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Newly diagnosed

Posts: 14
Joined: Aug 2000

Hi everyone:
I'm a newcomer to this site. I was just diagnosed
with breast cancer and am looking for some direction. I have no idea what's next yet. I'm slowly finding out that the waiting is worse than anything else. Any words of wisdow will be appreciated.

Posts: 1
Joined: Aug 2000

Being newly diagnosed can be frightening, but things will go well. Will you have radiation or chemo? Keep your lines of communication open.

Posts: 14
Joined: Aug 2000

Hi Star
I haven't gotten that far yet. I have one more visit (this week) with the surgeon. I guess if everythings alright with the incisions, I'll go on to meet with the oncologist. That's about it for now.

Posts: 3
Joined: Aug 2000

The waiting is the worst part. Try and keep a positive attitude and a good sense of humor. It will come in handy. Find someone whom you can talk to that has been through this treatment. It helps to calm the fears. Good Luck

Posts: 335
Joined: Aug 2000

Hello Vinnie, I just figured out how to respond to the discussion area. You and I are about the same spot in treatment, I think. I have had my tumor removed and the next step is to meet with the radiation oncologist and then the oncologist that will help decide my treatment. After that I have another surgery to check the lymph nodes to see if any cancer cells are there. Please keep in touch with me and we can exchange information as we go. I am older than you, I imagine, I am 61 and have three grown children and four grandchildren. I read where someone expressed the feeling that this is like a dream. That is so true. Cancer is something that sneaks up on you. So many others have gone through this and stayed positive. We can too. Have you read anything from Dr.Day.com? She is sure that we can beat cancer with nutrition and prayer. I am sure both will do much good but I would be afraid to use all her teachings.

Posts: 14
Joined: Aug 2000

Hi Nancy:
I still haven't quite figured out how to get around this site. So I decided to rename our talks so that I don't have to get dizzy trying to figure if I responded or not. Anyway, its great to have someone to talk to about this situation. You mention that your going to the radiation oncologist and then to the oncologist who will decide on treatment. That sounds like more than one!!!!! Are we suppose to be going to several oncologists?? or is that determined once the treatment is decided? I just made an appoint with on Oncologist who was referred by the surgeon. I guess I'll go to him, hear him out and then try for a sencond opinion. Everything seems to take so long or maybe I'm just anxious to find out everything NOW. Back to us, I'm 52 but also have 3 grown children and 4 grandchildren. And I don't have to tell you "What a joy they are". So I agree, when you say we have to stay positive. NO DOUBT
You mentioned DrDay.com, no I haven't heard of that but someone from work brought me in a bunch of books on Cancer and Positive Thinking and also on Nutrition. And although I'll go with the Prayer first, I think the nutrition part sounds like a definite. I love to eat, so I wouldn't mind eating lots of good stuff and put my cancer cells in a state of shock. Hope your feeling ok. Talk to ya soon. vinnie

Posts: 335
Joined: Aug 2000

Hi back Vinnie, it was good to hear from you. I too have a hard time with these posts and have read them over and over, not knowing if I have read them already. I tried to print out and start a file, but the format is too wide and the only way I can print is to go to word first.

I'm not sure if everyone sees more than one oncologist. My surgeon wanted me to see the radiation oncologist before he did the lymph node surgery, just to explain the radiation therapy. I agree all this is taking soooo long!! The biopsy surgery was very quickly done, but there is such a long wait to get appointments with these oncologists. I had the biopsy on August 11th, and here it is the first of September and I am still waiting until September 12th for my appt There is so much TRUST involved in this process. I am trying to inform myself with as much information as I can find so I will know what questions to ask the Doctors. How do we know what to ask until we have experienced the subject....I took a small tape recorder with me to my last question appt. with my surgeon and that really helped. Then I transcribed our conversation so I could refer back to it when I get confused. I found that even though I listened and took notes, My memory was still missing answers to questions I knew I had asked. I like the email function of this forum better that the posting and if you do not mind I will email to you and we'll keep in touch. It helps so much to know someone who really understands is listening. Your friend, Nancy

