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Never Mind SUGERY just CANCELLED via voicemail UPDATE surgery back on

herdizziness
herdizziness Member Posts: 3,624
edited September 2013 in Colorectal Cancer #1

Discovered a voicemail left on my phone (it had died and was plugged in) left by Dr. lee canceling my surgery in view of latest CT scan, so sorry, knew you had been trying to get it.

Oh REALLY, so I can just live with this stomach pain and bleeding out my arse for how long?  Until I die?

Son of a B, I am pissed and sobbing.  

Winter Marie

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Comments

  • tufi000
    tufi000 Member Posts: 745
    nononononono

    we will wait together   It's soooo difficult I know

  • Chelsea71
    Chelsea71 Member Posts: 1,169
    Oh Winter Marie, I am soooo

    Oh Winter Marie, I am soooo sorry to read this news.  I can't believe he left this info on voicemail.  How tacky!  My god I hate this effing disease.  I am pissed right along with you.  

     

    Chelsea

  • Trubrit
    Trubrit Member Posts: 5,530 **
    No words

    I can imagine how you are feeling.

    How unprofessional of them not to try to continue to contact you and just leave you a message.

    My thoughts are with you. 

  • LivinginNH
    LivinginNH Member Posts: 1,456
     
    OH MY GOD!!  I just got

     

    OH MY GOD!!  I just got chills all over my body when I read this - - and I'm pissed right along with you!!!  Damn doctor, he left this on your VOICEMAIL!  That SOB!  My dear, I don't know what to say, this is simply horrible.  Is there another doctor that you can go to tomorrow??  They have to do something for you!

    :'(

  • Annabelle41415
    Annabelle41415 Member Posts: 6,712 **
    Terrible

    This is terrible that a doctor would leave this on a voice message.  Sorry you can't get the surgery at this time, but I'd be seeking a second opinion from a more heart caring doctor.  Sorry for your news.  I'm hoping that you can find out some answers very soon.  I'm worried about your situation.  Please get another doctor soon.

    Kim

  • Lovekitties
    Lovekitties Member Posts: 3,364
    Dear Winter Marie

    I can't beleive that you just get a vm saying...surgery canceled.  Wow...need a new surgeon for sure.

    I know this is a rut in the road but someone needs to be beating the bushes on your behalf to get to a surgeon pronto.

    I know that with your current pain and agony it is hard for you to get more done, and hope that someone can help you get new appointments.

    If all else fails, go to the ER and insist on what you feel you need.

    Hugs and love and prayers coming your way,

    Marie who loves kitties

  • geotina
    geotina Member Posts: 2,111
    Marie:

    This just truly sucks.  Now get mad, bang the walls, scream and yell  (I am mumbling some not so very nice words for you here in Michigan).  So he cancelled Tuesday's surgery but did he say anything about what the plan will be?  Does he want chemo first to shrink?  Does he want to see you to discuss options?  If you need the surgery you need the surgery.   If you just show up at the ER ( I know, no one wants to do, I fought George on this a few times) then do just that.  Many doctors and surgeons can be just so matter of fact but a voicemail, unacceptable and so insensitive it boils my blood.  He could have said, call me instead of leaving a lousy message......

    Love and Hugs - Tina

  • herdizziness
    herdizziness Member Posts: 3,624
    I admit

    I was busy being devastated at first, now I'm just plain angry.  I will find a way to get this surgery, trust me.  

    Thank you all for understanding the way this call made me feel, I almost threw my iPhone in frustration as the message was playing, but I stopped myself, got to have control over something even if it's just a hissy fit.

    And Tina, that was just the surgeon he said to call my onc and get a "new plan" in place ie., chemo, yeah right.

    Winter Marie

  • steveandnat
    steveandnat Member Posts: 886
    That stinks

    These doctors need to realizeouter world  surrounds everything they say and do. Any changes, especially something like a surgery, shouldn't be done through voicemail. Pray everything works out!  Jeff

  • Sundanceh
    Sundanceh Member Posts: 4,392

    I admit

    I was busy being devastated at first, now I'm just plain angry.  I will find a way to get this surgery, trust me.  

    Thank you all for understanding the way this call made me feel, I almost threw my iPhone in frustration as the message was playing, but I stopped myself, got to have control over something even if it's just a hissy fit.

    And Tina, that was just the surgeon he said to call my onc and get a "new plan" in place ie., chemo, yeah right.

    Winter Marie

    In the Same Boat...

    Row row, row your boat gently down the stream....merrily, merrily, merrilym merrily, life is but a !@#$$%

    Sounds like your listening to the same record as me, Winter.....

    I jumped through hoops and it was chemo the whole time....

    Sure, you feel betrayed....sure you feel cheated...

