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son just diagnosed with cancer

Posts: 2
Joined: May 2006

dear cancer survivors, we are just beginning our journey with cancer, my sons 14 and is having a hard time, i dont know what to do because he doesnt want to talk to me and kicks me out of his room all the time, hes so tired? any suggestions

Posts: 14
Joined: Oct 2004

Hi I dont really have any advice for you, sorry. Although If he needs to talk to someone whos been there my e-mail address is shadow2137@hotmail.com. I am a two time ALL survivor and I was ther for my little brother when he combated a tumor. I am currently 24 and have been in the clear for 11 yrs.


DIVA's picture
Posts: 38
Joined: Apr 2005

Its hard I know that much. I was 21 when I was diagnosed and I felt like my parents didnt get it. I didnt want to hear the "everything will be ok" and "Im here for you". Because everything was not ok. my life was turned upside down. My plans were on hault and a new game plan had to be made by me. I didnt feel they were there for me like I needed. I needed to talk about it on my terms. It had to be MY terms and they thought ignoring it would be best. I didnt need a parent I needed a friend. Yes I was older then your son but cancer changes everything you feel at the time like it stole something from you. Your youth or your innocense. I realize now it gave me an advantage on others my age. I learned more then they will see in a lifetime. Most still dont get it but cancer scares people. I was scared to go back to college because I had nerve damange in my left leg. Limping to class and people staring yelling at me to move because I walked to slow. I was a commuter to school I didnt live on or near campus like 50% of the student body where I went to college. I did graduate found there are people who run when cancer comes up and people who want to be educated about it. One of my first 2 classes back I had a professor tell me I had no right to be there because cancer did not have a place in the classroom. Most of the other students in the class knew me and my situation before I even entered the room because I had had classes with them in my previous semester when I was diagnosed. They wanted to know about it and that I was ok and all convos haulted prior to class but the professor even though I aced all exams gave me a D which was a failing grade for my major in that class. Tried to fight it but it didnt work. I had another class it was a math type class but when there was time left over the professor with the students wanted to know about everything. Which is something I needed myself. To just speak about it and educate others to how it can change your life. Sounds odd but let your son come to you be a friend. I know at 14 for me though Im female I felt like my parents were an enemy that the lines of communication where not where I needed them to be. Im 25 now and though when it comes to my father I am not willing to communicate with him the way I am with my mom. I know at 14 it changed everything. Let him come to you talk about things he is interested in. You obivously can use the internet so look up info on what he is into. Then take that info and talk to him about it. I remember not feeling like my parents were into anything I was at that age so take an interest it may open the lines of communication about cancer.

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