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Relationship changes with my daughter.

Posts: 1
Joined: Nov 2005

My daughter is 31 years old. She was diagnosed with breast cancer at 27. It has now spread to her bones. Over the last several months, she has begun to shut me out of her life. She does not want me to visit or go to treatments with her. Does not talk about what's going with her and has no interest in what's going on with me. She has to have assistance, but calls on friends and other family members other than me. We were very close before. Has anyone experienced this? It would help so much if I knew this was a normal process for someone with cancer. She is single.

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My situation with my daughter is somewhat different, but let's compare notes...
I lost my right breast when she was 12. Lost my left when she was 14.
We still have a good relationship (almost 20 years later - she's 31 now), but we NEVER mention the C word. She just won't go there.
So I relate to her in every other way I can. We talk clothes, recipes, movies, and whatever she wants to talk about...
I hope she shares her thoughts about cancer with someone else she is close to, but that's her decision and I have to respect it. And I know it isn't anything personal toward me. It's just how she is. And she's the greatest! I know you feel the same about your daughter. Just let her call the shots for now. Maybe she'll open up to you one day....or not...but you are her mother so you are the one who can love her unconditionally.

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