i need some cheerleading

Options
nettie4
nettie4 Member Posts: 145
edited March 2014 in Colorectal Cancer #1
hello all. i will have a treatment tomarrow and the last one was so hard i actually sd i am not doing this anymore. i have doing this since 1998 and like i have sd b4 i am getting tired in my body but my spirit is alive and well. it just gets really hard but having my 6 and 8 yr old i want to make sure i am here for as long as i can to help lead and guide my children in the values and things we believe and confess. i know there are so many with struggles and i pray for this board and so many i know. at this time just need and kick in the butt to keep going. thank you

nettie

Comments

  • RunnerZ
    RunnerZ Member Posts: 185
    #2
    Options
    Nettie,

    I know exactly how you feel. In the depths of my one year treatment for stage 3 rectal cancer there were days that I just did not want to move forward to treatment. I once sat down and cried on a Firday morning, knowing it was the day that I left work at noon to go to New York City for my chemotherapy. I, too, had very young children. You just keep doing it, somehow. It stinks! You should be commended for your fight Nettie! fatigue is a normal reaction to the treatment and the stress. It is O.K. Just plug through the final stage of treatment and look forward to a respite! Think of some reward you can offer yourself, like a massage, a nice meal, a movie, etc. You will be O.K., but it's so very O.K. to feel like you do! I'm pulling for you.
  • ron50
    ron50 Member Posts: 1,723 Member
    #3
    Options
    Hi Nettie,
    Runner is spot on mate ,you get tired and dispirited,it goes with the territory ,you can't fight for years against a life threatening disease without needing the occassional timeout. If it had been me on my own ,I don't know whether I would have bothered to fight so hard but when you are surrounded by loved ones ,you have to fight,it just wouldn't be right not to. Just remember that you have to have a life too Nettie,so be kind to yourself,all the best Ron.
  • DK2006
    DK2006 Member Posts: 126
    #4
    Options
    Hi Nettie
    My heart goes out to you! I know that how tired you are, but just ONE more. YOU CAN DO IT!
    I too have a 5 year old son. I'm fighting this battle for him. I personally, can think of no better motivation to "drink these cell killing cocktails" but for our kids.Do it because you are a Supermom! I'm also pulling for you. Donna
  • Betsydoglover
    Betsydoglover Member Posts: 1,248 Member
    #5
    Options
    Nettie - you have fought such a great fight so far. I am in awe of you. Keep remembering those kids (nothing like kids for a motivation - mine are 21 and 23 and they are still my big motivator.) It is tough, but you can do this. And you can beat this. I'll be thinking of you and sending good wishes.

    It is so easy to get discouraged - we all have been there from time to time - but pushing on and conquering this beast beats the alternative. Take care and give your kids an extra hug.

    Best wishes.

    Betsy
  • kangatoo
    kangatoo Member Posts: 2,105 Member
    #6
    Options
    Betsydoglover said:

    Nettie - you have fought such a great fight so far. I am in awe of you. Keep remembering those kids (nothing like kids for a motivation - mine are 21 and 23 and they are still my big motivator.) It is tough, but you can do this. And you can beat this. I'll be thinking of you and sending good wishes.

    It is so easy to get discouraged - we all have been there from time to time - but pushing on and conquering this beast beats the alternative. Take care and give your kids an extra hug.

    Best wishes.

    Betsy

    Hiya Nettie...hey, remember a long time ago...long time...we often spoke on the chat room?You are still here fighting my gal and thats proof of a helluva lot of courageous battles.You have every right to have a **** now and again and like everyone else here the absolute right to share your depression. SO for now
    kick...thump...belt...you asked to be kicked in tha butt gal.....you got it(albiet I had soft shoes on!)
    I agree with the others and especially Runner. Think of something that you would really like to do....finish this round gal and then treat yourself rotten!
    Personally I used to visualise my motorbike...then when my strenght came back I went out....with Jen and blew tha livin daylights out of the carbies.(geez...I hated not being able to ride that bike)
    You have been a pretty tough gal for your kids....do something special for you sweetie when this round is finished.
    huggs Ross n Jen
  • JADot
    JADot Member Posts: 709 Member
    #7
    Options
    Nettie:

