Husband Diagnosed surgery this Thursday

Sam725
Sam725 Member Posts: 87 Member
edited March 2014 in Colorectal Cancer #1
Hi,
So glad I found this place. My husband was dx with colon cancer when he went in for his 1st colonoscopy on Halloween. It's been a whirlwind week with CT scan, xray, blood but got results that CT scan and xray clear, blood all normal what ever that means. My husband got the results and really didn't ask any questions so we are just kinda of waiting till Thursday for his surgery. He is real anxious about it and I really don't know how to ease his fears. Can you offer any suggestions on how to relieve his fears or what he can expect after the surgery. Thank you for taking the time to read this message. Sam24

Comments

  • vinny3
    vinny3 Member Posts: 928 Member
    Hi Sam,
    As we tell others, Welcome to the site but, of course, we regret having to say that as we would like to see this cancer beast stopped in its tracks. Did they tell you what kind of surgery your husband is going to have? Where in the colon is it? With my last surgery, which was a complete removal of the rectum and having a colostomy I really only noticed alot of pain when they were wheeling me from the operating room. After that the pain was pretty well controlled. They gave me IV fentenyl and I could give myself a "bump" when I needed it.

    We will pray for a good result for your husband with no spread.

    ****
  • vinny3
    vinny3 Member Posts: 928 Member
    Hi Sam,
    As we tell others, Welcome to the site but, of course, we regret having to say that as we would like to see this cancer beast stopped in its tracks. Did they tell you what kind of surgery your husband is going to have? Where in the colon is it? With my last surgery, which was a complete removal of the rectum and having a colostomy I really only noticed alot of pain when they were wheeling me from the operating room. After that the pain was pretty well controlled. They gave me IV fentenyl and I could give myself a "bump" when I needed it. They will get him up walking the next day, usually, and the more he walks the quicker he will get better.

    We will pray for a good result for your husband with no spread.

    ****
  • Sam725
    Sam725 Member Posts: 87 Member
    vinny3 said:

    Hi Sam,
    As we tell others, Welcome to the site but, of course, we regret having to say that as we would like to see this cancer beast stopped in its tracks. Did they tell you what kind of surgery your husband is going to have? Where in the colon is it? With my last surgery, which was a complete removal of the rectum and having a colostomy I really only noticed alot of pain when they were wheeling me from the operating room. After that the pain was pretty well controlled. They gave me IV fentenyl and I could give myself a "bump" when I needed it.

    We will pray for a good result for your husband with no spread.

    ****

    Hi ****,
    Thanks for the quick reply. The tumor he has is about 70 cm in and on the left side. The surgeon said he will try to do it laprascopy but my husband has a belly on him so he said he may have to do it the other way. I think the thing about the surgery that gets him is being put out and not having control over the situation ( I would feel the same way!) and it doesn't help that he has an anxiety disorder. Thanks for the prayers, we are taking all we can get! Sam
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  • vinny3
    vinny3 Member Posts: 928 Member
    Sam725 said:

    Hi ****,
    Thanks for the quick reply. The tumor he has is about 70 cm in and on the left side. The surgeon said he will try to do it laprascopy but my husband has a belly on him so he said he may have to do it the other way. I think the thing about the surgery that gets him is being put out and not having control over the situation ( I would feel the same way!) and it doesn't help that he has an anxiety disorder. Thanks for the prayers, we are taking all we can get! Sam

