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Posts: 8
Joined: Feb 2001

After a lumpoctomy in October and radiation that end the day after Christmas I was so happy to be done with treatment.I started tamoxifinin mid January. Now Im waiting for the 6 month follow up and I feal like Im just waiting for another bad blow. Has any one experienced that and how do you manage living in limbo land like this.I am very active. I go to the gym 3 days a week and Im skiing again. That helps but the bad fealing always come back usually at 2:00 in the morning.

Posts: 931
Joined: Oct 2000

Hi Alice. I,m Cathy. I had a lumpectomy then mastectomy in Sept. with Tramflap recon. Had revision of recon. on Feb. 2. Am Taking Tamoxifin since Oct. Didn't need chemo or radiation. It's scarey waiting. I think it will always be that way but we have to try to go on with life and not worry all the time unless we have something definite to worry about. Take care. Cathy

Posts: 335
Joined: Aug 2000

Hello Alice, Welcome to our group. You were in the chat room this morning and I tried everything to come in but will not let me in. My name goes on the screen and it tells me I have joined the chat, but I do not get a response to any message. Frustrating. We all feel the anxiety, after cancer, and during treatment. I think I feel lumps everywhere and my doctor laughs at me. I think we will learn to live with it in time. But, I doubt any of us will ever be anxiety free. It is wonderful that you caught yours so early that no chemo was needed. Ellen's cancer was like yours, she had lumpectomy, radiation and Tamoxifen. You may want to read some of her older posts. She is a wonderful woman and will give you a lot of encouragement. Stay with us, we are a family. Love to you, Nancy

mjdp2's picture
Posts: 142
Joined: Nov 2000

Hi Alice,
I had lumpectomy, some chemo, radiation and am now on Tamoxifen. Because I needed the chemo my followups are still every 4 months with yearly mammograms. This July I am approaching my 3 yr. "anniversary". Just had my annual mammogram. I thought I felt something so they immediately gave me an ultrasound and told me everything was fine. When I see my oncologist, he runs blood tests to confirm everything is OK. Continue to do monthly self exams so you will notice any changes. While on chemo I kept waking up at 1AM to go to the bathroom. It was hard to break that habit once chemo ended. Being active will hasten your recovery so you are already on that road. Logging on to this site and reading all the postings will help you as well. Take care. Love Margaret

Posts: 130
Joined: Nov 2000

Hi Alice, my name is Judy. I had a mastectomy mid Dec. I did not have to have chemo or radiation. I am taking tamoxifen. I find just keeping busy is the best thing for me. I am always moving something or rearranging something. I do some crafts also, anything to keep my mind occupied. Sometimes I just drive myself crazy but I guess at least it keeps me from worrying to much. I wish you the best. I will keep you in my prayers. Everyone on this site is so helpful. Judy

pamtriggs's picture
Posts: 407
Joined: Sep 2000

Hi Alice

I had mastectomy nearly 20 hyears ago. It's back now but I had all those years free. Just think what a waste worrying for all that time would have been. It's hard but try to put it out of your mind as much as possible. Every check gets easier believe me. You are doing the right things by keeping busy & active. 2 am is always a bad hour. You feel you are alone in the world while all around you are sleeping. Get an absorbing computer game & play that when the 2am heebies hit. Good luck for the 6 month follow up. Love Pam

Posts: 45
Joined: Jan 2001

hi, everybody here will tell you that dealing with the fear is one of the toughest parts of having cancer. i'm still finding my own way of dealing with it,too. feel free to contact me,all the peple here are very good about helping. hugs,cj

Posts: 114
Joined: Feb 2001

Hi, Alice! Welcome!! I am only 5 weeks into this "adventure" and I feel like I am always waiting for another bad blow. My husband and my pastor are so positive that I am going to be fine.....I wish I could bottle that and take a swig when I am feeling unsure. Sounds like you are doing all you can to keep your mind occupied. I had the US technologist (also a good friend) ask me yesterday how I was doing mentally. That's what I see it as now---a mental game. Physically, I don't feel like I am sick until I go to reach for something, change clothes, shower, etc. I wish I could motivate myself to get physically active--we have a gym membership, but with a 6 mo. old baby, it makes going a bit difficult. I guess that she is my exercise!! Perhaps jumping onto the site at 2 AM would help...or as was suggested, get a good computer game that you can do mindlessly--Solitaire is my favorite time buster!! Anyway, I wish you well and am here for you. Feel free to e-mail me anytime. I try to check in everyday, but it sometimes takes me a day or two to be able to respond. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Blessings....Wendy

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