Do you really think it can be beat?

13

Comments

  • thready
    thready Member Posts: 474
    Can we Beat this thing?
    I have been out of treatment for a bit over 3 months now. I also wonder if we can beat cancer, but I have come to the conclusions that we need to live life to the fullest no matter what. I was hesitant to move forward, thinking I would wait until my 6 month scans, but then through a few minor setbacks I came to realize that if I don't go forward I might miss the best part, now I am making plans, looking at the future, and living each day.

    Bernie Mack was interviewed a short time before he passed away and he said you never know, it could be here today-gone today so live today because we never know. I think this is great advise.
  • thready
    thready Member Posts: 474
    Kerry S said:

    Can I beat this crap?
    Can I beat this crap? Hell yes! Am I going to let this crap keep me in a constant depression mode? Hell no! I have a wife that needs me along with my 2 sons and their families. Plus, I just damn well enjoy living.

    Any time you feel like it is all over but the shouting, give yourself the Golden Shovel Award. Known as the GSA. I wish we had a box on our post that others could check when they read a GSA post. When the box gets checked more then 10 times you would be required to seek professional help.

    What you do with this award is go out in your back yard and start digging your own grave. Just maybe when your hands start blistering and your back gets weak you will realize it is much easier to have and keep a positive attitude. No one ever accomplished anything with a negative attitude.

    I was told a long time back that you can put your emotions into four boxes. Mad, sad, glad or scared. At the start of this cancer mess I was just “scared”. I then turned to “mad” as hell. Now I am “glad” that I am still alive along with enough “mad” to keep fighting it.

    I will admit I have had to give myself a GSA here and there in my journey. However, I can use my tractor to dig the damn grave. That makes it a lot easier. I am too damned old to dig it by hand.

    Keep coming here
    Kerry,
    Keep coming here! (Awesome info!)
    Thanks Jan
  • KathiM
    KathiM Member Posts: 8,028 Member
    Kerry S said:

    Can I beat this crap?
    Can I beat this crap? Hell yes! Am I going to let this crap keep me in a constant depression mode? Hell no! I have a wife that needs me along with my 2 sons and their families. Plus, I just damn well enjoy living.

    Any time you feel like it is all over but the shouting, give yourself the Golden Shovel Award. Known as the GSA. I wish we had a box on our post that others could check when they read a GSA post. When the box gets checked more then 10 times you would be required to seek professional help.

    What you do with this award is go out in your back yard and start digging your own grave. Just maybe when your hands start blistering and your back gets weak you will realize it is much easier to have and keep a positive attitude. No one ever accomplished anything with a negative attitude.

    I was told a long time back that you can put your emotions into four boxes. Mad, sad, glad or scared. At the start of this cancer mess I was just “scared”. I then turned to “mad” as hell. Now I am “glad” that I am still alive along with enough “mad” to keep fighting it.

    I will admit I have had to give myself a GSA here and there in my journey. However, I can use my tractor to dig the damn grave. That makes it a lot easier. I am too damned old to dig it by hand.

    GREAT attitude!!!
    You ole' coot!!!!

    I have this pic in my mind now of you driving a golden TRACTOR, digging it....ROFL!

    Hugs, Kathi
  • KathiM
    KathiM Member Posts: 8,028 Member

    Cancer… It’s never really gone
    Cancer… It’s never really gone

    It hits me when I’m at the park with my kids. It hits me sometimes late at night. It hits me when I see the sun set at the end of the day. It hits me when driving along listening to music. Sometimes even hits be when I’m gong to the bathroom. Cancer is never really gone from our thoughts and that’s the rough part of this fight. But I have today while many of my friends don’t. It reminds me of something I read. It was about this father taking one of his little boys to the park.

    ~ While at the park one day, a woman sat down next to a man on a bench near a playground. "That's my son over there," she said, pointing to a little boy in a red sweater who was gliding down the slide. "He's a fine looking boy" the man said. "That's my son on the swing in the blue sweater."