Posts: 14
Joined: Aug 2000

Hi again
I love the idea of us e-mailing each other. For the little time that I've been online, I've been searching to see what else is out there as far as support and information. Lifetime has a great Survivor base. I was reading some of the stories and it makes you just want to cry. I still believe positive attitude is the key, but listening to others speak can sometimes put a damper on what you think. Anyway, I'm trying to understand the process and what is out there to help us beat this thing. Reading about how some people take cemo with no problem and others are always sick. I wish there was one easy answer but I know "thats much to easy". Well, how was your weekend? We were out all day yesterday, but now I just want to relax and enjoy the rest of the long week-end and do some research. My e-mail is "vinnpal66@netzero.net. So let me know how your feeling and if anything is new and exciting. your friend. vinnie

Posts: 9
Joined: Sep 2000

Nancy, I too am a new comer. It seems its that way all over. I'm in S. CA. and they wanted to do the biopsy quick like a monkey but then its see this Dr. ask these questions, prepare for this mastectomy. Put the brain on Warpspeed, you heart in a cellblock and the tears, well if we could only collect them all and use them to put out forest fires they would be out in one day. I've been diagnosed with lobular carcinoma. The surgical oncologist didn't beat around any bushes came right out and said the only treatment was a mastectomy. Knock me on the floor! (She's been very helpful though). Saw my regular physician, very supportive. Said to call anytime. Surgeon gave me the names of 2 plastic surgeons. Saw one on Friday. Think I stick with him. More people more confussion. (Don't any of these guys have a sense of humor)? Just need the courage now to say yes, do the dasterdly deed. Do the surgery. Then it see him for pre-op, see her for pre-op, go to hospital for pre-op test and x-rays (I'll glow in the dark soon)! Then the surgery. Then who know what. More of the same or worse. I guess it just doesn't end here, it goes on and on and on. I do understand however that this type of communication with others who don't understand either is helpful. Its nice (and I don't mean that to be cruel) to know that there are others out there (how many times have you felt that you were out there alone, did anyone have what you did, what did they do, how did they act, etc). I'm so glad to have you "newcomers on the block" as friends. All the friends who are so supportive and give you all the good wishes, etc. just really don't understand how confused, hurt, misunderstood, impatient, angry, and sad we are. I guess you have to be there and I would'd wish this on even my very worst of enemies.
I hope everyone keeps in touch. We all need each other.

Posts: 335
Joined: Aug 2000

Hello Mcgruff, Yes it does help very much to talk to other people in this same boat!!I found the site very confusing at first and found myself re-reading all the messages, but now I use this email and I print everything so I can remember what I said and who I said it to. I am in the midwest, Kansas City, MO. I live on the Mo/Ks state line. I was a California family back in the 60,s. Lived in San Francisco and then bought a house in San Jose. I loved the CA experience but I am a heartland girl and was always homesick for family. We moved back to Missouri and I do miss the CA. weather. Even miss the SF FOG....

I had the biopsy on August 11th and am set up to see my radiation oncologist this month and the cancer oncologist the following day. I still do not know what is ahead of me. After these two visits, I will go back to surgery to have my lymph nodes checked. My cancer is a infiltrating ductal carcinoma, the tumor was 2cm in size, and was graded as 2/3. I will not know what stage they feel I am until the oncologist visit. My experience has been a "comedy " of errors. They lost my bone scan for two weeks, then found it....my surgeon did not have any info on the complete pathology done on the tumor. Did nothing to boost my confidence in this situation but I am trying. I feel like this is all unreal and I do not think I have allowed myself the reality of what is happening yet. I am not at all depressed and I go day by day in my same routine without worry. One thing I have done is give my worry to GOD, and I trust him completely to guide me. I am concentrating on the search for information and diet and prayer. Keep in touch to share info. I check this site daily and will respond whenever you need to talk. My email is kinkeeper@kc.rr.com if you want to email direct. Your new friend, Nancy Sims

I am fortunate to have a good friend who just finished treatment. She had the mastectomy and chemo and radiation and is recovering well. She and I are the same age. Her experience was, that it is all very unpleasant but bearable.

