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The dr.'s have given up on my daddy!!

legina
Posts: 10
Joined: May 2001

Hello, this is Legina and I have told you all about my daddy having small cell carcinoma. Well, it has been 18 months and 1 week since he was diagnosed and now the dr.'s tell us that it is over, that my daddy will die and they aren't doing anymore treatments or anything to help him. They have called in Hospice to take care of him and keep him out of pain. I am not dealing with all of this very well! I don't want to give up on my daddy and he doesn't want to give up either. So what do you do when you are basically told that he is going to die and there is nothing you can do about it??
He has so much to live for and he is only 50 years old!!! Life is so unfair and I have no faith in dr.'s anymore!! Does anyone out there have any new treatments that they know about for small cell carcinoma??? If so let me know, if not just please pray for him!!
Thank you for listening.

Legina

gronya
Posts: 3
Joined: Jul 2001

LEGINA
KEEP THE FAITH. EVERY DAY THEY SEEM TO BE COMMING UP WITH NEW DRUGS. HOPEFULLY IT WILL BE IN TIME FOR YOUR DA. MY HUSBAND HAS LUNG CANCER HE IS ONLY 53 HIS CANCER HAS SPREAD TO HIS LYMPH NODES SO WE DON'T KNOW HOW LONG HE HAS ALL WE CAN DO IS HOPE AND PRAY
GOD BLESS GRONYA

loulou
Posts: 66
Joined: Sep 2000

Hi Legina, I am so sorry to hear about your dad. I know what your going through, I lost my dad to small cell lung cancer, wow, it will be 3 years Sept. 2. I still cant believe he is gone. He died six weeks after his diagnosis, we hardly had time to think. My dad was my best friend, and soul mate. We just knew each other inside and out. We were so much alike. He was so much apart our my life, my kids live's, and my husbands live I couldn't imagine live without him. So, when we found out about his cancer I could hardly breath...

God helped me get through that huge loss. Some how I still feel real close to my dad, as if he was still here with me. I can feel him, hear him, and still see the sparkle in his eyes. During those last few days, we shared words of fear, love, encouragement, and we shared so many feelings, I believe those moments have made me a stronger person today. There were moments that I wouldn't give-up for anything.

With God's help, I was able to love him enough to tell him it was ok for him to go. I said good-bye! It was the hardest thing I ever had to do. I thought I would never stop crying.

I thought if I kept crying and mourning him, some how he would stay alive. My husband at that time said, " your dad hasn't really gone any where, you are your dad, let him continue to live through you as he always has, and he will always be close to you." That remark made so much since to me, that I was able to move on. My dad will always live on through me, as will your dad...

There's a book I have read that might help you, and your dad get through this time. Maybe you could read it together, it's called "Love,Medicine, and Miracles", by Bernie Siegle, M.D. It's wonderful. Legina, my thoughts will be with you and your family. loulou

legina
Posts: 10
Joined: May 2001

I would like to thank you and everyone else for your concern. Loulou, your words that you wrote to me really hit home. That is exactly how I feel about my daddy. I know that my daddy will die before long but I can't seem to accept it. I know the time will come that I will have to and I appreciate what you said about your dad, it will help me get through this. Thank you very much.
Legina

loulou
Posts: 66
Joined: Sep 2000

Legina- If or when you feel the need to chat please feel free to send an email.
My heart goes out to you. loulou

marcy's picture
marcy
Posts: 58
Joined: Dec 2000

Oh Legina, I feel so bad for you. I know exactly what you are going through. My Daddy just passed away this past June 9th. This was the most devestating experience of my entire life.What a terrible loss my family had when my daddy passed. I miss him so much. Small cell is nasty. It tricks you an reacts to the chemo. It makes you think the chemo is working. You think all is better when it plans a sneak attack.
The only thing I can say is..keep strong. Keep faith. Hopfully your daddy will not suffer much pain. Hospice is wonderful. Please listen to them. Their first priority is for the patient to be without pain. They will help you cope. Let them help you. Your daddy is very young. This seems so unfair. We don't know why these things happen. But, they do. Let God guide you and give you peace.
My prayers are with you, honey, I know what you are going through.
Marcy

legina
Posts: 10
Joined: May 2001

Thank you so much for your concern and I am so sorry about your daddy. I am sorry to say that my daddy passed away on Labor Day, and I will always miss him. But I do know that he is in a better place, there is no doubt that my daddy is in heaven and I will see him again. He was my best friend and I will love him forever but it is so hard to live without him. But, I had a talk with him before he died and I know that he was ready to go and that he is in a better place.
Thank you for your concern once again.

My prayers are also with you and I am glad to hear someone that really knows what I am going through. Small cell is a very cruel diease, but it is over for our daddy's and we will see them again.

Sincerely,

Legina

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