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First experience with cancer in friend

Posts: 1
Joined: Jul 2000

My daughter's very good friend, a woman in her mid to late 30's, has just been given a "60% survival rate" (I think that's the term), since her breast cancer (double mastectomy) has spread to her lungs. The doctor said it is a "very aggressive" form of cancer. Cindy starts chemo tomorrow and the doctor said that the first chemo is a very serious matter. Cindy's mother died before we knew her. She has a sister in Maine & a neice in Connecticut (We live in NJ). Her neice is coming in for the weekend, but no one will be able to stay with Cindy during this first chemo appointment.

I don't drive, but I can get to Cindy's doctor by bus. I am a 67 y/o widow, not in the best of health, but no serious condition. This will be my first experience with cancer, but I have heard how absolutely devastating chemo can be. I would like to stay with Cindy during chemo, if it would be helpful. Not sure it would be though. Don't know what to expect. Wouldn't want to let Cindy down. I know this is the beginning of a long haul for Cindy. I am unable to drive, so I can't go to her home, but I can take the bus to her chemo appts. Advice? Suggestions? Opinions? Thanks.

Posts: 40
Joined: Oct 2000

Sandy, I think it is wonderful you want to help and support Cindy. That is a very important to someone when they have cancer. From my experience, with my battle of Hodgkin's Disease, I couldn't get through it with out people like you. I enjoyed company throughout my chemo appointments. I suggest though that you ask Cindy what she wants. Chemo is not easy to go through, but with good emtional support, it helps. It's going to be a tough battle. I sure she will appreciate all the support you can offer.

Posts: 22
Joined: Oct 2000

Hi does this person live alone? how far is she from you? after her first chemo how many does she have to do? is her family going to be by her all the way? little things help, does she have animals that need tending to? I gather by the date of your letter she probably had the chemo already? how did she react? my mom is 56 with lung cancer she did 30 doses of radiation mon-fri for 6 weeks and is going in for her 4th round of chemo monday, she reacts well no nausea, she gets alittle tired though for about a day and a half the last one wore her out good because they gave her a flu shot too, but anyway that's nice that you want to help and are concerened and it's hard to travel, maybe invite her over for dinner when she feels up to it or if its not far make something and drop by my mom stays with me after chemo until she feels better so I can keep an eye on her and watch for a temperature and chase a glss of juice or what ever she needs I do her laundry too some times just getting up to go to the restroom or taking a shower can wear you out for the whole day!!but everyone's different does she have a husband to help her or kids to look after?sometimes just running to the grocery store can help, those shopping carts are full of germs and you have to watch that as your immune system can go to pot temporarily, yes I am an only child and I have 3 kids and a husband and am trying to help my mom emmotionally and financially, you just do what you can do the best you can, little things mean alot they really do no matter how small it is good luck to her I'll check back on your postings .

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