I'm back!

serene

Hello everyone, it's been 10 months since I last checked the website and a lot has happened. I wrote last March after being diagnosed with a Melanoma recurrence, stage IV. I was really scared. I tried some alternative treatments with radiation and hyperthermia, however the tumor did not respond well to the treatment. There were some major complications, but amazingly the cancer did not spread beyond the abdominal area. I was very fortunate to find a surgeon who would operate at the John Wayne Cancer Center in Santa Monica. I had the surgery in the beginning of September, so it's been 4 months now. I have been taking Protocel. Does anyone know about this tonic? There are great testimonials on it and I pray that it works for me and that it is a real anti-cancer treatment. I will have a scan on January 15th. I have been enjoying life as much as possible, living every day the best as I can. I still have bills to pay and regular everyday life stuff, but I somehow just deal with it, even though I wish I didn't have to. I'm spending as much quality time with my daughter as possible. It's hard not being able to really make plans for the future, and just live for today. I have a new way of seeing things now and a great inner strength.
I can't rely on my 6th sense to tell me what the scan results will be and I'm losing sleep thinking about it. I am praying everyday to let God give me a chance to live longer so that I may be here for my daughter, and that I may have a chance to find my soumate because I have so much love to give.

blujae

Hi Serene, I understand totally about living day to day, never wanting to think of future plans and doing everything to ensure the kids are participating daily with me. It is hard for others to understand, but to me, it seems useless to want to take on a large project or change things drastically around the house or even paint a room. It is like I have lost myself. My treatments are over and all of the fallout from that have set in and I feel terrible most of the time, but I get up every morning and find a reason to do more. Good luck and may this be a better year.

Cam12

I just sent you a note of encouragment. Then I realized your note was from 2003. (I'm new at this site). The best part is I thought I was giving you encouragment, but your most recent note gave me encouragement. Also, when I sent the original note I wondered if you were a praying woman. Now I know. Isn't it wonderful how He connects us all together?
I am like you just living one day at a time. It's hard for others to understand that.
I will be praying for you for strength, courage, hope and that you will meet your soul mate.
I am here if you need to talk.