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Confused about Dana Reeves

musiclover's picture
musiclover
Posts: 242
Joined: Oct 2005

I know Dana had lung cancer but I thought a few of you would know more about her. She seemed to be thriving, moving forward and then she was gone. Does anyone know what happened? It was such a shock because she seemed so positive and on the way to recovery.

I guess this has been on my mind lately because my friend Mark has been doing so great lately. He's working, not exhausted when he does errands, making plans for things in the future and I think he's even gained some weight. I'm thrilled but also very nervous about when those days will come back when he'll be sick again and I'll be a nervous wreck.

I didn't know Andrea - I wish I had. She sounded like a great person. The article is heartwrenching. It is dated two years ago when she was only 20!

StacyGleaso's picture
StacyGleaso
Posts: 1250
Joined: Mar 2003

You know, you cannot spend your NED days looking over your shoulder. Then, the cancer consumes you, and you spend every day walking on eggshells. TAKE EACH DAY FOR WHAT IT'S WORTH!!! Mark is doing fine, and THAT alone is a GREAT accomplishment from where he's been, don't you think?!??! Don't put the energy into seeing what happened into someone else's outcome, as each person is different. Then, if there's the slightest similarity, you'll fear the worst, when it may not be.

It's time to LIVE!!!!!!!!!

Tell Mark great job!

Stacy

AuthorUnknown
Posts: 1560
Joined: May 2006

I have heard the TV announcement when she passed away. They said that she never smoked and was very active. It came very quickly.

What are doctors' plan for Mark? It is great that he is doing good, but what is the treatment plan?

Treasure every day you spent together. I am glad that he has you.

2bhealed's picture
2bhealed
Posts: 2085
Joined: Dec 2001

In Traditional Chinese Medicine the lung is the organ of grief. (and the colon is "attached" to that too therefore colon is also considered an organ of grief).

So even though she never smoked she surely could have been overcome with grief in losing her life partner and father of her child.

You are assuming that Mark is going to be sick again. I know it's natural to prepare for the worst but this kind of thinking is counterproductive for him and for you. Take each day as a gift--the present that it is.

You don't know if YOU have tomorrow. So why worry about it now? So if Mark is doing great CELEBRATE!! and don't spend it wringing your hands waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Eventually we'll all be barefoot anyway!

peace, emily

spongebob's picture
spongebob
Posts: 2599
Joined: Apr 2003

C'mon, Em... I know you're gonna be laid out in your Birkenstocks! As for me, I plan to wear my combat boots (I hear it's mighty hot down there!)

2bhealed's picture
2bhealed
Posts: 2085
Joined: Dec 2001

dude, I'm getting torched on purpose (not by my sin nature, ahem) and will have my Birkies put on display (next to my mukluks)!! No laying out for me! Unless they can perform posthumous liposuction.

pink05
Posts: 553
Joined: Mar 2006

When reading other stories (especially the tragic ones) It's very difficult to resist the temptation to fear that the same will happen to yourself or a loved one. I know I am guilty of thinking that way. Every person is different. You cannot project that Mark's situation is the same. I am so glad that he is doing well. I know you were very worried about him. Sounds like he has made a turnaround. What a blessing!!!

KathiM's picture
KathiM
Posts: 8077
Joined: Aug 2005

You know the old saying...try to live it, I do!
"80% of what we worry about NEVER happens, and the other 20% that does happen, can't be changed by worrying!"
Breathe in, breathe out....dance, smile, laugh...
Hugs, Kathi

spongebob's picture
spongebob
Posts: 2599
Joined: Apr 2003

OK, musiclover -

How much do you love music? Contrary to what some people will tell you, Country really IS music (although judging from the big hair your band sported in the promo photo you sent, I would guess you didn't play any).

One of the BEST country music songs to come along in years is by Tim McGraw, it's called "Live Like You Were Dyin'". The songwriter (not McGraw) really nailed it. Download it, listen to it, LIVE it (emphasis on "live")...

Remember, we could get hit by a bus tomorrow!

