Will sex ever feel good again? Questions after hysterectomy

misstaylor84
misstaylor84 Member Posts: 73 Member
edited April 2022 in Uterine/Endometrial Cancer #1

I got the go -ahead from my doctor at my 6 week post-op check up for having sex again but she said to wait one more week since I had some old brown discharge left in there. So I waited until a couple nights ago to have sex. Yesterday was week 8 of recovery. I was nervous because I didn't know if I would still have pain/discomfort anywhere, which I did not, until the following day lol. But it did not feel at all like it used to! I have also noticed that it just doesn't feel like I have any muscle tone in my abdomen. I feel like it's just mush in there. It's hard to explain but before, I was always aware of how my muscles felt in my abdominal area and now it just feels like my stomach is swollen or bloated.

When I had sex after surgery, it didn't hurt, but there was NO feeling at all, it seemed like. I enjoyed sex before and it is an important part of our relationship so I hate the thought that my stupid body is permanently broken and I will never enjoy sex again. For the last 2 weeks I have pretty much been doing everything I did before; raking leaves, doing things in the yard, etc and I feel fine.

I was able to keep my ovaries, btw.

Comments

  • ConnieSW
    ConnieSW Member Posts: 1,688 Member
    #2

    I was hoping there would be a positive report by now. For what it’s worth, here’s my experience. It isn’t the same as before. Orgasms build but don’t peak/release and the sensations are much less intense. If you spend time googling, you will find explanations of a sort. I believe the lack of uterine contractions is the issue for me. I also remember Alexandra believed women should be given the option of keeping their cervix if possible. I think she did.


    I am much older than you so hope maybe that is part of the issue and it will be better for you. And maybe you just need more time to heal and some apprehension is part of the problem. I think this is an important topic and hasn’t been well addressed by the medical community. None of this was addressed in my pre op teaching.

  • Harmanygroves
    Harmanygroves Member Posts: 487 Member
    #3
    https://csn.cancer.org/discussion/325016/will-sex-ever-feel-good-again-questions-after-hysterectomy

    Get as healthy as you can. The "mushy" feeling is probably your insides settling from being moved further south.

    Having a cervix seems to affect all the cool stuff that goes along with orgasms. My libido tanked after menopause, but some of my medical advisors suggested I give some accoutrements a try.

    So, I got this majorly spendy thing that's a supersonic vibrator device. It's pink, with gold details on it, and it's been pretty fun, ha ha!

    I'm still not doing "penetrative" sex with the hubs, but will try again soon when I'm feeling like it. I'm starting to use the dilator. I basically have to force myself to jam it in there and churn as though making butter. It's just a pain in the donkey, and it makes me angry.

    Do whatever you can to keep improving your health. As your body heals, your sex life will improve. Your body is furious with all the changes. Be reassured. It will get better.

  • Momschooling
    Momschooling Member Posts: 112 Member
    #4

    I am 12 weeks and can't even think about regular sex, I am still very sore in both pelvis and vaginally, I do have a lap (like a c section) though which might have made it worse. I have heard so many horror stories about the vaginal cuff I am in no rush at all lol and have set my goal at 6 months, I heard that dilators can help ease you into having sex again and the Oh Nut device. Remember even though outside looks minimal, inside all kinds of nerves/muscles were cut and this will take time to regain feeling, which may be why you don't feel much just yet. I am numb pretty much below belly button...yet I still have pain. You seem to be doing terrific for just 8 weeks!

  • marisolsfear
    marisolsfear Member Posts: 7 Member
    #5

    Did you ladies have your ovaries removed also?

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