    The only thing I take from it...is that surgery is what we both desire...but perhaps our locations (at this time) are really not operable...and to possibly go against the grain and force the issue, mnight not lean in our favor....perhaps. 

    I've resolved myself to do a few months and then scan and see where our blood and scans look....if we see response, then I'm going to push again....though he knows what I want.

    But, my doctors (for whatever reason) are hesitant to take a chance on me until I do this, it seems.

    As for the voicemail, well, the gang already said it best.  It's understandable to be so disappointed after gearing up....

    As before, maybe the time for surgery is upcoming.....I remember Jenny used to want to barrel head into anything and everything....and i had to talk her down so many times....to just step back and re-evaluate....and then see how your perspective is then.  Didn't work, of course...Jenny did what she wanted to do, LOL:) 

    Know you will too....just be prudent my friend:)

    -c

  • wolfen
    wolfen Member Posts: 1,324

    That stinks

    These doctors need to realizeouter world  surrounds everything they say and do. Any changes, especially something like a surgery, shouldn't be done through voicemail. Pray everything works out!  Jeff

    Winter

    Even with all the krappy care that Ron received, no one ever stooped so low as to leave a vm. Score another one for the caring medical profession. I'm so sorry you were treated this way.

    Tomorrow is a new day. You go get um' girl!

    Luv,

    Wolfen

  • wawaju04976
    wawaju04976 Member Posts: 316
    So sorry, Winter. It's just

    So sorry, Winter. It's just not fair!

    Judy

  • mukamom
    mukamom Member Posts: 402

    So sorry, Winter. It's just

    So sorry, Winter. It's just not fair!

    Judy

    Been wondering

    how you have been doing...pretty damn crappy of that doc and so so sorry that there is another bump in this seemingly endless road.

    Praying for a quick resolution to your pain.

    (((HUGS)))

    Angela

  • janderson1964
    janderson1964 Member Posts: 2,215
    That totally sucks and what

    That totally sucks and what an insensitive and unprofessional SOB. My now former oncologist had the nerve to send a nurse practitioner to give me my last scan report which was one of many things that pissed me off. Did I mention that he is my former oncologist. Keep fighting. You are as strong as they come. I have faith in YOU.

  • johnnybegood
    johnnybegood Member Posts: 1,117

    That totally sucks and what

    That totally sucks and what an insensitive and unprofessional SOB. My now former oncologist had the nerve to send a nurse practitioner to give me my last scan report which was one of many things that pissed me off. Did I mention that he is my former oncologist. Keep fighting. You are as strong as they come. I have faith in YOU.

    oh winter

    i am so sorry for this set back.i agree with our lion it seems us old timers are in the same boat a lot of the time and we feel it is sinking.my last onc visit was not very promising so i guess we can all try to stay afloat and row together.although it may not be in a stream, we will be rowing in rough waters (((HUGS)))...Godbless...johnnybegood

  • jen2012
    jen2012 Member Posts: 1,607
    Wish i could say I was

    Wish i could say I was surprised....but surgeons aren't known for their wonderful bedside manner.   I guess they are just way too important to play phone tag.

    WM - very sorry you are so upset, but hopefully another doctor, or time, will have a better answer for you.  Keep pushing until you get what you want or at least until you agree with the way the docs think things should be.  

  • Maxiecat
    Maxiecat Member Posts: 544
    WM...my heart breaks for you.

    WM...my heart breaks for you.  I know how bad you wanted that surgery.  Can you get a second opinion from another surgeon?  I am so sorry that you are even having to deal with this.

    alAlexin and that voicemail...not cool.  I would definately call them back and let them know.

     

  • Lorikat
    Lorikat Member Posts: 681
    Wish we could do an old

    Wish we could do an old fashioned "sit in".  A bunch of us together just making a point.....  YOU DO NOT VOICE MAIL CANCER PATIENTS.  Can you imagine? they would never forget it I'm sure!  Ok.  My 1960'S are showing.

    truly am sorry they were so crass.  And truly wish I could do something from here.  ((((HUGS))))

     

  • annalexandria
    annalexandria Member Posts: 2,571
    This is one of those times when I really wish CSN

    allowed us to swear.  Leaving this kind of inoformation on a vm is beyond insensitive.  I know surgeons all seem to suffer from some kind of social personality disorder, but come on!  This is ridiculous.  I know you may not feel up to it, but this really deserves a response, at least an email saying "hey, this sucks, don't do it again".  He should know that this was not well done.

    As for the surgery, I don't understand why they can't do palliative surgery.  I've seen that done many times, just to address pain.  You absolutely should not have to live with a tumor that is causing agony.  That's insane.  Can you keep looking for another surgeon?  I can't imagine that there isn't someone out there who would be willing to do this for you, in light of your symptoms.

    This really pisses me off, WM.  Can't imagine how angry you must be.

