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So Sad

bruins1971's picture
Posts: 227
Joined: Nov 2010

So I was sending out my Christmas cards yesterday to include the ones I needed to send from our Christmas list on CSN. The part that made me sad was looking at the list and reading off to the side that they had died. Wow what a reality check and a slap in the face that one day any of us could be on that list. I quickly turned those sad thoughts around and focused on the fact that I was still alive and able to see my kids and wife each day. Funny the doctors told me I would be dead in less than six months if I didn't fight(which was not an option).

I am so ready to see 2010 get on out of here as it's been a crazy, long and hard year. First colon surgery then liver surgery with 12 rounds of chemotherapy on top of that. So yes just like many of you out there I am looking forward to 2011 and a fresh start(at least in my mind). Two rounds of chemo left one tomorrow and then one last one first week of January. Wow this will be a first as my 39th birthday is Wed the 15th and I will be wearing that lovely pump, lucky me.... But I will do whatever it takes to keep myself driving toward the end of this treatment plan. Funny how every little pain or twitch in your body can be cancer or at least that is what my mind tries to tell me. oops a little pain in my left side it must be cancer in the colon again. It's amazing what you mind will do to you if you let it run wild.

I hope everyone has a great day today and that we are one day closer to seeing a cure for all cancers so that nobody will ever have to suffer again.

God Bless
Bobby In Dallas

LivinginNH's picture
Posts: 1458
Joined: Apr 2010

Amen to that!

Friendinpenn's picture
Posts: 70
Joined: Oct 2010

Keep doing what you're doing....I have three chemos to go...next one on Wednesday...

THis is my third time...

I feel strong, people tell me how good I look considering the chemo and all...

and yes I think you have to keep the "fight attitude"

For several years now my wife and I sing and play the guitar for a group of children at a local club...

The last three years I sometimes thought it would be the last...but seeing those kids...(55 kids yesterdy) made me think I'm still on a "mision"

Things like that keep me fighting...

Your a good man as I've read many of your posts...Keep going pal...


Annabelle41415's picture
Posts: 6709
Joined: Feb 2009

Yes seeing the ones who have passed is very hard to deal with. We have such a family here and most of us have never meet but we are still concerned and happy and seem to grow with them and watch their journey. You have been through much too so you would want 2010 to get out of here. Hope you have a wonderful Christmas with you family and friends.


luv3jay's picture
Posts: 534
Joined: May 2009

I agree and I think that is why I have been dragging my feet on sending mine out. But I will muster up the strength to send them tomorrow because I do want everyone that is still here with us to know how much you guys mean to me and what a support you've been to me when no one else was. When everyone else was too caught up in their own lives or just didn't want to talk about it. So expect my well wishes soon!!


tootsie1's picture
Posts: 5065
Joined: Feb 2008


I know the fact that you're so young, and you have children, must cause cancer to weigh very heavily on your mind. And when we're confronted with the actual names of those from our group who have passed on, it can be a sobering and scary thing. Hang in there, man. You have so much to live for, and you CAN DO IT!


Nana b's picture
Nana b
Posts: 3045
Joined: May 2009

Yes, sad, but so glad the are on the list. That they just didn't disappear, but are thought of especially during this special time of the year. I thought of Donna as I wrote out every card! And of course Eric.

melo72's picture
Posts: 36
Joined: Aug 2009

Dear Bobby,

My mom was one of those who I lost her 3 month ago after 4 years fighting with cancer, but what I want to tell is that she was alive,happy and had hope untill the last minute...she was the best mom in the world and I'm greatful god gave me such a great mom for 38 years.

God blessed her soul
Love and pray for all of you guys here
I wish 2011 would be a year of cure for cancer:)

bruins1971's picture
Posts: 227
Joined: Nov 2010

I too lost my mother to cancer 8 years ago. She battled the demon for 18 years first breast then lung and finally pancreatic cancer all coming from the breast of a woman who never smoked and died at only 53 years old. Funny now her only son sits in the same boat fighting for his life. She was diagnosed at 35 me at 38 but I plan on being here when I'm 78. I'm so sorry for your lose but your lose is God's gain as your mom is now a guardian angel in Heaven at peace with God. No longer suffering the effects of this terrible disease. May god bless you and your family and may you have a blessed Christmas Season.

Bobby in Dallas

TMac52's picture
Posts: 358
Joined: Aug 2010

Bobby you are such an inspiration. I'm with you 2010 was a bad year and am looking forward to a new healing 2011, although i will be on mop up chemo until April.

Kenny H.'s picture
Kenny H.
Posts: 503
Joined: Aug 2010

X2 on 2010. Cant wait for it to be gone (bad yr) and on with 2011 and getting back to a normal routine. (God willing)

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