    Then, looking at his watch, he called to his son. "What do you say we go, Todd?" Todd pleaded, "Just five more minutes, Dad. Please? Just five more minutes."

    The man nodded and Todd continued to swing to his heart's content. Minutes passed and the father stood and called again to his son. "Time to go now?" Again Todd pleaded, "Five more minutes, Dad. Just five more minutes." The man smiled and said, "O.K."

    "My, you certainly are a patient father," the woman responded.

    The man smiled and then said, "My older son Tommy was killed by a drunk driver last year while he was riding his bike near here. I never spent much time with Tommy and now I'd give anything for just five more minutes with him. I've vowed not to make the same mistake with Todd. He thinks he has five more minutes to swing. The truth is, I get Five more minutes to watch him play."


    I just want to stay around for my family for 5 more minutes

    LOVE the story!!!
    ...I got my '5 more minutes' with my daughter before she died...it was Christmas...I hold it forever...

    Hugs, Kathi
  • dorookie
    dorookie Member Posts: 1,731 Member

    Cancer… It’s never really gone
    Cancer… It’s never really gone

    It hits me when I’m at the park with my kids. It hits me sometimes late at night. It hits me when I see the sun set at the end of the day. It hits me when driving along listening to music. Sometimes even hits be when I’m gong to the bathroom. Cancer is never really gone from our thoughts and that’s the rough part of this fight. But I have today while many of my friends don’t. It reminds me of something I read. It was about this father taking one of his little boys to the park.

    ~ While at the park one day, a woman sat down next to a man on a bench near a playground. "That's my son over there," she said, pointing to a little boy in a red sweater who was gliding down the slide. "He's a fine looking boy" the man said. "That's my son on the swing in the blue sweater."

    Then, looking at his watch, he called to his son. "What do you say we go, Todd?" Todd pleaded, "Just five more minutes, Dad. Please? Just five more minutes."

    The man nodded and Todd continued to swing to his heart's content. Minutes passed and the father stood and called again to his son. "Time to go now?" Again Todd pleaded, "Five more minutes, Dad. Just five more minutes." The man smiled and said, "O.K."

    "My, you certainly are a patient father," the woman responded.

    The man smiled and then said, "My older son Tommy was killed by a drunk driver last year while he was riding his bike near here. I never spent much time with Tommy and now I'd give anything for just five more minutes with him. I've vowed not to make the same mistake with Todd. He thinks he has five more minutes to swing. The truth is, I get Five more minutes to watch him play."


    I just want to stay around for my family for 5 more minutes

    WOW
    Made me cry too, WOW what a wonderful way to look at things.
  • dorookie
    dorookie Member Posts: 1,731 Member
    Christine
    I am curious after hearing all of this, what do you think now?

    Beth
  • Kathleen808
    Kathleen808 Member Posts: 2,342 Member
    lesvanb said:

    Birth has a poor prognosis
    well said Phil and Kathi and Aud et al

    and we're all skating on thin ice whether we are living with cancer...or not. Usually when pondering things like life and death, I enjoy reading poetry. Mary Oliver is one of my favorite poets because I like how she doesn't beat around the bush.

    When Death Comes by Mary Oliver

    When death comes
    like the hungry bear in autumn;
    when death comes and takes all the bright coins from his purse

    to buy me, and snaps the purse shut;
    when death comes
    like the measle-pox

    when death comes
    like an iceberg between the shoulder blades,

    I want to step through the door full of curiosity, wondering:
    what is it going to be like, that cottage of darkness?

    And therefore I look upon everything
    as a brotherhood and a sisterhood,
    and I look upon time as no more than an idea,
    and I consider eternity as another possibility,

    and I think of each life as a flower, as common
    as a field daisy, and as singular,

    and each name a comfortable music in the mouth,
    tending, as all music does, toward silence,

    and each body a lion of courage, and something
    precious to the earth.

