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Hi, I'm new here. PLEASE HELP ME!!!
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Dec 09, 2017 - 1:28 pm
My mom has been in the hospital since late July. She had uterine cancer which was taken out in early August. She was in ICU for 4 1/2 weeks. Now, she's been back and forth beteween The Hospital and Rehab. Now, to make a long story short, my mom isn't in good shape. They said she's probably going to die. Here's my problem/questions. She has blood clot in her legs and lungs and her kidneys are failing and the cancer is back and spreading. Do you think there is ANY CHANCE my mother can survive? I did hear maybe going for chemotherapy but I have a feeling if she does that it will kill her. But can it work? Is there a flicker or gliimmer of hope that she can at least pull through? Or should I just accept The Doctors prognosis and accept she's going to die?
Please help. |
Joined: Jun 2015
Jack, So sorry to hear about
Jack, So sorry to hear about your Mom. Your questions are not easy to answer. We are not doctors and our comments on this board are based mostly on our own experiences. Your Mom sounds like she is in really bad health and that she may not be strong enough to go through the chemo. I can tell you, it isn't easy on our bodies. I hope you have a good rapport with her doctors and can ask them to help guide you. There is always hope. And, I believe her doctors will provide you the best options for her.
Your Mom is lucky to have you by her side. I'm sure she feels better just knowing you are there to support her.
Take care and please come back with questions or let us know how she is doing.
Love and Hugs,
Cindi
Joined: Dec 2017
Thank You Cindi for answering
Thank You Cindi for answering and I'm glad your ok.
Joined: Mar 2013
Dear Jack, I am so sorry to
Dear Jack, I am so sorry to hear about your mom. She really has a lot going on and that is never easy. I think Cindi hit it all on the head and I agree she is so lucky to have such a loving and caring son.
It is hard to watch the ones we love suffer but I am sure she loves having you with her.
Joined: Dec 2017
Thank you. We are going to
Thank you. We are going to see The Doctors on Monday to see our available options. I hope she is strong enough for chemo or even dialysis.
Joined: Oct 2009
Your Mom
Jack, You are a brave and strong son. Your Mom and her doctors, nurses and other medical professionals are doing everything they can to help your Mom out of this crisis. Treatments and protocols for cancer have a lot is standardization to it and sometimes there are variations to the treatments based on the individual‘s co-existing conditions that make treatment difficult. This is likely the case for your Mom. Many of us on this discussion board will keep your Mom and you in our prayers. Hope is something you share with your Mom. Please take care of yourself so you can be there for your Mom. I am glad you found this discussion board. Please check in again to let us know how you and your Mom are doing.
Joined: Dec 2017
That's very nice of you even
That's very nice of you even though I just joined the board today. I thank you for keeping my mom in your prayers.
Joined: Jun 2017
So sorry for what you and
So sorry for what you and your mom are going through. Prayers for you both.
Joined: Dec 2017
to please help me
Hi Jack, I'm sorry for what you and your mom are going through. And I understand it as that is the battle I am waging. I have recurrent uterine cancer and have been on chemotherapy since April. My doctor calls it "recurrent." The paliative care team calls it "terminal." So, I hope and pray for the best outcome, a total healing, and enjoy friends and family. In the meantime I try to consider and do the things that will make it easier for my family if I die in the next few months. But basically we are all in denial and cannot consider that while I look fine, I could be dying. It's such a paradox. If your mother can still make decisions for herself, ask her how to handle things. What is important to her now, if these are her final days/months/year? Be positive. Miracles happen.
Joined: Dec 2017
My mom passed away this past
My mom passed away this past Sunday. I'm sorry I didn't get back to you as it's been crazy. Ironically, at 2:20pm in room 220. She was at Hospice for 4 days before she died. It was pretty sad to your mom not know where she is and can't even talk. I'm not even that sad as I've been preparing for this for about 10 days. She didn't suffer which was a good thing as she's suffered enough. She was at peace.
Avidreader, I felt the same way. On December 7, I found out she was going to die and ever since then I've been in a fog. Also, Avidreader, I send you tons of strength and prayers and positive thoughts your way.
Joined: Oct 2017
So sorry
So very very sorry for your loss...very hard to lose your mom and most especially at this time of year...
Glad she didn't suffer at the end and is now at peace and without pain...
prayers for you and your family
Joined: Mar 2013
Jack, I am so sorry to hear
Jack, I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your mom.
Joined: Dec 2017
Thank You.
Thank You.
Joined: Feb 2016
So sorry
So sorry for the loss of your mother, especially this time of year. May God wrap his arms around you.
Joined: Jun 2012
Jack,
Thank you for letting us know. I've been wondering about you both. Take care.
Joined: Dec 2017
I am so, so sorry to read of
I am so, so sorry to read of your loss.
Joined: Jun 2015
Jack, I'm so sorry for the
Jack, I'm so sorry for the loss of your Mom. I hope you can find peace and comfort knowing that you brought her strength and love when she needed it. She is pain free now. May she rest in peace. Thank you for coming back and letting us know.
Love and Hugs,
Cindi
Joined: Jan 2016
Prayers to you Jack. I’m so
Prayers to you Jack. I’m so sorry about your mom’s passing.
Joined: Jun 2017
So sorry
Jack, so sorry you lost your mom. Prayers for you and family.
