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result of scans
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Oct 17, 2012 - 9:21 am
wow 9 am and I just woke up. Stress does rob you of sleep.....yesterday I was awake at 2am...haha. Feeling so blessed, so grateful, and kind of puzzled I think as to this continued NED. brief review for anyone new...diagnosed in 05 stage IIIb colon cancer....resection and chemo. Then in 2006 mets to liver and declared palliative...young surgeon did liver resection....months of xeloda....08 mets back to liver....another resection and xeloda and oxalyplatin...NED since then please I beg you do not think I am showing off.....I hate doing this....but please know at the beginning of your journey.....there is hope love to all mags |
Joined: May 2012
Mags
YAY! So glad to here good news. Don't ever think you are showing off. People like me that was diagnosed April of this year need to here positive news to give us hope. May you stay NED forever. Hugs
Sandy:)
Joined: Jun 2009
"Show Off:)"
LOL, Maggie:)
There is always that feeling of guilt when you're doing well and another person is not...
Your story shows something to the NEW and the OLD alike (like me)...
For example, when I look at you, I see someone who was dx'd in the same year that I was...someone who has had recurrence like me...and a recurrence again like me.
Having just gone over 15-months clear myself (never happened in my 8-yr fight), I find myself in my own personally uncharted territory.
And then I see you chugging along 4-years clear...
And for a moment, I dare ask myself..."Will I have the same success as Mags has had?"
At 15-months clear in an 8-year battle, I'm still in my infancy stage of being clear and more time has to roll off the clock for me to even consider that I might go as long as you have.
But your story to me, sets the bar high and gives me something to aim for - something to physically see and go for..."hoping" (there's that word) that I've got the chance to "just maybe."
I've been snake bit 3x with this stuff, so I'm a little jaded about what I still think my future holds. But the truth about that, is that I'm just using my own insecurity to shield me against the thoughts and feelings that I have from the inevitable thoughts that cancer will someday find me again...
It's so hard to break the ties that bind...
But, maybe I will be one of those that walks away...next scan would make 21-mos...the one after 27-mos...I might dare to dream then...
But, that's scary for me, because I don't want to fall again, Maggie May.
I was thinking about that this morning when I was showering for work....how hard it is everyday for me still to conform to society and meet all their deadlines and committments...when it's so hard to move and get ready and work like a machine.
And I thought of myself for some reason back in last year's fight...never being up at 6am in the morning...and just sick and bedridden all day long.
I tell you, Maggie...I just can't do this anymore if it comes back...I just hope it's over for me now, like I feel it is over and behind you now...at least it's getting smaller in your rear view mirror.
So, you're not showing off with your good news...I actually liked hearing that this morning...and because of you, I wrote another long winded post...
Our consciences play a mean game of ping-pong when we are deciding to post a good story amidst so much sadness...
But, that is the sole nature of this board...so hearing good stories always water the roots of the foundation that this cancer house is moored to.
Thanks for Hope today...I just talk about it, but you're actually doing it.
Love/Craig
Joined: Jun 2006
Craig
dang you Craig...I am sitting here trying to have a cup of coffee
and I am blubbering and crying all over my keyboard....
I love you with all my heart....
mags
Joined: Oct 2011
I replied to your other post
I replied to your other post abou what great news that is. Your are not bragging. Only giving hope as you said not just to the newly diagnosed but to us veterans as well. Our cases are similar. I am coming up on 7 years since being diagnosed stage IV and have had 3 liver resections
Joined: Jun 2006
wow
wow wow triple wow.....
but I do not want another liver resection today ....hahah but you my dearest give me great hope too
have a big big hug
mags
Joined: Jan 2010
Dear Mags
If this is "showing off" please do it every year so that everyone in ear shot can hear that it is possible to be NED!
Glad you got some needed rest and gladder still that the news was so good!
Hugs and love to you. Keep giving us hope.
Marie who loves kitties
Joined: Jan 2012
Just landed in traction ...
... from doing back flips, that's so awesome, Mags! Congrats on continued NED.
Joined: Mar 2010
Show off
Yes, keep it up. It's good for all of us to hear your good news. Happy for you.
Joined: Aug 2012
Awesome! You guys keep
Awesome! You guys keep showing off!! I hope you are celebrating your good news.
Joined: Mar 2009
yay
great news! and no you are not showing off please don't say that. any news of ned is hope for those still in battle
Joined: Feb 2011
Mags this just shows what IS
Mags this just shows what IS POSSIBLE!!! Great news!!!
Joined: Mar 2012
YES
Mags, THANK you for the good news and the hope. We are nearing "our" 1 year cancerversary and so we need good news to keep calm.
Hugs from Germany
Petra
Joined: Nov 2010
don't stop showing off
enjoy the good news, get some sleep and keep sharing.
hugs,
Pete
Joined: May 2011
This is the most beneficial
This is the most beneficial 'showing off' I've ever experienced. Your good news is welcome and provides much hope. NED should never be underground.
Enjoy the good news!
