I've been busy admiring my body

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herdizziness
herdizziness CSN Member Posts: 3,624 Member
edited March 2014 in Colorectal Cancer #1
Yep, my date of a new scar is looming on the horizon.
And yes, my name is WOMAN, so hell yes I'm vain.
I'm thinking how great my tummy looks now (well, for the past few years of old age, I've been thinking otherwise, funny how cancer can change an attitude)and how I'm going to miss the "smoothness" of it.
I do this surgery for "life" but, well, can't a bit of regret sneak in?
Because it sure seems to. I've got another week with this body. I'm going to enjoy looking at it in the mirror while I can.
Winter Marie
«13

Comments

  • Kerry S
    Kerry S CSN Member Posts: 606 Member
    #2
    Take it from a real dirty old man
    Where you will get a new scar is not where us guys look. We look at the fun parts.

    Take it from a real dirty old man.

    Kerry
  • khl8
    khl8 CSN Member Posts: 807
    #3
    Kerry S said:

    Take it from a real dirty old man
    Where you will get a new scar is not where us guys look. We look at the fun parts.

    Take it from a real dirty old man.

    Kerry

    Kerry,
    Where were you when I
    Kerry,
    Where were you when I was having the same body image issues? You are great!
    Marie, my tummy looks like a roadmap, I have the resection scar, the illesotmy scar, and now a cricle of 8 small scars surrounding all of these, yea it sure is pretty. It is not like i was wearing bikini's anymore but the thought that no matter how firm I can get it, the days of midriff baring stuff is gone. But on the other hand, I have to look at the scars as war wounds and these scars have saved my life. So go on, be vain, you deserve it!!!

    Kathy
  • taraHK
    taraHK CSN Member Posts: 1,952 Member
    #4
    you are beautiful
    OK, I've never seen you in the flesh but this I can tell you -- you will still be beautiful with scars.

    Before my first surgery (not including my two cesarians!) I had a photographer come to my house and take nude photos of me. I'm kinda glad I did that!

    I've had several more surgeries since then -- I look like a road map! But I gotta tell you -- I'm pretty gorgeous! You too

    Tara
  • abrub
    abrub CSN Member Posts: 2,174 Member
    #5
    My scars had almost faded by
    My scars had almost faded by the time I had my hernia surgery in June - ah the joys of fresh scars! However, surgeons tend to use the same scar lines whenever possible, so I can hope that in another 3 years, the new scars will have faded.

    My hernia surgery was open, so they used the long scar, but I also got the circle of little scars to add to my collection, as they used those to stitch down the mesh. War wounds...

    Alice
  • bruins1971
    bruins1971 Member Posts: 227
    #6
    I must have missed the post.
    I must have missed the post. What type of surgery are you getting and what day?
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    #7
    bruins1971 said:

    I must have missed the post.
    I must have missed the post. What type of surgery are you getting and what day?

    This comment has been removed by the Moderator
  • christinecarl
    christinecarl CSN Member Posts: 544 Member
    #8
    Not vain
    I can understand the struggle with the scars and body image. Lets face it, the surgery scars from cancer are not those cute little scars that lead to an amusing story, about some little misadventure you had while out drinking with your buddies. They are huge, can change the place of your belly button, I am now crooked. Being single adds a different part to it too, I feel like I need to warn people first. When I am out on a date I think, when should I tell them, it is such a big part of who I am, yet does not define me. ugh....sigh.
  • Nana b
    Nana b CSN Member Posts: 3,030 Member
    #9
    christinecarl said:

    Not vain
    I can understand the struggle with the scars and body image. Lets face it, the surgery scars from cancer are not those cute little scars that lead to an amusing story, about some little misadventure you had while out drinking with your buddies. They are huge, can change the place of your belly button, I am now crooked. Being single adds a different part to it too, I feel like I need to warn people first. When I am out on a date I think, when should I tell them, it is such a big part of who I am, yet does not define me. ugh....sigh.

    OMG Christine!
    Christine, you mean you have sex and aren't married! OMG!!! Ha, HA! I am glad I am married and don't have deal with that. I know it has to be tough for you. I have to tell this funny story.

