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Should I be annoyed

Sonia32's picture
Posts: 1078
Joined: Mar 2009

....or should I just let it go. I'm stage 3, 10/11 lymph nodes infected (diagnosed in feb 09), in remission for now (touch wood my forehead). Found out today through my surgeons notes that I had not just the colon cancer but I had a small well differentiated carcinoid in the appendix. I was not told about the latter, trying to find out if it was benign or cancerous. So I had two tumours removed for the price of one. Makes me think that in England you really should check your notes, or ask your doctor through questions. Just feeling a bit blah, to boot found out it's a rare tumour as well, only found through surgery.

Also IBS is playing up so on buscopan for that, it does seem to be helping. Finding black specks in my stool (will ask my gp about it), and it's coming up to a year on the 8th dec when the ex said goodbye. But I know through all this, you have all been here for me and I'm not just saying that. And I am so grateful to each and everyone of you.

Anyway thank you for letting me ramble

christinecarl's picture
Posts: 545
Joined: Sep 2009

So did they take out your Appendix then or just the tumor? After I woke up from my colon resection surgery, my surgeon told me she took out my appendix too, not because there were issues with it, but she said it is just a trouble maker and it helped her look around better with it gone. I was like um ok, not like they can put in back now LOL. I hope everything is ok with you and the stool issues are nothing. It is always scary anytime you have even a bit of blood, hard not to freak out about it. About the ex situation, one year wow, try to focus on how far you have come since then. I know it is hard around the holidays, but he is just one less person in your life that did not deserve to be there, good riddance to those people.



idlehunters's picture
Posts: 1792
Joined: Apr 2009

Ya... I agree with Chris....good riddance to the schmuck!!!! His MAJOR loss! Do you get out and meet other men? Or are you not ready for that? You are a beautiful woman with an awesome personality and don't you think any different. You are waaay up here ----- see...look Sonia.... WAAAY up here ----- Now look down________ see him...there's the loser schmuck...yep...waaaay DOWN there_______ step on it..squish it....kick it to the curb.... ahhhh ...there...now be done with that and move on....life is too short! Love ya girl!


Sonia32's picture
Posts: 1078
Joined: Mar 2009

Love the way you and Chris put it to me. Awww be lost without you guys on here. Hehe just visualising squishing him lol. Thank you for the sweet things you said, it's taken me a while to believe in myself again, as he took that away from me. Still have issues of him going on in my head, that you haven't done your hair right, not eating right, not wearing the right clothes and on and on, thinking of kids in the hall now squishing him again.lol Awww sending love back to you

Posts: 810
Joined: Nov 2009

Listen to them and to what I have told you! He is not worth it! Are you saying the things I told you to in the mirror??? I cannot repeat them here as you well know!

Love to you,

Sonia32's picture
Posts: 1078
Joined: Mar 2009

Lol I don't know what they did, my sister rang my cancer nurse as she got really angry when I told her. The nurse is trying to find my records and will look it up. And I know I have come so far, that because of people like you, and my csn family which you are part of. :-)


dianetavegia's picture
Posts: 1953
Joined: Mar 2009

A type of tumor usually found in the gastrointestinal system (most often in the appendix), and sometimes in the lungs or other sites. Carcinoid tumors are usually benign.

Posts: 3692
Joined: Oct 2009

Then try to let it go (ususally easier said than done). As my first onc wisely said + he didn't have too mich wise to say, IMO, "You can't keep looking back, you have to go from where you are now". LOOK where you are now, young, gorgeous, NED, shook loose the no-good-nick etc., etc. I know it is a cliche but you found out his true colours early in the game, rather than with kids, + the finacial issues that come with them. I wish all goodness going forward.

tootsie1's picture
Posts: 5056
Joined: Feb 2008

I'd feel a little annoyed about that, too. You hope when you have cancer the doctors will tell you everything. I'm sorry yours didn't. I have IBS as well, and I take a probiotic every day, plus Miralax twice a day. Didn't have to take anything on a regular basis before I had the colon resection!

I'm sure you are thinking a lot about things since it's almost a year since your breakup. It's easy for us to say good riddance, but I know you might have mixed feelings about that.

Praying you feel better soon.


Posts: 1154
Joined: Jun 2010

I have I BS since I was 14. It was the downside of being conscious about my grades so that i could get the heck out of that small town i lived in. Anyway I get black specks in my poop too. I had my colonoscopy and it was clear, but let me know what you find out about that. PM me. I'm curious.

Posts: 1154
Joined: Jun 2010

I have I BS since I was 14. It was the downside of being conscious about my grades so that i could get the heck out of that small town i lived in. Anyway I get black specks in my poop too. I had my colonoscopy and it was clear, but let me know what you find out about that. PM me. I'm curious.

lisa42's picture
Posts: 3661
Joined: Jul 2008

Hi Sonia,

I would be very annoyed that doctors kept info such as this from me! I think my first reaction would be that I'd like to discuss it with my onc and make sure everything was told to me from now on! Other than that, you do have to let it go, cause you don't want to waste too much energy on feeling angry! But that is pretty bad that they never told you. The same with the ex- try not to waste too much of your energy on thoughts of him. Easier said than done, I'm sure, but you've got to focus on your future. You DO have a good future coming still. I know how much cancer has robbed you, but you're still young, and NED- time to get out there and get going on life! I know you are doing all you can, but maybe you can even stretch yourself to get out there and get involved with new people, find a good church (as you had mentioned in the past to me you wanted to do), take a fun class or two- exercise class, painting, or whatever!

So far as the IBS, if you haven't already, start taking a good probiotic or two. I have really seen the benefits of them & think I'd have a fairly normal bowel if it weren't for the chemo (I got back to "normal/regular" one the two week chemo vacation I had).

Praying for you, my friend. :)


geotina's picture
Posts: 2122
Joined: Oct 2009

Your ex bailed when the going got tough and I'm sorry for that. Try and look at it another way, if it wasn't cancer it would have been something else. Nothing in life is guaranteed, life will never be perfect, and it sounds from past posts that he wanted everything perfect. His loss. He will be wasting his life and and precious years will pass looking for perfection and will lose in the end.

You, on the other hand, got cancer, beat it, and have a whole new perspective on life and how to enjoy it. Do it. Go out and enjoy being alive. Do and see things that make you smile. Don't waste time and life for the years go by way too fast.

Hugs - Tina

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