    I had the same anxiety regarding being put out and depending upon someone else to breathe for me and keep me alive. It went well but I couldn't sleep the first nite, I think I was afraid I might stop breathing. They kept an oxygen moniter on me though and that helped as I felt it would sound an alarm if I was not breathing.
    ****
  • jsabol
    jsabol Member Posts: 1,145 Member
    Hi Sam,
    Welcome to you and your hubby, but also sorry that you need to be here; your post is deja vu for me...I was diagnosed on my baseline colonscopy in Nov 03 with 1 cancerous polyp; surgery in Dec, with removal of a piece of colon. They did not do laporascopic surgery, and all went well. After 1 positive node and 6 months of chemo, I have No Evidence of Disease. My 3 year followup colonscopy is this week!
    I would recommend that you both be sure to discuss hubby's anxiety with the pre-op anesthesia visit. His fear is not unusual, and some extra anti-anxiety meds the day and night before his surgery may help.
    If your husband has not had surgery before, please reassure him that the pre-op meds also greatly reduce your anxiety, so he can experience much relief just prior to general anesthesia. (I actually look forward to the pre-ops because I know I'll feel a whole lot better with them in my blood!) I had an epidural in addition to general anesthesia, and woke to NO pain; it was left in for over a day, and was great. Be sure to encourage him to let the nurses know if he has any post op discomfort. He will need to be comfortable enough to get up and walk the next day, as walking gets the pipes working again.
    Getting this diagnosis starts you on a horrible roller coaster ride, but you will both get through this, step by step. After surgery, your docs will discuss with you what options will be best for your husband, depending on the extent of the cancer in his colon tissue and whether there is any lymph node involvement.
    Stay strong and focused; he's lucky to have your support. Keep us posted and best of luck with surgery on Thursday. Judy
  • nanuk
    nanuk Member Posts: 1,358 Member
    jsabol said:

    Hi Sam,
    Welcome to you and your hubby, but also sorry that you need to be here; your post is deja vu for me...I was diagnosed on my baseline colonscopy in Nov 03 with 1 cancerous polyp; surgery in Dec, with removal of a piece of colon. They did not do laporascopic surgery, and all went well. After 1 positive node and 6 months of chemo, I have No Evidence of Disease. My 3 year followup colonscopy is this week!
    I would recommend that you both be sure to discuss hubby's anxiety with the pre-op anesthesia visit. His fear is not unusual, and some extra anti-anxiety meds the day and night before his surgery may help.
    If your husband has not had surgery before, please reassure him that the pre-op meds also greatly reduce your anxiety, so he can experience much relief just prior to general anesthesia. (I actually look forward to the pre-ops because I know I'll feel a whole lot better with them in my blood!) I had an epidural in addition to general anesthesia, and woke to NO pain; it was left in for over a day, and was great. Be sure to encourage him to let the nurses know if he has any post op discomfort. He will need to be comfortable enough to get up and walk the next day, as walking gets the pipes working again.
    Getting this diagnosis starts you on a horrible roller coaster ride, but you will both get through this, step by step. After surgery, your docs will discuss with you what options will be best for your husband, depending on the extent of the cancer in his colon tissue and whether there is any lymph node involvement.
    Stay strong and focused; he's lucky to have your support. Keep us posted and best of luck with surgery on Thursday. Judy

    I'm pretty sure - if memory serves me, that Judyis a nurse. This should give you some solice in that a professional is telling you like it is..
    You both should be reassured that the tumor was caught early enough to remove it entirely-prognosis in this type of surgery is excellent. Tell Hubby to ask for anxiety meds in advance.
    Tell him also that there is a lot of experience on this site..welcome to the most knowledgable cancer forum in existence.. Bud
  • spongebob
    spongebob Member Posts: 2,565 Member
    Sam -First let me say that I think it is wonderful how you are being so supportive of your husband. You will play a very important role in his recovery and long-term treatment. On note of caution, though, be sure to take care of yourself, too, as you walk this road with him for the next several months.

    My suggestion is to have your husband log on here and just talk to all of us who have been down the road he's going to walk on Thursday. Having you tell him second-hand what we all say to you is good, but hearing it first-hand and having an opportunity to ask the "dumb" questions (there is NO such thing by the way) that he doesn't want to ask his doctors. Chances are pretty good that more than one of us wanted to know the same thing.

    I don't know if you or your husband are particularly spiritual (note I didn't specify "religious"), but I am a military officer(can you say "epitome of control freak'?) and when I was diagnosed, I just let go - i passed the burden along to a higher entity and comforted myself with the knowledge that everything happens accordingto a Plan. i can invest a lot of sweat, effort, and stomach acid on trying to manage and control the events associated with this Plan, or I can just relax and enjoy (or at least accept) my e-ticket ride!