    When it's over, I want to say all my life
    I was a bride married to amazement.
    I was the bridegroom, taking the world into my arms.

    When it's over, I don't want to wonder
    if I have made of my life something particular, and real.

    I don't want to find myself sighing and frightened,
    or full of argument.

    I don't want to end up simply having visited this world.


    With much love and respect, Leslie

    Leslie
    Leslie,
    Thank you for sharing that poem. It really says so much about life.

    Aloha,
    Kathleen
  • dorookie said:

    Christine
    I am curious after hearing all of this, what do you think now?

    Beth

    This comment has been removed by the Moderator
  • Kerry S
    Kerry S Member Posts: 606 Member
    unknown said:

    This comment has been removed by the Moderator

    I am not a vet
    Graci,

    Darlin you read that wrong. I am not a vet. We call the hospital down here in the country the “vet clinic”.

    Before I retired, I was the director of customer service for a major credit card brand.

    Kerry
  • thready
    thready Member Posts: 474
    KathiM said:

    I raise my glass....
    Yup, I agree with you, phil....

    As you know, both of my cancers (rectal followed closely by breast) were in the lymph system. No far mets..but, well, plently of 'dust bunnies'.

    I fought long and hard for the opportunity to live life...so I AM living it!!! Let tomorrow take care of itself! That said, I watch what I eat, don't smoke, and drink plenty of water...I laugh every day, and try not to stress about stuff, as I used to...

    Can it return? Of course, but, again, I'm not thinking too much about it...

    Hugs, Kathi

    Like how you put it
    Kathi,
    I like what you said, we all should live life to the fullest, and the fight was a tough one so more of a reason to live life.

    Jan
  • jams67
    jams67 Member Posts: 925 Member
    Post Tramatic Stress
    PTS is what most of us have. Most of us have been through or are going through hell. On the other side you are left with a shell of a person who has to be put back together emotionally and physically. No wonder at times our emotions are a little shaky. Once when saying the Lord's Prayer, it dawned on me "Thy will be done" and then I quit worrying about the "what ifs" of life. We never know, let God worry about it. We could die being run over by a truck. Just enjoy your life and always "look forward...
    Jo Ann
  • PhillieG
    PhillieG Member Posts: 4,866 Member
    eric38 said:

    Phil
    I agree. It is hard to come to grips with your own mortality but I believe the only way to truly heal is to get yourself in a spiritual and mental state where you are not afraid to die. I realize this is a lot easier said than done
    Also, statistics do not apply to individuals and you never know what can happen. A perfectly healthy person could walk out he door today and get hit by a bus. There are people who are diagnosed with stage 4 cancer and don't live more than six weeks after their diagnosis and others who beat it or live way beyond anybodys expectations. You just have to do your best to enjoy the time you have because you never know.

    Hi Eric
    You are so right, it IS easier said than done. I certainly have days when it's really hard to have a good attitude and as it turns out, I have a crappy attitude that day and sometimes a few days. I usually can snap out of it and do not stay in a funk for too long, just as long as I need to I suppose. When I first heard those words "you have cancer..." I thought the worst and thought I'd be dead sooner than later. As it's turning out it's becoming later than I ever expected and it's not been as bad as it could have been either. It's all relative too I think. What is tolerable for one person may put another over the edge. I have surprised myself at times and I also get people asking me "how do I do it?". When you have few (if any) options it's quite easy I found. It might be like shopping in the old Soviet Union. You have 1 brand of crackers. It's real easy to choose what kind you want then.
    ;-

    I still have little kids (16 & 10) I don't want to go anywhere anytime soon but I know that someday, ready or not I'll be gone. Like you said Eric, "You just have to do your best to enjoy the time you have because you never know."
  • herdizziness
    herdizziness Member Posts: 3,624 Member
    KathiM said:

    I raise my glass....
    Yup, I agree with you, phil....

