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Made me mad

tootsie1's picture
tootsie1
Posts: 5056
Joined: Feb 2008

I was watching the Today Show this morning, the one where Hoda and Kathy Lee are on. I think they were discussing Michael Douglas, I do know it was about someone who had cancer. I was only halfway listening until Kathy Lee made a statement that I hear often from people who have not had cancer: "Yeah, attitude is everything. It really makes a difference." Guess what? Sometimes people have the best attitude you've ever known, and they still die from cancer! Some people are very cantankerous (love you, Kerry!), and they're hanging in there like nobody's business. Knock it off! When you tell cancer patients that their attitude will make all the difference, that's too big a burden. They already have enough going on! Don't make them responsible for their cure, only if they can smile enough and say all the right things.

Okay, I'm done! I feel better! I'm suffering from a yucky virus, and I'm NOT exhibiting that great attitude I'm supposed to have, and I've been stewing about this all day!

*hugs*
Gail

Kerry S's picture
Kerry S
Posts: 607
Joined: Dec 2009

Gail,
This is funny. Back 27 years ago when I was in the drunk farm, we drunks found that we could call each other drunks and it was OK. But God forbid a sober person call us a drunk.

I think it is just that the people that have never had cancer touch them deeply as we have can’t project the feelings we have.

Now get that attitude back where the hell it belongs.

Love ya right back
Kerry

tootsie1's picture
tootsie1
Posts: 5056
Joined: Feb 2008

Aw, Kerry.

You're too sweet. *L*

*hugs*
Gail

herdizziness's picture
herdizziness
Posts: 3642
Joined: Apr 2010

I'm writing her a letter today. LOL, poor child, she just doesn't know, she is babbling what she's heard, we'll just have to set her straight!!!
LMAO, I love you girl!!!
Winter Marie

Lovekitties's picture
Lovekitties
Posts: 3355
Joined: Jan 2010

He has the answer...if you or your loved one has walked in my shoes, you can pretty much say anything because I know you truely understand.

So sorry that you have a virus, hope you feel better soon.

Hugs,

Marie

mukamom's picture
mukamom
Posts: 402
Joined: Oct 2010

People mag had an article about Dr Oz (what a quack), in which he was talking about having a colonoscopy done and they found a polyp and how lucky he was to have found this so early..because if it goes thru the lining of the colon "you're a goner". I could not believe this "doctor" would make such a statement. I stewed about this..and fired a letter off to People mag blasting Dr Oz. I am sure glad my husbands cancer team don't have this attitude or he would be a goner. Still boils my blood when I think about it.

Hope you feeling better

Angela

khl8
Posts: 810
Joined: Nov 2009

NO way!!! Obviously she has not had to deal with all th crap that comes with this disease!!! But Gail, don't let her ingorance bring you down! You are this bubbly little person that I look forward to hearing about!!! She is not worth it!!!!

Hugs,
Kathy

KathiM's picture
KathiM
Posts: 8077
Joined: Aug 2005

Attitude can keep you out of a depression...and keep you fighting the fight...BUT...

It isn't a be all/end all...at the end of the day, there are so many factors....'naughty or nice'...

I think for those who have not been touched by cancer, it's a way of hope for themselves...if they should end up with cancer, they are hoping that the 'easy answer' is attitude!!!

Gail, I'm sending healing vibes that you feel better soon!!!....I have been struggling with bronchitis for about 3 weeks...YUCK!!!

Hugs, Kathi

geotina's picture
geotina
Posts: 2122
Joined: Oct 2009

They have a facebook page. Perhaps those on facebook can send her a message for the whole world to see. If enough send her a message, perhaps an apology will be forthcoming.

I really gota join facebook one of these days.

Take care all - Tina

thxmiker's picture
thxmiker
Posts: 1282
Joined: Oct 2010

After Kathy was found to have child labor making her clothing several times. She is just a sell out. Send her a message, and stop watching her show. She makes money every time people watch her make an *** out of herself.

My two cents.
mike

tootsie1's picture
tootsie1
Posts: 5056
Joined: Feb 2008

Okay, I'm better now! *L* Mentally, that is. Still coughing like a fool, and my sinuses need somebody to take a drill to them. But I'm no longer mad. People, ignorant though their comments may be, mean well. *takes in a deep breath and thinks forgiving thoughts*

Y'all be good! Now you know I have a touch of Irish temper now and again!

*hugs*
Gail

Lori-S's picture
Lori-S
Posts: 1286
Joined: Sep 2010

I sure hope you're feeling better soon. Feeling crappy doesn't help with the mental stuff.

LivinginNH's picture
LivinginNH
Posts: 1458
Joined: Apr 2010

I hope that you're feeling better soon - HUGS! Cynthia

okthen's picture
okthen
Posts: 232
Joined: Jun 2010

"When you tell cancer patients that their attitude will make all the difference, that's too big a burden. They already have enough going on! Don't make them responsible for their cure, only if they can smile enough and say all the right things."

Gail, you said so perfectly what I've wanted to say soooo many times to a certain someone who tells us all the time that we are creating our own destiny and being upset is only making the cancer stronger. GRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!! Even said that my hubby probably got his cancer back when he was so mad at his boss. HUH?!
Im sorry, but you try to look cancer in the face and never have a weak moment, watch your loved one be sick and hurting after surgery and chemo and keep on smiling, cuz if I don't then I am creating more sickness. UGH!!
Wow, I guess I really let that out. (o: It's just so hard to listen and not blow up sometimes...I think the way you said it is a perfect way to stop the suggestion that we brought, and are bringing this on ourselves because we are not skipping around the yard with rainbows over our heads.
Thanks for the opportunity to vent. (o:
Chriss

lizdeli's picture
lizdeli
Posts: 570
Joined: Jul 2009

I hear that all the time from people that don't have cancer. "Attitude is everything". I agree that for ME keeping upbeat helps me deal with the stress. But I think our good attitudes are more improtant to those that dont' have the cancer than it is for us. I think it gets them off the hook. If we are upbeat then it's not too uncomfortable for them to deal with our emotions. Don't get me wrong, I strive to stay positive. But as you all know, there are days when I am overcome with fear or anxiety - comes out of nowehere. When that happens some people make me feel guilty for expressing those emotions. They just don't understand if they haven't gone through it. Honestly, I hope they never have to go through it. I'd rather deal with their unknowing impression of what it is like to go through it than to to have it happen to them.

Liz

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