Hugs,
Cathleen Mary
Joined: Apr 2004
Mags
Replied to your scanxiety post but lost it on posting and didn't have the energy to repost so thought I really must reply to this great news. Please take time to enjoy and celebrate without any guilt or worries of showing off. Anyone who fights this illness deserves to celebrate any moment of hope and positivity that comes along and ere are many here who will share in your celebrations-myself included.
I hope also by really recognising the scale of this great news and what it really means in your journey it might add to eroding some of the doubts and anxieties that overwhelm whenever it is time for tests and scans- it really is true that in time those feelings reduce even if it didn't feel that way for you over this week.
Thank you for giving us all something to celebrate,
With love,
Steve
Joined: Jul 2012
Wonderful news! I really
Wonderful news! I really needed some cheering up... I am just having a couple of down days....I don't know if is fatigue or just a slight case of thinking too much about what might be. Your story gives me encouragement ..l that there hope for the long term.
Alex
Joined: Aug 2011
Thank you so much for
Thank you so much for "showing off"! This is the kind of news I love to hear.
So happy for you.
Light to you.
Laura
Joined: Apr 2011
Well now......please do not
Well now......please do not withhold good news. We need to hear it. You have been a tremendous inspiration.....and you are so, so, kind.
I would love to sip coffee with you someday in YOUR cabin. lol.
Joined: Jul 2011
Congratulations!
Mags, I am so excited about your good news ... I am excited for you, of course, but also happy for me. Your good news has inspired a lot of hope and optimism in me at a time when I was feeling suddenly very vulnerable. Thank you for sharing your journey and all the best to you.
Joined: Nov 2001
Well I guess
That means the glass is half full and I'm glad it is,,,,Big hugs Maggie. Ron.
Joined: Mar 2010
Always loving the good news!
Keep it coming, Mags! Sending lots of love,
Alice
Joined: Sep 2011
What fantastic news....I am
What fantastic news....I am sooo happy for you! You must be so releived! There is nothing worse in this world than waiting for scan results!!!!
Joined: Apr 2012
hope
Yes, there is hope for all. And posts like yours prove it can be survived. Continued good luck to you!!!+
Joined: Mar 2012
Sharing is not showing off
Mags,
You give hope to alot of people. Continue to share - that is how we help each other. It helps us not fixate on our own situations.
Joined: Mar 2011
MAGGIE!!!!! I am so happy
MAGGIE!!!!!
I am so happy for you. We all need great news and I hope to give everyone more hope by next Monday or late Friday. I am coming up on 19 months NED. So we will see.
But, as for you, my dear, may you be shouting your good news as you blow out the candles for your 100 birthday.
Biggggg hugsss, judy
Joined: Jul 2012
outstanding!
and you are not bragging! you should be shouting from the roof top to the whole world! this news gives all of us a boost of hope so please always let us know. it really helps us.
hugs
judy
Joined: Sep 2012
Congratulations! Curious
Congratulations!
Curious about your lifestyle. Diet, foods you avoid etc... Do you take cimetidine, MCP or any other supplement? Whatever you're doing, you should keep it up. I seem to recall you being from Ontario. Also wondering what hospital did your liver resections.
Thanks,
Chelsea
Joined: Jan 2011
Thank You
This is just wanted and needed to hear today. You give hope! Congratulations and much love!
Joined: Apr 2010
Hey Mags
I needed that right about now. Thanks for posting!!
Winter Marie
Joined: Apr 2009
Mags
So great to say "I told you so". I never get to say that one at home. My hubby always does. LOL
Luv Ya,
Wolfen
Joined: May 2011
Winter Marie
Thinking of you this beautiful Fall Day...Hope and Prayers for you.
NB
Joined: Jan 2009
Mags
Mags,
I celebrate with you my friend!!! What joy to hear the words that you are clear! Thank you for sharing the joy.
Aloha,
Kathleen
Joined: Jun 2006
oh dear friends
thank you so very much for well wishes....
a note for Chelsea....yes I am in Ontario and my surgeries were done in London at the University Hospital by Dr. Douglas Quan.
To answer your question about life style no I do not take anything other than a multi vitamin. I go the local YMCA and exercise moderately but I also eat, drink and do pretty much anything i like. I do not smoke ....that's about it....I cannot think there is anything in my lifestyle that particularly contributes to my NEDness
good luck to your husband...
mags
Joined: Nov 2001
HMMMM
Now I have scanxiety. Saw the doc today . I have to have x-rays of my chest and a ctpa scan of my heart and lungs. trying to find why I wakein panic at night unable to get enough oxygen. I breath ok just don't absorb enough oxy. Ron.
Joined: Jun 2006
hmmmmmmm indeed
well dang it Ronnie.....what the heck is that about.??? whatever it is you must be scared in the night without enough oxy
sorry you have another blip added to your plate Ron.....we are here...and for sure I have your little old colonial hand in mine. Any idea of scan dates????
hugs....mags
Joined: Jan 2010
Hi Ron
Have you had a sleep apnea test? If not perhaps they can do one.
