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How to care my parent w/cancer

Posts: 1
Joined: Apr 2006

I just found out my mother (71 years) has mouth and throat cancer. She lives 4 hours away (by car). My father, to whom she is still married, is 75 years and in relatively good health. I am also married and have young children (ages 9, 6 and 3) so I cannot leave my family alone for extended periods. I feel helpless. What can I do to help? Any suggestions for how I can care for her while she undergoes treatment?

Posts: 1560
Joined: May 2006

You only have ONE mother, you are not going to have another one. Your family must understand what your mother means to you and they must support you. Whatever you have to do, you need to be with your mother right now. Either move your parents closer to you, or move there yourself, or drive there and be there. Maybe take a leave off your job. Whatever it takes... but be with your mother. I know it is easier for me to advise than really do it, but that is what I would do. I also live in Northern CA, in San Francisco bay area. I was never very close to my mother like some other women do. But when my mother was diagnosed with colon cancer, that woke me up. I have realised that she is the only one I have. That changed my outlook completely. You can e-mail me any time if you like. All the best to your mother.

Posts: 5
Joined: Apr 2006

I agree with the last post. I travel to my Dad 2 hours away and I am married with three young girls. My husband takes care of things when I am there. I hope your family pitches in and understands that you need to be with your Mom. Take care and may God take care of you and your Mother.

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