Peace

- SpongeBob

musiclover's picture
musiclover
Posts: 242
Joined: Oct 2005

Bob, thanks for the letter. That is an old picture so I don't have the big hair anymore. I DO love country - Patsy Cline is one of my favs. I love Dolly and Clint Black (The Rain - wow!). I did electric blues on my last CD (many of the songs would be great redone with a country flair). You can check out my site and click the link to CDbaby where you can hear the entire CD. "Birthday Blues" is the last song and written by Mark. Kathryn www.kathryngrimm.com

spongebob's picture
spongebob
Posts: 2599
Joined: Apr 2003

I'm seein' a link at www.colonpalooza.com!

Betsydoglover's picture
Betsydoglover
Posts: 1256
Joined: Jul 2005

Hi Kathryn -

It is so difficult not to get caught up in worrying about what might happen. Anyone that says they never have moments like that is probably not being totally truthful.

BUT, like everyone else has said, try and appreciate the successes of today. It is so good that Mark is doing great and that is something to rejoice in. And while Dana Reeves certainly took a quick downturn, that really doesn't say anything about Mark. (I like Emily's TCM theory about the lungs being the organ of grief.)

Take care of Mark and yourself. And keep coming back here for support. This is definitely a tough road to travel and it does take effort to not have the fear of tomorrow destroy the goodness of today. (And feel free to email me any time.)

Betsy

shmurciakova's picture
shmurciakova
Posts: 910
Joined: Dec 2002

Please do not think that way. You know, from what I have learned of you that the mind has a very powerful effect on the body, disease or the lack thereof and so forth. If you believe you will be healed it is likely that you will be. It is tragic to read posts about others, for example what happened to Andrea, but you have to remember that Mark is not Andrea, nor is he Dana. (besides she had lung cancer). No two patients are the same. No two people have the same outcome. I have had to remind myself this many times. Just because one person took a turn for the worse, it does not mean that this will happen to ME! (or Mark).
We never know when our "time is up". We can only appreciate what we have been given and live and enjoy ourselves while we are here on this earth. I am now (after 1 1/2 years NED) finally getting to the point where I feel relaxed again and can live a day without worrying! I know your fears first hand, as a patient, but it does no good. You just have to keep on believing that Mark will get better - and it sounds like he already is.
Take care,
Susan.

musiclover's picture
musiclover
Posts: 242
Joined: Oct 2005

Thanks so much for all the great comments. Wow, it is so great to have the support of this group. I've been a worrier all my life and it has done absolutely nothing to help any situation so I guess I need to get a grip and do what ya'll are saying - be happy for this moment, believe no two cancer patients are alike and stop the worrying.

I'd like to think that Mark is doing well because of the food I'm feeding him. He's on the McDougall plan, a strict vegan diet with zero cholesteral. McDougall I've mentioned is famous for getting people off meds (high blood pressure, cholesteral, insulin...) and helping those with MS, arthritis and cancer (the most noteworthy is Ruth Heidrich, my mentor. 70, an athlete and 20 year breast cancer survivor www.ruthheidrich.com).

You can check out his site at www.drmcdougall.com. His August 2003 Newsletter has a great article about Cholesteral and Cancer. Here are some highlights (I'm also going to create a new post with this same info. I've met with McDougall and Heidrich several times and both have allowed me to pick their brains thorougly. I'm convinced.):

"Cholesterol in the diet and the cholesterol in the body (as reflected by the blood cholesterol) seem to be tied to the development and progression of cancer...Over the years, I have noticed that too many of my cancer patients have had high cholesterol levels. There is evidence that cancer cells have even higher demands for cholesterol than normal cells...Deprivation of abundant sources of cholesterol slows growth of the tumor, reduces the spread of cancer (metastasis), and prolongs survival...All cancer patients should be on a low-fat, no-cholesterol, plant-based diet..."

He's not suggesting one trade treatment for his diet but to be as healthy as possible and give the cancer nothing to feed on, i.e. - fatty cholesteral. I'd be interested in your comments. I think he is the most genuine, caring doctor I've come across with no agenda and no concern for making a buck.

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