    As you know, both of my cancers (rectal followed closely by breast) were in the lymph system. No far mets..but, well, plently of 'dust bunnies'.

    I fought long and hard for the opportunity to live life...so I AM living it!!! Let tomorrow take care of itself! That said, I watch what I eat, don't smoke, and drink plenty of water...I laugh every day, and try not to stress about stuff, as I used to...

    Can it return? Of course, but, again, I'm not thinking too much about it...

    Hugs, Kathi

    Love the picture! I have
    Love the picture! I have one close to it when we visited Spain. Such a fairy land that Guady built.
  • AnneCan
    AnneCan Member Posts: 3,673 Member
    PhillieG said:

    Hi Eric
    You are so right, it IS easier said than done. I certainly have days when it's really hard to have a good attitude and as it turns out, I have a crappy attitude that day and sometimes a few days. I usually can snap out of it and do not stay in a funk for too long, just as long as I need to I suppose. When I first heard those words "you have cancer..." I thought the worst and thought I'd be dead sooner than later. As it's turning out it's becoming later than I ever expected and it's not been as bad as it could have been either. It's all relative too I think. What is tolerable for one person may put another over the edge. I have surprised myself at times and I also get people asking me "how do I do it?". When you have few (if any) options it's quite easy I found. It might be like shopping in the old Soviet Union. You have 1 brand of crackers. It's real easy to choose what kind you want then.
    ;-

    I still have little kids (16 & 10) I don't want to go anywhere anytime soon but I know that someday, ready or not I'll be gone. Like you said Eric, "You just have to do your best to enjoy the time you have because you never know."

    Phil
    I find your words to be pure inspiration for me. You show people how to live with cancer + your attitude + sense of humour are really helping me on this journey. Thanks!
  • KathiM
    KathiM Member Posts: 8,028 Member

    Love the picture! I have
    Love the picture! I have one close to it when we visited Spain. Such a fairy land that Guady built.

    I agree....I like the parc the best....
    The church was a bit overwhelming...but beautiful, as well!

    Hugs, Kathi

    (It was so HOT that day!!!...I was really using the fan...my beau just happened to catch it just right!)
  • Nana b
    Nana b Member Posts: 3,030 Member
    jams67 said:

    Post Tramatic Stress
    PTS is what most of us have. Most of us have been through or are going through hell. On the other side you are left with a shell of a person who has to be put back together emotionally and physically. No wonder at times our emotions are a little shaky. Once when saying the Lord's Prayer, it dawned on me "Thy will be done" and then I quit worrying about the "what ifs" of life. We never know, let God worry about it. We could die being run over by a truck. Just enjoy your life and always "look forward...
    Jo Ann

    NED is good
    I am glad I am NED, it gives me the opportunity... a second chance to try and eat healthier and be active...to try to keep the cancer at bay, without going through chemo or radiation. I know I may not be NED forever, but it's good being here!
  • This comment has been removed by the Moderator
  • tesslee
    tesslee Member Posts: 97
    unknown said:

    This comment has been removed by the Moderator

    if i was hit by a truck
    at least i went quickly. this cancer thing is new for me. it's messed with my future plans and i don't like that. i try to live day by day but even that's hard when i have extreme fatigue an have to lie in bed. than i plan what i'm gonna do with my renovation house and what i'm physically going to do tomorrow, such as the laundry, sweep the floor, etc. the next morning comes and i'm weak and tired. then i forgive myself and say well maybe after chemo i can get some serious work done. then i think about what if i die soon, i need to get my affairs in order.

    i keep reading about remission followed by another bout of cancer and chemo and i really don't know if i want that life. life for me is about quality and not quantity. God there's so much to think about when your life has changed with a dx of cancer. stage 4 and i look sick. i saw my primary care doc for the first time last week, i love him dearly, and he politely told me he wanted to do an iron test as i looked bad (but he put it a nice way). i said no i just have one a few days ago. it worries me that i look sick, i feel beat down, that's when i have to think of estate planning. can it be beat, yes i think so, my Mom beat it. but it was caught early. is that the difference, yes i think so, but there are always exceptions. hopefully all of us are exceptions.

