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Scans on Monday

thready's picture
thready
Posts: 475
Joined: Sep 2009

Well, I was wondering why am I walking around aimlessly today. Why do I keep looking out the window? I feel like Wacko Woman today. It dawned on me. Scans on Monday!!! These are the first scans I have had since treatment started. I finished treatment 4/14/10 and so this is making me crazy. I have tried to keep busy but really can't concentrate. The words of my onc at our last visit keep bouncing between my ears. "At my stage there is often a recurrence in the liver". I ask myself why did she say that? I don't have an answer I did not ask her, it seamed like such a random statement.

O.k. I am telling myself we can do this, most of you all have done it, you made it, I can to! I guess I need to put on my super Wacko Woman Cape and try to find some sort of super human powers to get me through this right?

I don't think I was this nutty before I had surgery. If today is this tough, then what is the weekend going to be like?
Now where is that Super Wacko Woman Cape-arrgh I can't find anything today!

Jan

Jaylo969
Posts: 827
Joined: Jan 2010

I know if it were me I'd be crazy as a bitsy-bug. I'd probably have to seriously be thinking about some Ativan for a few days.

Here's to a clear, clean scan for you on Monday. Try not to worry ( but I know that is like asking you to try not to breathe). My thoughts will be with you on Monday.

-Pat

dmdwins
Posts: 453
Joined: Aug 2008

As you know from my prior post it has been a rough week for me too. I know exactly what you mean. I have had brain dysfunction all week.... losing things, crying for NO reason,driving past exits on the highway....Etc.

I will be thinking of you Jan and praying that you here those magical words of NED. You fought the battle...now its time to reap the reward of good news.

Smiles,
Dawn

AllieC
Posts: 17
Joined: Aug 2009

Will be thinking of you and praying for clean, gorgeous scans!

AllieC
Posts: 17
Joined: Aug 2009

Will be thinking of you and praying for clean, gorgeous scans!

Sundanceh's picture
Sundanceh
Posts: 4408
Joined: Jun 2009

"what is the weekend going to be like?"

I think it's going to between 76-80 degrees all weekend, LOL:)

Anxiously awaiting right along with you for the results...until then, enjoy the weather before it gets too hot. Good thoughts coming your way, Jan.

-Craig:)

karguy's picture
karguy
Posts: 1024
Joined: Apr 2009

Good luck on your scans on monday,try and be calm,enjoy mothers day.It is very hard not to worry,but I kept telling myself what ever is, will be,and I tried to stay positive,that no matter what, I would beat it.Have a good mothers day.I will pray the scans are good.

MoSoLe09's picture
MoSoLe09
Posts: 14
Joined: Sep 2009

Just want to say good luck and I'll be thinking of you. I also have my first scans on Monday since finishing 6 months of Folfox Tx Feb 26. I see the docs on Wed to go over the results. I am hoping and expecting all clear. Was IIb T4 N0 M0 but can't keep other thoughts from coming. I have been really busy at work so that has kept my mind mostly busy but I know this weekend will be hard. I wish I had talked my pcp out of stopping the Ativan. I think it would have been very useful the next few days. Anyway I can't believe your onc said that to you but try to ignore it as that was a pretty sad way to explain your treatment plan. Whacko Woman plays Wack'a Onc maybe ;-)
Take it easy...Frank

thready's picture
thready
Posts: 475
Joined: Sep 2009

Wow that sounds like a fun game. Made me laugh. We will all get through this! It is just the waiting that is tough.

I am hopeful that we all get good news next week!
Take care
Jan

dianetavegia's picture
dianetavegia
Posts: 1953
Joined: Mar 2009

I saw you mention this earlier and wondered if you misunderstood one or two words. Since your chance of remaining cancer FREE is around 80%, maybe the onc actually said 'most often the recurrence is in the liver'(instead of the big toe).... like 'with rectal cancer, the cancer most often reoccur in the lungs'. Your chance of a recurrence is 2 out of 10, 20 out of 100! Or, as I like to think of it, 8 out of 10 that you remain cancer FREE. 80 out of 100 that you will never have to deal with this again.

Remember my sister, your doctor is The Great Physician!

I'm praying for you and for only wonderful reports!

taraHK
Posts: 1961
Joined: Aug 2003

"feed the faith, fight the fear" -- a wonderful mantra I learned on this board.....That's what I'm repeating to myself right now!
Tara

lisa42's picture
lisa42
Posts: 3661
Joined: Jul 2008

Hi Jan,

Thinking of and praying for you to remain calm while you wait for getting the scan done and then for the results. I'm getting scanned tomorrow, myself.
I think what Diane said is probably what your doctor meant, hopefully.
Try to keep as positive and as busy as possible before the scan- it will help keep your mind off of it.

Best wishes to you,
Lisa

thready's picture
thready
Posts: 475
Joined: Sep 2009

O.k. good things come in small packages. I got a call today from my daughter-in-law and she wanted to know if I wanted to have lunch with her. Well of course I did!! She is an awesome person and when I see her I get to also see my grandson. This is just what this Wacko Woman needed.

I have made plans for this evening and for tomorrow, so that just leaves Saturday and Sunday. My husband will be home those days so I can talk to him for two days, I sure hope his ears don't fall off.

I think I have decided to not dwell on what the Dr said. Doctors say some off the wall things sometimes and I know that so I am going to just hang in there until I hear her say everything is o.k. I have always been the glass half full sort of person and now is not a good time to change that.

There are so many of us having scans this week and next week I am hoping all is well for everyone.

Best wishes to everyone!!
Jan

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