    I hope this is helpful.

    Welcome to the SemiColons.

    - SpongeBob
  • taraHK
    taraHK Member Posts: 1,952 Member
    Hi and a warm welcome to this site. As you are discovering, it is a wonderful source of both information and support. I am so sorry to learn about your husband's diagnosis. We rejoice with you that the CT scan and xray are otherwise all clear. It is normal to be anxious before surgery. I agree with others that there is no harm in letting the doctors/nurses know -- there are ways to reduce anxiety. I always request a mild tranquilizer or sleeping pill the night before surgery. I like to go into surgery well-rested. I will share with you the advice I always give when someone is facing surgery: (a) make sure you get adequate pain relief afterwards. Don't be a hero about pain. Good pain relief can aid recovery (b) get up and walking as soon as possible, then walk as much as possible. Also, you may want to consider jotting down any questions or concerns you have, so you can raise them with the doctors/nurses later. Sometimes it is hard to think of questions at the time, but they come to you later! Sending you both all our best wishes. We'll be thinking of you on Thursday. Please feel free to "visit" here anytime.
    Tara
  • tkd3g
    tkd3g Member Posts: 767
    Hi Sam,

    Anxiety = Me. :) I have it too.

    I echo the other posts. I got a drug( don't remember what it was) but it totally took off the fear I felt before surgery. Drugs are so amazing. ( and I hate taking anything)

    So, yes, talk to your doc about your anxiety.

    Only other thing Iwould add, is if you need a post op pain killer - definately ask for an epidural. It is a great way to have NO pain and you aren't zonked out with Morphine.

    Best to you and your husband.

    Barb
  • changing
    changing Member Posts: 134
    Hi Sam, again welcome. Like you, I'm the caregiver and our situation sounds similar in many ways. My husband was dx'd with baseline colonoscopy in Aug 06 and had the lap surgery done for left side sigmoid cancer. He had a morphine pump for a few days after surgery and he did quite well...it helped the anxiety as well as the pain but he was never "knocked out, as you are given a button to push for more medication to go into the system as you need it, however, it will lock-up once you've reached your maximum dose. Hubby did well with recovery and before we left the hospital (3 day stay), they told how many of the lymph node were affected and the stage of cancer. Obviously we're fairly new to this group as well but EXTREMELY blessed to be here. Let us know how things are going and don't forget...you're not alone. I'll be looking for you! Hugs and prayers!
  • 4law
    4law Member Posts: 110
    You found your way to a great resource -- this website and the people who belong -- can give you and your husband a lot of support and point you in the right direction in gathering information when making decisions along the road to recovery. I realize you may not have time to get your hands on this book in time, but others who read this might find this book useful for getting through surgery, chemo/radiation: Peggy Huddleston's "Prepare for Surgery, Heal Faster: A Guide of Mind-Body Techniques".
  • Betsydoglover
    Betsydoglover Member Posts: 1,248 Member
    Sam -

    I am so sorry you have to be here.

    It is difficult to not be anxious prior to major surgery, but the more knowledge you and your husand can gain, the better you off you are.

    Scary as this is, realize you have much good news. A negative CT scan means there is little likelihood of metastatic Stage IV disease. Doesn't mean you have nothing to worry about, but does mean that the worst of your worries may be relatively speaking not worth worrying about.

    You also need to take this disease one step at a time - and the first step is surgery. (For some chemo drugs you have to wait a few weeks post surgery, so if that is the case with your husband, realize it is normal and try to help him with his recuperation before worrrying about the next phase. SO, try to focus on that for this week. If your husband is especially anxious - I understand that completely - you might talk to the surgeon about a standard order for an anti-anxiety drug every night while he is in the hospital - e.g. IV Ativan or something similar. When I had my surgery (June 2005) I was hideously anxious late at night and had to beg for something. I was having panic attacks - brick on my chest feeling - knew it was just panic, but every nite it took a couple of hideous hours before a resident would visit and immediately say that I wasn't having a heart attack (which I knew deep in my heart)and then finally give me the meds which enabled me to sleep a few hours. If I EVER have surgery again, I am going to get anxiety meds arranged up front!