Posts: 137
Joined: Aug 2000

Hang in there ladies. The confusion will sort itself out. I saw my primary care doctor on a Monday, had a mammogram and ultrasound on Wednesday, saw a surgeon on Thursday and my oncologist on the same Thursday. Talk about your head spinning! My surgeon canceled his flight on Tuesday because he didn't want to wait another week to do this operation. That got me to thinking! On Tuesday I had the mastectomy. Then the waiting. So my ordeal was a little backwards from most of you.

Posts: 2
Joined: Aug 2009

My regular doctor did a manual exam, said she felt nothing but I should have a mammogram anyway. Ten days later, while having the mammo, the technician said, "Did you know you have a lump here?" It took another few days to find a place to go for treatment. I contacted the "cancer center" of a local hospital, to be put on hold-three times. Then they said, "Drop off your x-rays and we'll let you know when we read them." No way. I called a friend who had breast cancer about ten years ago (she is fine)and she called HER doctor who recommended Robert Wood Johnson hospital and advised three surgeons. My appoinment is 8/13 but the waiting is maddening.

Is mastectomy always the result? Seems to be a lot of it on this site...as if I am not scared enough. I do not find any comfort in prayer, I am just waiting....the longest wait of my life.

Posts: 11
Joined: Aug 2000

Hi Vinnie,
How is everything going today? I see you use this site a lot, I haven't figured it out yet. What's your next hurdle? Let me know how things are going for you. Denise

Posts: 14
Joined: Aug 2000

Hi Denise:
Good to hear from you and yes I have tried to stay in touch with a few great women that I have met on this site. I think, last time we spoke, we were about at the same place. I'm still waiting for my appointment with oncologist (Monday 9/11) so for now, I still know nothing.
How about you. Have you started treatment, if so how are you feeling and what Treatment are you taking. If you notice the subject, every so often I start a new subject hoping it's easier to respond, or to read new mail. But I figure a few of us are close to starting some treatment this week and next, so it was a perfect heading, Wouldn't you say?
Hope your well, send me a line and I'l keep you informed.
God Bless and be well.

Posts: 7
Joined: Dec 2002

hi vinnie

if you read all the info in my home page in my web site www.tahitiannoni.com/purejuice you surely will e-mail me to ask me any questions you may have.this is a all natural product from tahiti and has a long history and is on Discovery Channel this month to to tell all about it.the body can repair it self with proper nutrition and Morinda's Tahiti Noni help's you achive that.thank you and good health to you .bye


Posts: 6
Joined: Oct 2003

Vinnie --
I was diagnosed in Janaury...was scared out of my wits. I have been through 4 months of chemo before surgery, surgery (left modified radial mastectomy), am finshing 4 more months of chemo and then radiation. I will then be on tamixofen for 5 years. Take on day at a time. Your surgeon will more than likely tell you to see an oncologist who will be in charge of chemo/radiation. please do not hesaitate to contact me.

Karen Reilly

Posts: 1
Joined: Apr 2009

I had a lumpectomy march 6 2009. they did not find any cancer in the lymph nodes,i do not need to have chemotherapy, but iam doing radiation therapy in the next week or so. Tell me how the radiation makes you feel. They alsowant me to take tamoxifen for 5 years. My recurrence score is 21 tamoxifen my lower it by 7 persent, so i am gonna pass on the tamoxifen and take my chances. do you think that i am crazy? thank you . My name is Eustatia.

Kristin N's picture
Kristin N
Posts: 1969
Joined: Mar 2009

So far, the radiation has made me tired. I have a slight pinkness where I am receiving the treatment. I am not burnt from it yet, but, am expecting to be further on down the road. The doctor's give you medicine to put on yourself to make it better. The driving everyday is wearing enough, let alone the treatment. There are several threads here on Radiation...read them and they should help. Good luck to you!

lolad's picture
Posts: 671
Joined: Jun 2009

Wanted to welcome you to the site. You made a good choice by coming here. Everyone here always has great support to give and even make me laugh at times of need. I dont know what i would do without the board. The waiting game is very hard to get through we all know that too. Hang in there and just keep coming back to the board for supposrt.


aztec45's picture
Posts: 757
Joined: Jul 2009

Just wanted to welcome Vin and Nanc to the site. You will find that this is the best place to be if you have breast cancer. Everyone is here to help you and support you through it. We laugh, cry, vent, rant, whatever we need together. It helps.