    Hugs and some strength coming your way~AA

  • tanstaafl
    tanstaafl Member Posts: 1,299
    steps

    That sucks.  It sounds callous.  However, if you live a far distance away and time was short, maybe it was pragmatic to try to insure that you knew the cancellation before you packed up and left the house, where playing phone tag might miss you.

    Winter, I know you have the ability to leave a "bigger-better" voice mail. It may make you feel better too.  Then time to concentrate on plan B. Perhaps there's still a surgeon with a plan the other 90% don't have the skill and experience to do.

     

  • herdizziness
    herdizziness Member Posts: 3,624
    I know I know Craig

    You and Kathryn gave good advice, BUT, well you know me Craig, determined, like our Jennie.

    it was as I thought the "palliative care" thing, "we cancelled because with the new tumors we cannot operate under the palliative care unless you are completely obstructed." So what am I supposed to do Doc? "Well chemo" but Doc have had this tumor since October and two different regimes of chemo and that didn't shrink it, what makes you think this will? "But" says Doc "there's radiation" Nope, no radiation for me. "You won't do radiation?" NO. so you want me to live with this excruciating pain then Doc? "Um, no, but we can put a stent in" And then what Doc? Wait for the tumor to keep growing sending out it's little cells?  If you won't do it Stanford said they will, guess I'll go to Stanford. "Stanford said they would do it?" Yes.  "Well, if you understand your other tumors will keep growing, we will do it."  Well Doc I've been off chemo since April and the growth has been minimal, I think they aren't going to grow life threatening in 4 weeks until back on chemo.  

    So surgery is back on.

    Winter Marie

  • janderson1964
    janderson1964 Member Posts: 2,215

    I know I know Craig

    You and Kathryn gave good advice, BUT, well you know me Craig, determined, like our Jennie.

    it was as I thought the "palliative care" thing, "we cancelled because with the new tumors we cannot operate under the palliative care unless you are completely obstructed." So what am I supposed to do Doc? "Well chemo" but Doc have had this tumor since October and two different regimes of chemo and that didn't shrink it, what makes you think this will? "But" says Doc "there's radiation" Nope, no radiation for me. "You won't do radiation?" NO. so you want me to live with this excruciating pain then Doc? "Um, no, but we can put a stent in" And then what Doc? Wait for the tumor to keep growing sending out it's little cells?  If you won't do it Stanford said they will, guess I'll go to Stanford. "Stanford said they would do it?" Yes.  "Well, if you understand your other tumors will keep growing, we will do it."  Well Doc I've been off chemo since April and the growth has been minimal, I think they aren't going to grow life threatening in 4 weeks until back on chemo.  

    So surgery is back on.

    Winter Marie

    Good job Marie. Way to stick

    Good job Marie. Way to stick it to them like I know you would. The doctors work for US. WE help pay thier salaryies.

  • jen2012
    jen2012 Member Posts: 1,607

    I know I know Craig

    You and Kathryn gave good advice, BUT, well you know me Craig, determined, like our Jennie.

    it was as I thought the "palliative care" thing, "we cancelled because with the new tumors we cannot operate under the palliative care unless you are completely obstructed." So what am I supposed to do Doc? "Well chemo" but Doc have had this tumor since October and two different regimes of chemo and that didn't shrink it, what makes you think this will? "But" says Doc "there's radiation" Nope, no radiation for me. "You won't do radiation?" NO. so you want me to live with this excruciating pain then Doc? "Um, no, but we can put a stent in" And then what Doc? Wait for the tumor to keep growing sending out it's little cells?  If you won't do it Stanford said they will, guess I'll go to Stanford. "Stanford said they would do it?" Yes.  "Well, if you understand your other tumors will keep growing, we will do it."  Well Doc I've been off chemo since April and the growth has been minimal, I think they aren't going to grow life threatening in 4 weeks until back on chemo.  

    So surgery is back on.

    Winter Marie

    good for you
    But are you sure you want this doc doing the surgery? Sounds like he's doing only to keep the $$ in his hospital.
  • herdizziness
    herdizziness Member Posts: 3,624
    jen2012 said:

    good for you
    But are you sure you want this doc doing the surgery? Sounds like he's doing only to keep the $$ in his hospital.

    LOL Jen

    Actually it was because Dr. Vissar (my liver surgeon) said he would be willing to work on my liver again. Apparently if Dr. Vissar believes that he can still save me via removing my liver tumors again, then there was belief I was more then palliative care only at this point, but had hope of cure. Those are the standards that Dominican works by.  They were the ones that refused to do my surgery back in 2010 and Stanford did the surgery and gave me three extra years. So unless hope of cure Dominican does not allow for surgeries unless in total obstruction.  With Dr. Vissar willing to do liver surgery in future that reopened the doors At Dominican.  And the fact that Stanford would do a colon resection not as pallative cure that cinched the deal. Kind of crazy isn't it?