    My heart really goes out to you. Gosh you're a trooper to have done this since 1998. I've only had 1 and I am dreading the 2nd one, I can only imagine how tired of it you feel. But hey, while I am thinking 1 down, 11 more to go, you can say "a bunch done, 1 last one to go". You're like the runner who's 2 steps from the finishing line. So chin up, chest out and give it that final dash to cross the line.

    This last treatment is such a huge milestone, I like RunnerZ's idea - you have got to plan a huge reward for yourself afterwards, or maybe plan for some fun things for the nurses and the buddies you're gone through chemo with. This is a huge occasion to be marked and celebrated!

    Best of luck to you, Nettie!

    Cheers,
    JADot
  • nettie4
    nettie4 Member Posts: 145
    #8
    Options
    hey guys. i guess i did not make myself clear. this will not be my last treatment only one of many to come. at this point i am not curable and the struggle is getting harder. the treatments are just hard on me sometimes so i whine a bit. thank you for all your kind words but wanted to make sure you all understood the situation a little better. my treatments are every 2 weeks. again thank you all.

    nettie
  • ron50
    ron50 Member Posts: 1,723 Member
    #9
    Options
    nettie4 said:

    hey guys. i guess i did not make myself clear. this will not be my last treatment only one of many to come. at this point i am not curable and the struggle is getting harder. the treatments are just hard on me sometimes so i whine a bit. thank you for all your kind words but wanted to make sure you all understood the situation a little better. my treatments are every 2 weeks. again thank you all.

    nettie

    G'day again Nettie,
    I am aware of your situation and I do understand ,and you are not whining. It is just the sound that happens when some one is caught between a rock and a real hard place. You make as much noise on this board as you want to ,we will all always be here for you. I don't know the future I just hope there is a major breakthrough and miracle just around the corner and it has Nettie 4 written all over it. I'll send you all of the luck and positive vibes I can muster,Ron.
  • Moesimo
    Moesimo Member Posts: 1,072 Member
    #10
    Options
    Nettie,

    My heart is breaking for you. I know it is sooo hard, but try to keep up the fight. My kids were 14, 17, and 21 when I was diagnosed. They kept me going. My fight wasn't as long as yours and your kids are so much younger. I hope that friends and family are helping you out.

    Maureen --- sending you huggggs!!!!!
  • scouty
    scouty Member Posts: 1,965 Member
    #11
    Options
    Hi Sweetie,

    Is this chemo regime working for you or do you know. I can tell you that it is always easier when the test show the chemo is doing something. Even if it is just holding the **** cells at bay.

    Remind me where you are now. With my surgeries and all, I have lost track (durn chemo brain).

    You know hugs and kisses are coming your way. I send them to you twice daily (have been for awhile you know).

    Love, Lisa P.
  • optimist
    optimist Member Posts: 51
    #12
    Options
    I go through the same thing every time I get chemo. I don't want to go. Half way through my ride, I say to myself this is not where I want to be in life. This is not what I want. Then, I snap out of it and robotically report to chemo and take what I have to. There is no easy answer. We have to do what we have to do for the sake of our families. I think the advice on this page gives good inspiration and I plan on reviewing it the next time I get in a "I don't wanna go" funk.
  • oneagleswings
    oneagleswings Member Posts: 425 Member
    #13
    Options
    Hi Nettie:
    You have said exactly what my husband said the other day- "I am not sure if I can continue to go through this every 2 weeks for the rest of my life" and my heart breaks that the only way to keep the monster at bay is to bravely allow the chemo to course through your body...lets just pray that a better way for dealing with this disease is just around the corner...
    Bev

Discussion Boards