    i spent the last three weeks in bed mostly. the home care nurses made a mistake with the 5fu dosing. instead of three days (46 hrs) i ended having the pump on five days. it really did a number on my energy. it's amazing how my attitude is directly related to how i am feeling, hmmm, don't think that's anything new. but another chemo round today and if they (home health care) got it wrong this time, i'm going for blood.
  • John23
    John23 Member Posts: 2,122 Member
    tesslee said:

    if i was hit by a truck
    at least i went quickly. this cancer thing is new for me. it's messed with my future plans and i don't like that. i try to live day by day but even that's hard when i have extreme fatigue an have to lie in bed. than i plan what i'm gonna do with my renovation house and what i'm physically going to do tomorrow, such as the laundry, sweep the floor, etc. the next morning comes and i'm weak and tired. then i forgive myself and say well maybe after chemo i can get some serious work done. then i think about what if i die soon, i need to get my affairs in order.

    i keep reading about remission followed by another bout of cancer and chemo and i really don't know if i want that life. life for me is about quality and not quantity. God there's so much to think about when your life has changed with a dx of cancer. stage 4 and i look sick. i saw my primary care doc for the first time last week, i love him dearly, and he politely told me he wanted to do an iron test as i looked bad (but he put it a nice way). i said no i just have one a few days ago. it worries me that i look sick, i feel beat down, that's when i have to think of estate planning. can it be beat, yes i think so, my Mom beat it. but it was caught early. is that the difference, yes i think so, but there are always exceptions. hopefully all of us are exceptions.

    i spent the last three weeks in bed mostly. the home care nurses made a mistake with the 5fu dosing. instead of three days (46 hrs) i ended having the pump on five days. it really did a number on my energy. it's amazing how my attitude is directly related to how i am feeling, hmmm, don't think that's anything new. but another chemo round today and if they (home health care) got it wrong this time, i'm going for blood.

    Home care?


    Re:
    "i spent the last three weeks in bed mostly. the home care nurses
    made a mistake with the 5fu dosing. instead of three days (46
    hrs) i ended having the pump on five days. it really did a number
    on my energy. it's amazing how my attitude is directly related to
    how i am feeling, hmmm, don't think that's anything new. but
    another chemo round today and if they (home health care) got it
    wrong this time, i'm going for blood. "


    My mind is going 90 mph, but I'm speechless.

    I trust you notified your oncologist? If not, do so. And notify
    the management of that home care provider. If you don't have
    an attorney, you might want to consider talking to one, and
    providing data if and when the time comes that you may desire
    to have an attorney on your side.

    Chemotherapy isn't something to fool with.


    Take care.


    John
  • coloCan
    coloCan Member Posts: 1,944 Member
    John23 said:

    Home care?


    Re:
    "i spent the last three weeks in bed mostly. the home care nurses
    made a mistake with the 5fu dosing. instead of three days (46
    hrs) i ended having the pump on five days. it really did a number
    on my energy. it's amazing how my attitude is directly related to
    how i am feeling, hmmm, don't think that's anything new. but
    another chemo round today and if they (home health care) got it
    wrong this time, i'm going for blood. "


    My mind is going 90 mph, but I'm speechless.

    I trust you notified your oncologist? If not, do so. And notify
    the management of that home care provider. If you don't have
    an attorney, you might want to consider talking to one, and
    providing data if and when the time comes that you may desire
    to have an attorney on your side.

    Chemotherapy isn't something to fool with.


    Take care.


    John

    In a sense, you're beating it every second you're still alive--
    with the caveat that the positives in your life exceed the negatives.....steve