The waiting is the worst. It seems like forever, but that is because you want to know what is going on NOW. You will get the news you need and then it will be a whirlwind on tests, more tests, more consultations, much bloodwork, and then the plan.

Hang in there.


Akiss4me's picture
Posts: 2192
Joined: May 2009

Just wanted to welcome both of you to the site. Glad you found us. We are walking in all stages of our treatments and have some long time wise survivors among us as well. Please come here for any reason and at anytime.
Nancy, not everyone has a mastectomy. In most situations, having a lumectomy with radiation (what I choose) is the same as having a mastectomy without radiation. Your Surgical Oncologist will be best in guiding you to your particular situation.
Look forward to seeing both of you posting on the boards! :(-) Pammy

Posts: 6587
Joined: Oct 2010

But happy you did...I Did not look any place...i found this about 2 1/2 yrs (this week is 3 yrs for me) after the fact...GOOD you thought to research and find a place for info from experince...

Posts: 6587
Joined: Oct 2010

how do this OLD comments pop up...I ONLY look at first page when sign on..I DO NOT go way back...i just realized I made comment on very old post...

Posts: 1
Joined: Mar 2017

I'm a 37 year old female with 3 kids. I had 2 biopies last week. I just found out yesterday that I have breast cancer. I see my surgeon tomorrow. Not sure what to expect. I know that have to see if it has spread or not but that's about all I know at this point. Anyone help me so I know what my next steps are. Don't really care for the surgeon that did the biopsy so not sure what to do

Puffin2014's picture
Posts: 534
Joined: Jun 2014

Hi Chrissy, you'll probably get more responses if you start your own new thread, this thread was started back in 2009.

Anyway, so sorry. I went through my biopsy and diagnosis in 2014, and I remember all the confusing feelings, some things happening so fast and others taking forever.

Be careful about researching online, there's a lot of bad information out there. This site is good,

Another website that my onc recommended was breastcancer.org and I have found it extremely helpful. Besides having excellent educational articles, their discussion forums are subdivided, so you can follow forums specifically for those who have had mastectomies, chemo, radiation, etc. I started with the lumpectomy forum, then moved to the chemo forum, then the radiation forum, and now am active on the Arimidex forum. Be sure and mark any forum you like as a favorite so it's easy to find again and easy to see when new responses have been added.

Another suggestion I'd have is to ask your Dr if it's OK that you record your appointments with your smart phone/iPod. They cover so much info it's hard to take it all in, and even having a second person with you isn't always the answer. Lew wasn't very good at taking notes. It was several months between my first visit with the radiologist and when I finally started radiation, and it was so helpful to go back and relisten to that first session.

It can be overwhelming to look at the whole picture, focus on learning about what you'll be doing next, don't look further down the road or you'll drive yourself nuts with all the "what if's".

Get copies of your pathology reports, you have a right to them.

Start a journal, to keep track of what Dr said, how you're feeling, what procedures you have done when. Write down your questions for the doctors and if you don't understand their answers make them explain it better. When you meet with your surgeon find out what his/her initial idea of stage and grade is, though you won't have a final stage and grade until after your surgery. Surgeon will explain the difference between having a lumpectomy vs a mastectomy. You'll want to ask if your tumor was estrogen positive and hers positive as that will affect your treatment options.

If you haven't been to the chat room on this site, check it out, that's where you can talk in real time to people, many of the gals in the chat room  have had breast cancer and can be a terrific support. The room is busiest in the evening.

Let us know what you learn.

Posts: 3660
Joined: Aug 2009

FryChrissy - until you posted on this thread - no one has posted for 6 yrs.  You would probably get more replies by starting a new Thread.

What type of BC -DCIS, IDC, ILC, IBC?    All BC is not the same or has the same prognosis or TX plans.    There are also variables within the type - Stage, grade, ER/PR status, HER2 status that all have an effect on the TX plan among other 'things'.  

In today's world, TX plans are varied. It is becoming more common for neoadjuvant (presurgery) chemo that has been the 'standard' for IBC, to be used with other types cor the best outcomes.  In other words - surgery is not always the first/best. TX.

It takes your Team (surgeon, chemo, rads) to work together for the optitimum care for each of us.

Winyan - The Power Withinn


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