It can definately cause the panic of not enough oxy while sleeping, and sounds like a reasonable explanation if you are not having the problem while awake. My son has sleep apnea and does much better now that he has the c-pap machine for night time.
Praying for best results on the tests.
Hugs,
Marie who loves kitties
Joined: Nov 2001
Hi Marie & Mags
I had an apnea test a few years back. I had the leads on all night. The apnea doc said that I did not stop breating but I did stop absorbing enough oxygen. She did not even suggest trying a machine just looked at me from head to toe and said you are a big bloke just lose some weight and you will be fine. Same reaction I got from a gp when I asked for a colonoscopy years ago. When I asked If I could still have a scope. She said 'what don't you understand about too fat' The rest is history.
Unfortunately I do get the problem when I am awake. It is not asthma but it is asthma like. It's like when you have been under water and you break through the surface and take a deep breath. Trouble is the big breath doesn't help. I use a ventolin puffer and after ten minutes it seems to help. It seems like some sort of inflamation in my lungs. The ct scan I think is to rule out cancer ,small blood clots or other mould infections. after that we go to other nastier possibilities . My neuropathy is so bad I can hardly walk and my hands are getting bad,it has affected my voice and swallowing. He hinted that my symptoms can also be caused by neurological problems like ms or mnd. I will get the scans done next week and take it from there
Joined: Jun 2006
dear friend
oh Ron...this sounds so hard for you..is there any chance of mould because of all the floods you have been through?
don't jump too far ahead...
gosh you have had such a hard row ....okay...scans next week...no panic till then...here any time you want to talk....
thinking about you dear boy
mags
Joined: Nov 2001
they considered it
Urgent ,had them done today. What an amatuer hour . The technician tried three times to hit a vein ,once in my right arm and twice in my left. He was in a foul temper and he called a doctor in to do it. He put it in the back or my left hand. The plug blew out of the canula and I sprayed everything with blood including the surly tech.Now I get to wait over the weekend. I have been wondering about fungal infections. They are not good,hard to get rid of. I'll worry about that on monday,I have to work most of the weekend. Hugs Ron.
Joined: Nov 2001
they considered it
Urgent ,had them done today. What an amatuer hour . The technician tried three times to hit a vein ,once in my right arm and twice in my left. He was in a foul temper and he called a doctor in to do it. He put it in the back or my left hand. The plug blew out of the canula and I sprayed everything with blood including the surly tech.Now I get to wait over the weekend. I have been wondering about fungal infections. They are not good,hard to get rid of. I'll worry about that on monday,I have to work most of the weekend. Hugs Ron.
Joined: Apr 2009
Ron
Have they checked you for congestive heart failure? Even though hubby has pacemaker and is on many heart meds, he has been hospitalized several times because his heart just can't pump hard enough to remove the fluids from his body. He gets fluid in his lungs and then feels like he is suffocating. They give him IV lasix and he pees out about 10 gallons. LOL
Seriously, though, I wonder if this could be the problem. Hope you have an answer on Monday.
Luv,
Wolfen
Joined: Nov 2001
Hi Wolfen
When I first started suffering from edema they sent me to a heart specialist. He did a stress test and a heart ultra-sound. He said my heart was excellent. I had further tests that showed my idneys are not so good. My current protein loss is 2.7 grams a day which isn't good .I take micardis plus to lower bp and it also contains a diuretic.Best of luck to your hubby it is not a nice feeling taking a deep breath for nothing,Ron.
Joined: Aug 2011
Hi Mags, I really need to
Hi Mags, I really need to hear the success stories so thank you, thank you for posting your good news. I hope no one ever has hard feelings because someone is posting good news; that is one of the ways we are able to keep hoping. Congradulations and keep up the NED!
Brenda
Joined: May 2011
Please Continue to Share
We are so grateful for all of you who have been there fighting through this journey. But most of all we are glad to have you hear sharing that there is always hope.
Enjoy that Fall weather at your beautiful cabin and feel that wonderful joy in appreciating life.
Thank you so much
Prayers for continued good health.
NB
Joined: Aug 2011
Yay!
So happy to hear your wonderful news. It is wonderful and very inspiring to hear NED news for Stage 4. I tell my husband about every single one because I think sometimes it is easy to get very discouraged but seeing you and others gives hope to others so thank you so much for sharing and congrats on NED. Praying for many more years of NED for you. Hugs, Teri
Joined: Aug 2010
Goooooood!
Champagne! Lots of champagne!
Joined: Feb 2010
wow
Great news! BTW in the years now that I have read your posts, you have been nothing but encouraging. Anyone who would think you were showing off would have to be self-obsessed and know nothing of you.
Rick
Joined: Nov 2011
Congrats of four years cancer FREE!
That's awesome news.
Joined: Feb 2009
Wonderful
What a relief for you. Bet you are sleeping much better now. It's always good hearing good news. Glad you shared that with us.
Kim