    My sister called, today to tell me that the soup was ready to come over, so in a rush not to keep her waiting, I decided to change out one PJ into another (have been under the weather and laying around). I took out the warmest PG pants I had and started to put them on, when realized I forgot my panties. I took a step forward to pull up my pants when I realized that I had both feet in one leg, and bang I fell forward onto my knees and wrists/hands. I had not pulled up my pants yet so I was a lovely sight, kneeling there on all fours. I broke out into a hysterical laugh. I mean I was snorting and all. My hands had went numb and I could not get right up. So, my husband runs in to see what the commotion is all about and starts cracking up! As he is helping me up and looking at me funny and I ask him, what are you looking at, my stomach? He replies, "honey, I would cover my **** before I started asking about my stomach. So we had a great laugh...then went and had soup!
  • herdizziness
    herdizziness CSN Member Posts: 3,624 Member
    #10
    Nana b said:

    OMG Christine!
    Christine, you mean you have sex and aren't married! OMG!!! Ha, HA! I am glad I am married and don't have deal with that. I know it has to be tough for you. I have to tell this funny story.

    My sister called, today to tell me that the soup was ready to come over, so in a rush not to keep her waiting, I decided to change out one PJ into another (have been under the weather and laying around). I took out the warmest PG pants I had and started to put them on, when realized I forgot my panties. I took a step forward to pull up my pants when I realized that I had both feet in one leg, and bang I fell forward onto my knees and wrists/hands. I had not pulled up my pants yet so I was a lovely sight, kneeling there on all fours. I broke out into a hysterical laugh. I mean I was snorting and all. My hands had went numb and I could not get right up. So, my husband runs in to see what the commotion is all about and starts cracking up! As he is helping me up and looking at me funny and I ask him, what are you looking at, my stomach? He replies, "honey, I would cover my **** before I started asking about my stomach. So we had a great laugh...then went and had soup!

    OMG!!
    You mean you have sex and your married???? Please let my husband know about this!!!
    Immediately!!!! It's been, well, hell, can't count that high, since.
    Winter Marie
  • herdizziness
    herdizziness CSN Member Posts: 3,624 Member
    #11
    christinecarl said:

    Not vain
    I can understand the struggle with the scars and body image. Lets face it, the surgery scars from cancer are not those cute little scars that lead to an amusing story, about some little misadventure you had while out drinking with your buddies. They are huge, can change the place of your belly button, I am now crooked. Being single adds a different part to it too, I feel like I need to warn people first. When I am out on a date I think, when should I tell them, it is such a big part of who I am, yet does not define me. ugh....sigh.

    Christine
    Your words, said it all, "Ugh, sigh". That's my feelings. The eloquence is in the simplicity of the words.
    Thanks sister.
    Winter Marie
  • Nana b
    Nana b CSN Member Posts: 3,030 Member
    #12
    herdizziness said:

    OMG!!
    You mean you have sex and your married???? Please let my husband know about this!!!
    Immediately!!!! It's been, well, hell, can't count that high, since.
    Winter Marie

    It's not an
    It's not an option.....mandatory! :)
  • herdizziness
    herdizziness CSN Member Posts: 3,624 Member
    #13
    Kerry S said:

    Take it from a real dirty old man
    Where you will get a new scar is not where us guys look. We look at the fun parts.

    Take it from a real dirty old man.

    Kerry

    LOL
    I think my hubby needs lessons on being a Dirty Old Man, I'm thinking I would like that. ROFLMAO!!!
    Thanks Kerry you always know what to say to cheer me up!!!
    Now if Buzzard would just chime in, I'd go to surgery feeling like a W O M A N!!!
    LOL,
    Loves,
    Winter Marie
  • herdizziness
    herdizziness CSN Member Posts: 3,624 Member
    #14
    bruins1971 said:

    I must have missed the post.
    I must have missed the post. What type of surgery are you getting and what day?

    Surgery
    It's a happenin on the 20th, removing right side colon, left lobe of liver, a small part some where near the kidney, possible ovaries, radiation, 4 surgeons operating on different parts, and one on stand by. Should be quite the circus.
    Winter Marie
  • herdizziness
    herdizziness CSN Member Posts: 3,624 Member
    #15
    unknown said:

    This comment has been removed by the Moderator

    Graci
    My dear, thank you for reminding me, I'm not exactly going to be wearing a bikini, LMAO, haven't done that in 20 years!!!
    I'm sure it will be a success, but as you understand, our vanity comes forward from time to time.
    Thank you for your best wishes!!!
    Winter Marie
  • AnneCan
    AnneCan CSN Member Posts: 3,673 Member
    #16
    herdizziness said:

    LOL
    I think my hubby needs lessons on being a Dirty Old Man, I'm thinking I would like that. ROFLMAO!!!
    Thanks Kerry you always know what to say to cheer me up!!!
    Now if Buzzard would just chime in, I'd go to surgery feeling like a W O M A N!!!
    LOL,
    Loves,
    Winter Marie

    You are a W O M A N!!
    And you will come out an improved version!
  • kristasplace
    kristasplace CSN Member Posts: 957 Member
    #17
    christinecarl said:

    Not vain
    I can understand the struggle with the scars and body image. Lets face it, the surgery scars from cancer are not those cute little scars that lead to an amusing story, about some little misadventure you had while out drinking with your buddies. They are huge, can change the place of your belly button, I am now crooked. Being single adds a different part to it too, I feel like I need to warn people first. When I am out on a date I think, when should I tell them, it is such a big part of who I am, yet does not define me. ugh....sigh.

    Can totally relate, Christine
    I'm also single and dating right now. Being a stage IV, i sometimes feel awkward calling myself a survivor since of course i haven't been given an NED, or remission diagnosis. That part is worse for me than describing the scars, which i stopped doing. So many men lose interest after they hear the cancer part, that if they stick around after hearing that, i'm not going to push it by describing my scars! lol
  • herdizziness
    herdizziness CSN Member Posts: 3,624 Member
    #18
    khl8 said:

    Kerry,
    Where were you when I
    Kerry,
    Where were you when I was having the same body image issues? You are great!
    Marie, my tummy looks like a roadmap, I have the resection scar, the illesotmy scar, and now a cricle of 8 small scars surrounding all of these, yea it sure is pretty. It is not like i was wearing bikini's anymore but the thought that no matter how firm I can get it, the days of midriff baring stuff is gone. But on the other hand, I have to look at the scars as war wounds and these scars have saved my life. So go on, be vain, you deserve it!!!

    Kathy

    Thank you
    I'm glad some agrees that I have the right to be vain!!! Because well, truthfully, I am.
    I'll be glad my life is saved for somewhat longer and these scars will bear that, but, dang, I wish I didn't have to. You understand.
    Winter Marie
  • herdizziness
    herdizziness CSN Member Posts: 3,624 Member
    #19
    abrub said:

    My scars had almost faded by
    My scars had almost faded by the time I had my hernia surgery in June - ah the joys of fresh scars! However, surgeons tend to use the same scar lines whenever possible, so I can hope that in another 3 years, the new scars will have faded.

    My hernia surgery was open, so they used the long scar, but I also got the circle of little scars to add to my collection, as they used those to stitch down the mesh. War wounds...

    Alice

    Alice
    You were the first person I think I ever spoke to on this web site. You have a special place in my heart.
    War wounds, exactly, damn it, it's a vicious war.
    Winter Marie
  • Nana b
    Nana b CSN Member Posts: 3,030 Member
    #20
    kristasplace said:

    Can totally relate, Christine
    I'm also single and dating right now. Being a stage IV, i sometimes feel awkward calling myself a survivor since of course i haven't been given an NED, or remission diagnosis. That part is worse for me than describing the scars, which i stopped doing. So many men lose interest after they hear the cancer part, that if they stick around after hearing that, i'm not going to push it by describing my scars! lol

    You're right about the
    You're right about the cancer part, that really sucks, and you are both gorgeous girls, so unfair! But you know have some fun, be careful, and live your life. You can be happy, and you find someone that is as strong as you...because you are no longer just a pretty girl!

    Hugs!
  • Lori-S
    Lori-S CSN Member Posts: 1,277 Member
    #21
    Winter Marie
    I had an open resection and that scar runs from my pubic bone to about 2.5 inches above my belly button. Dang! It even looks like I have 2 belly buttons now because the scar from the first staple was so deep. I look in the mirror and get confused about how high my pants are suppose to be! And because of the scar and my damn hernia ... like it says on my about me page .... my belly button is now crooked and a bit off center - kinda like my mind.

    So, with that great scar I have the colostomy (which I can hardly wait to get rid of) which shall I say definitely interfers with my self imagine. It's not just vanity. It's also a reminder of the cancer so it holds that power too. I know some call them battle scars.
    But, I'd rather not be reminded of the battle that often.

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