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ER Again

Btrcup's picture
Posts: 287
Joined: Jun 2004

Morning all, Happy Memorial Day! Everyone say a prayer for the soldiers.

Well, Scott is back in the hospital. Had to take him to the ER Friday afternoon for uncontrollable vomiting. He was complaining of pain in the beginning of the week, then Wednesday he started vomiting and couldn't keep anything down. He was dehydrated when we got to ER. They gave him some fluids and an NG tube. He has a small bowel obstruction again. They won't do surgery, think it's too risky. He's been feeling better since he started on the fluids.

They are supposed to be letting him come home today. He's been on a liquid diet and has been keeping things down. He's been having a real bad problem with heartburn. It starts as heartburn, then he gets the hiccups, then his mouth starts to water, then he vomits.

He is so scared! When we spoke to the doctors last month, they said if he gets an obstruction, he will have to go on TPN (which he doesn't want to do). Then he may have a month, if that. I really HATE cancer!!

I have a couple of books from my kids guidance counselor about death and dying. They've been in my possession for a week, I just don't have the heart to read them to the kids. I know I have to, but I'm not sure I can handle it without getting upset. I've read them to myself and the tears started. My brother-in-law is here with me (Scott's identical twin). He's been doing some work on the deck because Scott just doesn't have the strength anymore. It's so wierd because Steve looks just like Scott and when he laughs, sounds just like him too. The kids are having a ball with him. I would hate to bring them down by reading these books.

Well, I've rambled enough! Gotta get off the puter in case Scott tries to call. Everyone be safe this weekend. You are all in our prayers.

Linda (Baltimore)

PS. There is a problem with the email system here so I can't respond just yet.

kerry's picture
Posts: 1317
Joined: Jan 2003

Hi Linda,

I'm so sorry about Scott having to go back to ER. I know things are getting pretty tough. Hang in there. We will be here for you whenever you need us.

You will find the right time to talk with the children about their dad and read the books. Perhaps their teacher would know a good counselor who could talk with them?

Take care.


alihamilton's picture
Posts: 348
Joined: Jan 2004

Hi Linda,

I am so sorry to hear about Scott...what a sad time for you and your family. I agree that the right time to talk to the kids will present itself. It will be difficult for you not to be upset when you talk to them. I am glad you have Scott's brother to help and give you some support. Do keep us posted and I hope Scott's homecoming goes well and he is able to eat at least something without vomiting.

My thoughts are with you.


spongebob's picture
Posts: 2599
Joined: Apr 2003

Hi, Linda & Scott -

Thanks for the note. I am glad to hear Scott is home and feeling better. Kerry and Ali had some good advice regarding the kids. You really seem to be handling this very well, Linda. Just be sure to allow yourself to let down, too.

Tell Scott I said hello. Know that I am keeping all of you in my thoughts and prayers.

- Bob

2bhealed's picture
Posts: 2085
Joined: Dec 2001


Hello friend,

You are amazing. I cannot imagine having to read a book about death and dying to my kids in regards to their father. I never read any to my kids when my sister was dying. They could see it. They saw me crying often and it got to the point where they would just ask, "Are you crying about Auntie Shan, mama?" they knew. Kids are smart. I hid nothing from them. They saw her crying out in pain. They saw how skinny and scary she looked at the end. They saw the bald spots on her head. They saw how sad I was all the time.

One day my daughter Shannon was crying and calling out for her auntie Shannon. She looked up as if to heaven and made her little hands into fists and cried out, "Auntie Shan come back, come back Auntie Shan, come baaaack." It just about broke my heart. She was only 4 years old but she understood that her Auntie was gone and not coming back.

The day that she died my husband and I took my 2 older kids (6 and 4) down the lake to tell them that Auntie Shannon had died and I kept looking back over my shoulder as if someone were approaching. It was weird. You know the feeling when you can tell someone is coming up behind you? Well I kept having that feeling but no one was there. So in my heart I just know that Auntie Shan was there with us as I told my kids that their beloved Auntie was gone.

I can tell you about some dreams I had too after she died. Pretty cool.

Anyway, Linda, we're here and praying for you both. Have you taken any drives in that sports car??

I appreciate the updates on Scott. You two are both amazing.

peace, emily

goldfinch's picture
Posts: 737
Joined: Oct 2003

I am so sorry for all you are going through. May you and Scott find the all the love, strength and courage that you need to help you during this difficult time. You are in my prayers.

kangatoo's picture
Posts: 2115
Joined: Feb 2004

Hullo Linda and Scott. We are here for you Linda and in my own special way I am feeling the sadness with you. That bond between us is always going to be there Linda. It does not matter that we have not met...but it does matter that we care so sincerely. Linda, I wonder if you would feel better telling your kids if Steve was able to be with you at the ime. It seems that you and Steve would be able to comfort each other when the time comes to read to your kids. Your kids affinity to Steve is obvious, maybe this might be the way to make things easier.
luv and huggs always Linda, Ross and Jen

Posts: 168
Joined: Feb 2005

Linda I am really sorry this is happening right now. Maybe you and Scott can talk to you children together?

scouty's picture
Posts: 1976
Joined: Apr 2004

Linda honey,

I trust you will find the way to talk to your children. I agree with Emily, they already know something is up.

And I agree with Emily that you are truly awesome. I respect you so and am here for you if you need it. Just let me know.

Mostly I just want to send you a heartfelt hug and a friendly shoulder to cry on. I think of you and your family several times every single day. Today, before I read your post, I was watering some of my flowers and I thought of you and wondered how you were doing. I think you know we are all with you and send our love and admiration. Take care of Scott and the kids but do try to take care of yourself too.

With huge admiration and respect,

Lisa P.

taunya's picture
Posts: 392
Joined: Jul 2002

I am so sorry to hear that things are so difficult for your family. I am sure that you have a ton on your plate and telling the children must seem a daunting task. It probably will go better than you think. You all will be able to get through it together. It must be odd to have Scott's twin there. I am sure glad that he is there to help you all.
If there is anything I can say or do, please let me know.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and Scott and the children.

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