    Winter Marie

    (by the way while I was on phone with surgeon Stanford was already calling me back, now that's a good office staff and surgeons!!)

  • Happyhar
    Happyhar Member Posts: 49

    LOL Jen

    Actually it was because Dr. Vissar (my liver surgeon) said he would be willing to work on my liver again. Apparently if Dr. Vissar believes that he can still save me via removing my liver tumors again, then there was belief I was more then palliative care only at this point, but had hope of cure. Those are the standards that Dominican works by.  They were the ones that refused to do my surgery back in 2010 and Stanford did the surgery and gave me three extra years. So unless hope of cure Dominican does not allow for surgeries unless in total obstruction.  With Dr. Vissar willing to do liver surgery in future that reopened the doors At Dominican.  And the fact that Stanford would do a colon resection not as pallative cure that cinched the deal. Kind of crazy isn't it?

    Winter Marie

    (by the way while I was on phone with surgeon Stanford was already calling me back, now that's a good office staff and surgeons!!)

    Doing our own Doctoring!

    Isn't it amazing how much of our own Doctoring we have to do? I have been fortunate to have some very good and caring Docs and some who were, well, I"ll just say not ones I'd reccomend for Vet care. Hang in there, stay proactive and Blessings.

     

  • Lovekitties
    Lovekitties Member Posts: 3,364

    I know I know Craig

    You and Kathryn gave good advice, BUT, well you know me Craig, determined, like our Jennie.

    it was as I thought the "palliative care" thing, "we cancelled because with the new tumors we cannot operate under the palliative care unless you are completely obstructed." So what am I supposed to do Doc? "Well chemo" but Doc have had this tumor since October and two different regimes of chemo and that didn't shrink it, what makes you think this will? "But" says Doc "there's radiation" Nope, no radiation for me. "You won't do radiation?" NO. so you want me to live with this excruciating pain then Doc? "Um, no, but we can put a stent in" And then what Doc? Wait for the tumor to keep growing sending out it's little cells?  If you won't do it Stanford said they will, guess I'll go to Stanford. "Stanford said they would do it?" Yes.  "Well, if you understand your other tumors will keep growing, we will do it."  Well Doc I've been off chemo since April and the growth has been minimal, I think they aren't going to grow life threatening in 4 weeks until back on chemo.  

    So surgery is back on.

    Winter Marie

    Way to Go Girl!

    So very glad to hear that the surgery is back on!  and SUPER proud of you for standing your ground and getting it done.

    I knew you could do it!!!

    Hugs and prayers and good vibes for terrific outcome,

    Marie who loves kitties

  • Chelsea71
    Chelsea71 Member Posts: 1,169

    LOL Jen

    Actually it was because Dr. Vissar (my liver surgeon) said he would be willing to work on my liver again. Apparently if Dr. Vissar believes that he can still save me via removing my liver tumors again, then there was belief I was more then palliative care only at this point, but had hope of cure. Those are the standards that Dominican works by.  They were the ones that refused to do my surgery back in 2010 and Stanford did the surgery and gave me three extra years. So unless hope of cure Dominican does not allow for surgeries unless in total obstruction.  With Dr. Vissar willing to do liver surgery in future that reopened the doors At Dominican.  And the fact that Stanford would do a colon resection not as pallative cure that cinched the deal. Kind of crazy isn't it?

    Winter Marie

    (by the way while I was on phone with surgeon Stanford was already calling me back, now that's a good office staff and surgeons!!)

    I knew you'd do it.  I said

    I knew you'd do it.  I said to myself last night, "I totally think she will get herself that surgery".  Fantastic news.  

  • herdizziness
    herdizziness Member Posts: 3,624
    And Thank You

    Each and everyone for your support and caring, you have no idea how this uplifted me to stay strong.  My first words to the surgeon were "what exactly made you change your mind, what particular thing made you decide to not do it?"  When his response was the palliative care only crap I knew it wasn't because of worry tumor other tumors growing while waiting for chemo.  You all gave me the strength to get to the point of why they decided not to do it, and reason through it with him. Making him step back and  look at the big picture.

    Thank you is not enough, but it is all I have.  Thank you.

    Winter Marie

  • Trubrit
    Trubrit Member Posts: 5,530 **
    Tomorrow

    Is the surgery back on for tomorrow or did they have to reschedule?

  • herdizziness
    herdizziness Member Posts: 3,624
    Trubrit said:

    Tomorrow

    Is the surgery back on for tomorrow or did they have to reschedule?

    Yes

    Tomorrow is the surgery date. Been doing the prep today a late start was supposed to start at ten, but didn't get go ahead for surgery until later.

    Winter Marie