CSN Login
Members Online: 6

You are here

i still dont know anything

Posts: 145
Joined: Mar 2004

i have not posted in a while cuz my computer went down and still is. i do read the posts from another computer. i am saddened by some and rejoicing with others. at this time i still do not know anything about me. my surg from mayo still has not given me an opinion on my films from sept. i am on a new treatment cpt 11 and erbutux. its kickin my butt too and i have a hard time some days. one day i spent the whole day crying i am just sooooo emotionally drained right now. i have been on some form of treatment for almost 2 yrs and i think it is starting to get to me. i know i should not complain i have so many blessings in my life like more time with my family, but sometimes its hard. i have multiple lesions in the lungs that i am waiting to hear if they are operable or not. my cea is 2.5 and that makes me uncomfortable. i am praying that all will turn out well and i will be blessed to be here with my children for years to come. not knowing is the worst. i would even be willing to have a lung transplant if that would solve this problem. i love Chirstmas and am planning to spend it with no side affects from chemo. i have treatment 3 weeks on 1 off so friday is my last treatment for a week. i will continue to fight this beast although my body feels as though it is just hollow and i could just fall over yet my feet keep movin and my smiles and helping others just keeps coming. i hope all of you have a Merry Christmas and may the new year bring better things. thanks for listening and any encouragement will do.


littlejulie's picture
Posts: 311
Joined: Mar 2004


I dont know what to say besides I wish you all the best. A mother's love is irreplaceable. Your children need and deserve to have you with them. My future mother in law bought a beautiful painting painted by a women who had breast cancer that spread to her lungs. It's called "This too shall pass". Thats the truth. Its 4 years later and this lady is still painting CANCER FREE. Keep the faith - your children need you too.


Anonymous user (not verified)

Nettie, keep your chin up and your hope burning brightly. Your keeping the beast at bay and that's a big accomplishment. Yes, your children do need you and when those bad days hit, it's so easy to think of throwing in the towel but focus on the good days and how wonderful life can be and will continue to be. A CEA of 2.5 is nothing alarming...under 3 is normal in non-smokers and under 5 in smokers...in some cases, even higher can be "normal" for some people. You've made it this far and you WILL make it all the way.

Have a wonderful holiday and best wishes for the new year too.

Monika and Bert

spongebob's picture
Posts: 2598
Joined: Apr 2003

Nettie -

You keep fighting girl - wear that dragon down and cut it's head off.

Have a beautiful Christmas. I wish I could send you a file with my favorite christmas song on it to help you capture the spirit; it's Manheim Steamrollers "Silent Night" - it's simply incredible.

Cherry Mistmas... woops... got into that takillya cake..

Merry Christmas!

- SB

Posts: 835
Joined: Apr 2004

Arough year for you that I am sure you won't be sad to say goodbye to. But you are not alone- there are many people out here with simialr experiences who are happy to help suport you through out what ever next year holds for you. Your fighting tenacity is inspiring to all of us and gives us all hope that we can find the strength to fight as hard as you have.
Keep up the good fight and keep us informed of how things go,

Posts: 186
Joined: Nov 2004

You keep going Nettie. Next year at this time, your family will probably have to tie you to a chair so they can keep up. Keep up the fight. Even perfectly healthy folks have those rough emotional days, so try not to let that overwhelm your spirit.


Posts: 105
Joined: Apr 2004

Sweet, nettie, I have had you on my mind and in my prayers. I check my email every day to see if I have heard from you. Dont get discouraged. None of us know what tomorrow holds, but you have today and today you are breathing and here with your family and all of us. I love Christmas too. It is my FAVORITE time of year and I thank God that I have this Christmas with my family as well. As we both have said to each other, we KNOW who IS in control and that He has a future and a hope for you and for your children. He isnt going to leave you or forsake you, so you are not alone. He is our refuge and our strength especially when we are sick and tired of fighting the effects of this world so He picks us up and carries us. Just remember, one day at a time, one step at a time. And remember you are LOVED! Please email me when you can and keep posting at least here so I can check on you.
Love and prayers,

taunya's picture
Posts: 392
Joined: Jul 2002

Nettie, Honey you just keep right on fightin'. I am thinking of you. I wish I could hug you. Don't let this monster wear you down. It aint over till the fat lady sings and they're all on weight watchers! I am sending all my love and support to you.

Subscribe to Comments for "i still dont know anything"