and everyone of you are safe, happy, and well today and always! ;)

My mom has IV Stage Metastic Colon Cancer and behind her already she has: 3 surgeries, reverse colostomy, 8 months of the folfox treatment, remaining tumors in her liver and lungs.

Early this week she had a follow-up CT scan; and her oncon. called her tonite with the results.

The tumors in her liver and lungs "are growing again". And basically that's all "I" know right now. So, she is starting a new treatment on Monday.

WHY, WHY, WHY GOD????????????????????????????????
I am so sad, angry, and pissed off right now people I cannot even tell you!

OKAY... sorry, I'll calm down! I guess I just could really use some encouraging words right now so...

Sorry and thank you all - always!
Mary from WI

Posts: 166
Joined: Jul 2005

I'm so sorry to hear about your mom. I hope the new treatment helps. My dads liver mets have been stable for over a year now with his chemo so please have hope.
There are many treatments and chemos out there. Sometimes it may take a couple of trys to see what someone will respond too.

Good Luck,

Posts: 553
Joined: Mar 2006


I know the anger and frustration you are feeling right now. It is only normal to feel that way. Please do not give up hope. You and your mom are in my prayers.


KathiM's picture
Posts: 8077
Joined: Aug 2005

The answer is: 'Because'. I wondered the same thing when I was given the second dx in months...breast cancer...after beating the beast on the colon cancer.

I'm sad for you and for mom...I remember turning to one doctor and saying "I'm just so weary, please let it stop". And then picked myself up, brushed myself off, got REALLY ANGRY at the beast for being such a bully....

Hugs from a been there/done that....

chynabear's picture
Posts: 483
Joined: Jul 2005


I am so sorry to hear of the latest news.


Please, don't apologize for the way you feel or for expressing your feelings, especially here. Vent away, you deserve to!

The good news from your entire message is that there is still a fighting plan. Your mom can still pull a breath into her lungs and there are still options. As my Scuba instructor taught me many years ago, "Assess your situation. If you are still able to pull air into your lungs, if you are still able to breath, don't panic. You are still ok." As long as she is breathing, there is hope.

How wonderful you are. You are so caring about your mother, but even before you post about your situation, you are worried about all of us here! I'm praying that you and your family receive awesome results with the new treatment.



StacyGleaso's picture
Posts: 1250
Joined: Mar 2003

Hi Mary,

I am sorry to hear about your mom's recent set back. But it's just that, a setback. It's not fair, and it's very frustrating, but it needs to be detected in order to be treated. There is no reason why things happen to some, and not to others. I can only think that your mom is one strong cookie and is given this "test" to prove it once again.

I know it's hard, but stay strong. She is still here and you are here to help get her through this. As you know, things can always be worse, and we must cherish every day we are here.

Let me know if I can help,

katefm's picture
Posts: 112
Joined: Oct 2006

Hi Mary-

I'm new to the chat, but I wanted to tell you how sorry I am. I never understand why. It's not fair. My neighbor said something to me the other day that I thought was very good - when I told her that I thought only bad people should get cancer, she said "Well, I think so, too, but we also need stories of good people beating it out so that we can all have hope for the good guys." I believe that's true. I absolutely agree it's not fair, but I hope you and your Mom can persevere - it's totally worth it for good people to keep going.

Where are you in WI? We're just north of Milwaukee...

Monicaemilia's picture
Posts: 455
Joined: Nov 2006

Hi Mary - I know how you must feel, I'm stage IV and after 2 surgeries, 8 months of chemo, and a scheduled surgery date to resect my liver, I was told the day before surgery that there were spots in my lungs. At first I was truly devastated and thought 'what's the point?', but then I realized that this was just a setback that was not going along with my plan. I also found this great site where I everywhere I turned there are different stories with different endings and possibilities. So I decided to take control of my treatment (back on chemo), and still working towards surgery (that's what I told my oncologist). So take heart, the next chemo may be the right one for your mom. As long as there are choices, and we have breath, there is hope. Monica

scouty's picture
Posts: 1976
Joined: Apr 2004

Very well said Monica!!!!!! I love your last sentence and echo it!!!!

Lisa P.

vinny3's picture
Posts: 933
Joined: Jun 2006

It is not fair but then again we don't know why things happen but perhaps it is a higher power's plan. I was upset when I was told I had cancer. At first I thought, why me? Then I realized-why not me. I can fight it and will continue to do so as are the others on this board. There is always hope. Look not only at chemo but the other changes that can be made which can make a difference. We have at least several (Lisa P-Scouty, and Emily- 2bhealed) who made great changes in their lifestyle and diet and are now NED. Never give up hope.


nanuk's picture
Posts: 1363
Joined: Dec 2003

It is so frustrating to see all the people suffering from this disease, and all the dedicated professionals who must share these frustrations when their efforts fail..thank you, Dick, for your balanced comments. As long as this board exists,I have something to do other than waiting to die. As long as there is a sharing of information there is hope for a cure. Bud

JADot's picture
Posts: 720
Joined: Jan 2006

Hi Mary:

I can only guess at the devastation that you feel right now. At times like these, it is really really important to believe. It's not empty rhetoric - you have to believe to heal. I STRONGLY recommend Dr. Andrew Weil's book "Spontaneous Healing". It's a short book and it reads like a balm for a battle-fatigued soul. Please get one for your mom and help her to believe in hope and in healing again.


spongebob's picture
Posts: 2599
Joined: Apr 2003

Mary -

No need to be sorry for venting. That's what this board is all about! Sorry to hear about your mom's situation. Hopefully the new meds will produce some positive results.

I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.


betina61's picture
Posts: 644
Joined: Aug 2006

Mary I think you have received already very good advice from this site, but I just want you to know that you and your mother will be in my prayers, I am sure that the next treatment will have poitive results, PLEASE don't
loose hope

t loose hope.

Posts: 78
Joined: Jan 2005

I am so sorry. I very well know how it feels when they do everything that is asked and to feel that nothing is working. My husband was originally Stage III, and it seems that he has done everything by the book, and it is just not working.

My thoughts are with you, and keep going on the hope that this next treatment will be the one to attack the beast.


betina61's picture
Posts: 644
Joined: Aug 2006

Mary I think you have received already very good advice from this site, but I just want you to know that you and your mother will be in my prayers, I am sure that the next treatment will have poitive results, PLEASE don't
loose hope

t loose hope.

nudgie's picture
Posts: 1483
Joined: Sep 2006


Please do not give up on your Mom and keep faith. There are different types of chemo treatments for different types of cancer and not all treatments will work the same on everyone. Your Onc Doc had not given up, because he/she has already mentioned another regime.

Sending huges and kisses your way along with prayers

Kanort's picture
Posts: 1275
Joined: Jan 2004

Hi Mary,

I hope this finds you feeling better.

Never give up hope.

Always Believe,


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