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Just found out Wed

Posts: 3
Joined: Jul 2009

Was just told Wed. that I have prostate cancer. Not really feeling anything at this moment. My wife asks on daily basis how I am doing and I tell her fine. My dr want to see me on the 30th, to sort of decied what way to go, either radiation or surgery. I've decided on surgery. Not sure on the date yet, that will be decided. A little concerned about time away from work, hope it is not alot. I guess really my head is in a cloud a little, dont want to worry my wife, due to the fact we have been dealing with her lymphoma for the last 3 years, and she does not need any more stress. I'm sorry for babbling, but it seems good to say some of these things.

lshick's picture
Posts: 62
Joined: Apr 2009

Welcome the group that nobody wants to be in.

At this point, and not knowing your numbers, I would advise you that you almost certainly have lots of time (months) to do your homework and decide what course of action (including maybe doing nothing) is right for you. Get second and third and fourth opinions. Be a jerk about asking "what makes you think so?" and "show me the published evidence."

The various mainstream treatment modes have very similar long-term survival rates. So you're picking first based upon the Really Best practitioner you have access to (never mind which technology). Ask "what's the 10-year survival rate of your patients?" and "what's your rate of incontinence/ED?"

Make sure you really understand the side-effects of each treatment mode--not just the rosy scenario that is put forth by the proponents and practitioners of that mode.

So take a deep breath and slow down. You have time to make this decision with all the facts. And welcome to the club.


Posts: 25
Joined: Jul 2009

I am in a similiar situation. Finding out about 1 1/2 months ago. Right now I am leaning towards surgery. The Radiation Oncologist said that the most effective radiation treatment generally requires hormone treatment afterwards. I'm 54 years old and really don't want chemical castration. With the hormone treatment the goal is to stop the production of testosterone.

Posts: 12
Joined: Jun 2009

I was diagnosed at age 64 - clinical stage T1c, normal DRE, 4.92 PSA, Gleason score 6 in 2 of 10 biopsy sites. After consulting with prostate cancer specialists at M.D. Anderson Cancer Center in Houston, I chose brachytherapy rather than surgery to avoid side effects as much as possible. The radiation oncology specialists didn't feel that general radiation or hormone treatment in addition to seed implants was necessary.

I underwent brachytherapy treatment at M.D. Anderson in May 2008. I have experienced no incontinence, but continue to have some urgency and burning that is expected to dissipate over time. My sexual function has declined somewhat, but Cialis has proven to be effective medication. In conjunction with the ACS, I'm starting a prostate cancer support group in York County SC. If you like, I would be happy to speak with you in more detail. My office telephone number is (803)802-8001.

rogermoore's picture
Posts: 265
Joined: Mar 2002


We are glad you found this site and hope you find the answers to some of your questions here. As was already indicated, take a deep breath and begin your research. Having gone through your wife's diagnosis and treatment (?) I'm sure you are not unfamiliar with the research mode.

Once your diagnosis has been confirmed, perhaps the biggest decision you will have to make is the selection of your treatment doctor. You should be COMPLETELY comfortable with your decision because his/her abilities will have a big impact on the rest of your life. I even went out of state to find a surgeon I was comfortable with and had complete confidence in.

Posting of your age, family history, scores (if you have them from your doctor), geographical location, job, hobbies will all be helpful in readers on this site being of help to you.

Please keep us posted on your situation as changes happen. You may e-mail any of us responding to your posting directly from this site. This is sometimes used in case of more personal questions.

Again, Good Luck and give your wife our love and support.


WHW's picture
Posts: 189
Joined: Jul 2009


I just read your post and wanted you to know that there are those of us who know where you're coming from. Maybe I can appreciate your situation a little more than others.

I just received my diagnosis last week as well. I really can appreciate your situation as regards your wife. My wife was diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma in November of 2005 and had all the chemo and other stuff. She underwent a stem cell transplant in July of 06. She has dealt with quite a bit over the last 4 years. She was 49 when diagnosed. While she has never been able to completely return to her life of high energy, our 26 year marriage is better than ever and we consider our lives totally blessed.

At present she has been on a ventilator in the ICU unit of the local hospital for the past three weeks. Her prognosis is good and I expect her home in 3-4 weeks.

I received my diagnosis while she was in the hospital and as yet haven't been able to discuss it with her. I don't plan to until she has gone through the recovery rehab and is home with me. She certainly doesn't need to be worrying about this right now.

I know that PC is serious but I just can't help but feel that it is just a bump in the road for us. I told my doctor that given what my wife has been through, my situation is a walk in the park. I am not trivializing PC in any way. But as her caregiver I will choose the treatment path that allows me the quickest and best recovery that allows me the energy to provide the care my wife needs.

I cannot say that I am not concerned about the quality of life issues after treatment and I am not minimizing the impact of ED and incontinence, but in the grand scale of things it seems to me that the approach I have to take is just "It Is What It Is.

I just wanted you to know that you are not alone in your situation. If you would like to talk further one on one please feel free to let me know. Just post a reply and and let me know. I will post my email address.

I am 60 years old and live in the Orlando, Fl area.

Good luck, God Bless, and I hope this helps a little as you go down the path.


Posts: 3
Joined: Jul 2009

Im very sorry to hear about your wife, and will be adding her to my prayers. Yes I believe we do have alot in common, wish it was under different situation. Im 55 years old and live in north branch michigan. I still work for the state of michigan, ( this is 37 years). Im not ready to retire yet, as my wife still has 2 years to work.
I have decided after consideration that I am going to have the surgery. I feel that in my situation it is the best course of action. My wife and I have talk, and I think this will also help her. I feel that they found it early, so why take any more chances. Im in stage A, with a gleason score of 6.
My Dr. is a person who cares and is highly recommended. He took the time with me and my wife for about an hour when he had to inform me, which I respected very much. I have to meet with him again on the 30th, and tentivily scheluded surgery for the 18th of augest.
Again thank you all for the comments, and support, hope we can all keep on talking, it sure does help.

lewvino's picture
Posts: 1010
Joined: May 2009

Good look to you on your surgery. I live in Tennessee and am scheduled for my Davinci surgery on August 12th. Had 5 samples come back as Gleason 7's.


Posts: 3
Joined: Jul 2009

Hello Fluteman,

As you may have ascertained by now, there's a lot of choices when dealing with prostate cancer as there are so many variables concerning the disease. Please allow me to pass on a tip from my doctor. Consider the purchase of "Prostate and Cancer" by Dr. Sheldon Marks. He may even have and updated book out by now but the info in there is very helpful and it's a good read for those of us looking for answers. Whatever info you come across, it will cause you to have questions. Please write these questions down and bring them to your doctor when you visit. Be as organized as you possibly can. I say this cause many of us live lives that don't require much organization and we are too layed back. This isn't a time for that. Get you act together and read read read then write your questions, then look for the answers from the professionals. Come here and ask these fine folks what their experiences were. Trust me, you'll have plenty of time to make the correct decision for yourself and your family. Have faith and be of good cheer.

Kind regards

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