    Anticipation is the worst part of the surgery. I had mine early on a Tuesday AM, ate my first solid food meal on Saturday AM and went home that afternoon. If I had not gone home that day, I think I might have died from lack of sleep. So, once home, I slept for several hours, took a shower, ate a little and went back to bed. The recovery started the next day, bt 4 weeks later I was back at work BIG TIME. (It did take until mid September for my appetite to recover - not everyone has that effect, but for me, the biggest surgery effect was appetite suppression).

    Take care (will be thinking of your husband Thursday)

    Betsy
  • pink05
    pink05 Member Posts: 550
    Sam,

    You've come to the right place for information and advice. Could you possibly get your husband's doctor to prescribe an anti-anxiety medication for him? When my dad was going through all this I had to take something for my own anxiety. I took clonazapam and it really helped. The other thing that really helped me and my family was prayer. It still helps me to get through some very difficult times. Many here have had the same surgery and have gotten through it just fine. My dad had the right side of his colon removed. Years before that, he had his prostate removed. He said that the recovery from the prostate surgery was much worse, but it could be because he had the colon surgery done laporoscopically. Your husband will do fine. I will keep you both in my prayers this week.

    God bless,

    -Lee-
  • nanuk
    nanuk Member Posts: 1,358 Member
    spongebob said:

    Sam -First let me say that I think it is wonderful how you are being so supportive of your husband. You will play a very important role in his recovery and long-term treatment. On note of caution, though, be sure to take care of yourself, too, as you walk this road with him for the next several months.

    My suggestion is to have your husband log on here and just talk to all of us who have been down the road he's going to walk on Thursday. Having you tell him second-hand what we all say to you is good, but hearing it first-hand and having an opportunity to ask the "dumb" questions (there is NO such thing by the way) that he doesn't want to ask his doctors. Chances are pretty good that more than one of us wanted to know the same thing.

    I don't know if you or your husband are particularly spiritual (note I didn't specify "religious"), but I am a military officer(can you say "epitome of control freak'?) and when I was diagnosed, I just let go - i passed the burden along to a higher entity and comforted myself with the knowledge that everything happens accordingto a Plan. i can invest a lot of sweat, effort, and stomach acid on trying to manage and control the events associated with this Plan, or I can just relax and enjoy (or at least accept) my e-ticket ride!

    I hope this is helpful.

    Welcome to the SemiColons.

    - SpongeBob

    Sponge: Your reference to "E-Ticket" gives away your age..I believe Disneyland discontinued the "E Ride" about 30 years ago.. bud
  • spongebob
    spongebob Member Posts: 2,565 Member
    nanuk said:

    Sponge: Your reference to "E-Ticket" gives away your age..I believe Disneyland discontinued the "E Ride" about 30 years ago.. bud

    dude... you're so harsh! I am too young to remember when they discontinued the whole E-ticket thing... My mom used to tell me stories about it as she tucked me in at night!
  • Sam725
    Sam725 Member Posts: 87 Member
    Hi Everyone,
    We want to say "Thanks" so much for the encourgement and prayers. He wants to know if he's become an offical "semi-colon" yet! He's become a member of ACS but is not ready yet to discuss it yet. Says he's still a little raw. Picked up some sleeping pills from the doc today so he can get some sleep, he's snoring now!. Hasn't slept the last few days. Me neither! Anyways thanks everyone, I'll let you all know how it goes Thursday. God Bless Sam
  • changing
    changing Member Posts: 134
    Just wanted to assure you and hubby that we are thinking of you today...we don't forget our friends! Take care of yourselves and write when you can....we'll keep lifting you in our thoughts prayers.