Joined: Dec 2017
Thank You Everyone. The thing
Thank You Everyone. The thing is that I'm not even sad because I have NO REGRETS. We were there for her for 5 months in The Hospital. Plus, not to mention, the 5 Years I helped take care of her. I was stretched everyway possible. I feel good because like I said I have NO REGRETS. If I did, I'd be more upset but I'm glad I did it. I just can't wait for The Holidays to end.
Joined: Oct 2009
Loss of your Mom
Jack, I am very sorry to hear of your Mom’s passing. I am glad to hear that you are at peace with all that you have done for your beloved Mom. I remember when my Mom lost her battle with uterine cancer my Dad and I used to have to remind ourselves not to play the “I wish I would have -could have-should have...”. We all do the best we can as caregivers and so much is out of our hands. You have been through so much caring for and helping your Mom. Please take care of yourself and just know that it takes time to go through grieving and be kind and patient with yourself. You are a good son ....your Mom lives on in your heart ....❤️ and the hearts of many others .
Joined: Oct 2017
I understand about wanting the holidays to end,
my Dad died of prostate cancer on Chrstmas Eve 2005....,
Joined: Dec 2017
Oh, man, that's terrible.
Oh, man, that's terrible.
Joined: Mar 2013
Jack, I understand your NO
Jack, I understand your NO REGRETS. That is wonderful.
Joined: Dec 2017
Let see. I have no job
Let see. I have no job(applied for a few, but nothing now), I have no Girlfriend, I have no money, I might lose my house, I lost my mom, I have no skills, no experience, LImited education, No Driver's License(as I never had the money to get the lessons), I spent Christmas Eve and Christmas Day by myself as I thought I had plans with my father but I called him and he never called me back(I would've gone with my Uncle but it was too late to call him and go back and forth) and I'm alone for NYE. I don't to do anything tonight anyway.
Happy New Year Everybody!!!
Joined: Mar 2013
Jack, a few years back when I
Jack, a few years back when I was in recruiting I recommended that we hire a woman because she had left her job to take care of her sister who had breast cancer. When that woman retired a few years ago she announced to everyone that I hired her. I told her I wanted a person who would help her family and that is the type of company I thought we were. Being there has a value that can't be measured in dollars.
I do hope 2018 can bring you some good things.
Joined: Dec 2017
I hope so too. Just it's very
I hope so too. Just it's very upsetting.
Joined: Dec 2017
I've applied to about 10 jobs
I've applied to about 10 jobs. CVS, Big Y, Boston Market, Bookkeeper, but have heard nothing yet. I don't think I'm qualified.
Joined: Oct 2009
Jobs after caregiving
You might want to go to a nearby state unemployment center and get some free help with resume, job search, interview skills , networking and/ or skills development. Just google search your state and workforce center and the website will pop up.
Joined: Dec 2017
This is a problem with many people
My son has had to look at several retail jobs before getting one. It's not helping that January is an off month for retail. Many companies are in inventory mode right now and not actively hiring until that's done.
Do realize that most retail jobs are part-time, and you might not get benefits until you get into a full-time position. The latter is not impossible ... my son just got into one and BOY are the benefits so much better than when he had to go through ACA (even though he made such a low salary, he was not eligible for any subsidies, and most of his pitiful paycheck went just to pay the medical coverage).
If it's some sort of government job, a lot of budgets aren't in place yet. Unlike the old days, companies often won't hire until the budgets are approved and everything is sorted out.
Hopefully, you can find something soon.
Joined: Dec 2017
So, listen to this. I'm going
So, listen to this. I'm going to give you an update on what's been going on. Please click on my blog because I go into great detail about it.
http://superbhowlgreatness.blogspot.com/2018/02/the-name-of-this-blog-says-it-all.html
Joined: Mar 2013
Jack, I read your blog and
Jack, I read your blog and see that you have had it for quite a few years. I think it good to vent and get it out. I will be praying for you.
Joined: Dec 2017
Thank you for reading my blog
Thank you for reading my blog. It's just so damn frustrating.
Joined: Jun 2012
I read, too.
I hope you can begin to turn things around for yourself. Keep your chin up.
Joined: Dec 2017
Thank You Connie
Thank You Connie
Joined: Dec 2017
Now, my mom was on Medicaid.
Now, my mom was on Medicaid. I wasn't on Medicaid but is there anyway I can contact Medicaid and would they pay me because I was a caregiver for her?
Joined: Jan 2018
Caring.com
Jack I read your blog and I am truly sorry about your mom. She was lucky having such a devoted son. Being a caregiver is not an easy job. My parents were in need of a little help while I am going through my own cancer scare and can’t help as much as I was before. I found a lady who my parents love from care.com. It might be worthwhile to look into this website. My niece also did ad hoc pet sitting using rover,com (don’t know how you feel about pets). She loves animals.
Good Luck to you and I pray you are able to find fulfillment!
Joined: Dec 2017
What is care.com? Btw, I hope
What is care.com? Btw, I hope you and your family are doing better.
Joined: Jan 2018
https://www.care.com/
Care.com is where you can post your resume and little bit about yourself what your qualifications and strengths are. People looking for care givers can go there and find someone that fits their specific needs. Check it out - it may be something that may be useful for you.