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Colorectal cancer stage 4 with mets

BladderCa4
Posts: 1
Joined: Oct 2019

Hello everyone.  I am new to these Boards.  I am living with Bladder Ca stage 4.  But that is not the reason I am sharing and looking for input.  I am sharing because my best friend/neighbor just passed from colorectal cancer.  She fought a good fight for approximately 5 years.

She was being treated at the Mayo Clinic in Florida.  On or about the 5th of August she was declared cancer "free" in remission.  They (the Mayo) told her to ring their bell to let everyone know.  She was ecstatic as were we all.  

Well, approximately three weeks later she was admitted urgently.  She could not eat or keep anything down.  She had two operations, one of them was massive lasting about 9 hours (all at the Mayo Clinic).  The result was she had cancer all over her internal organs.  

My question - How could the Mayo Clinic have missed this during their testing to declare her cancer in remission and her cancer free?  As a registered nurse, this makes no sense to me.  As a felllow cancer patient and having studies my cancer it makes no sense to me.

There are supposed to be tests - blood, scans, etc. to identify cancer.  I, myself, go next week for my yearly scan of my significant body parts where my cancer can mets to.  

This was the Mayo Clinic - the so-called prestigious and wonderful Mayo Clinic.  Help me understand if you can as I am hurting so much.  Thank you.

 

Trubrit's picture
Trubrit
Posts: 4849
Joined: Jan 2013

You know, I can't answer your question, as much as I would like to help you at this sad time. 

Cancer does have a mind of its own, and yes, the spread of Cancer really should have been detected, as I am sure your friend was having all the right tests at the right time. 

Did someone drop the ball? Chances are yes, it certainly looks like things were missed, but will you ever know for sure? I would say, no. 

You are mourning your friend, and it is absolutely normal to have many quesitons running through your head. Thing is, there will come a time where you either let those thoughts run amock or you reign them in. Those thoughts will always be there - unless you get a positive answer frm Mayo and thats not likely to happen - but you will learn to put them in their place. 

Right now, you are in deep mourning for your friend, and all that she has lost, you have lost, her loved ones have lost.  Mourn until you can mourn no more, then live you life with joy, because your friend would want you to. 

I wish you the best as you go in for your own tests. 

As for me, personally, even though I am 5 years NED (no evidence of disease), I cannot bring myself to say I am Cancer free - ever. I just say I am surviving Cancer. Will it soften the blow, if one day I am no longer NED? I doubt it, but it works in my head. 

May you find peace in the near future, as you move forward, mourning your friend, and remembering the good times. 

Tru

nuc
Posts: 44
Joined: Jun 2019

I am very very sorry for your loss. 

I agree with Tru, very likely someone, or more likely several people, dropped the ball.

I hope for you to find peace and move forward.......

Adam

 

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