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My mom

Posts: 1
Joined: Feb 2011

My mom was diagnosed with Stage 4 Renal cancer last August. She had not been feeling well for a very long time but hid it because she had no insurance and couldn't afford to go to the doctor. By the time she did it had already spread to her bones, spine, thyroid and many other places. They did two rounds of chemo and radiation but it did not halt the spread of the disease. My mom died last Thursday, February 17th at 3:30 p.m. EST. My brother and I had planned to fly out to see her one last time but both of us had financial issues and were not able to book our flights until last Monday. We had hoped and prayed she would be able to fight long enough to see us, which was her greatest wish. I got the call from my father last Thursday at 4 p.m. and I have been totally devastated since. We are flying out tomorrow but it is now for the memorial service. I feel tremendous guilt about not making it in time. It still feels so unreal to me that she is gone. I keep thinking about all the things she will never do again. She was only 64 years old. Her birthday is in April. She never got to meet my two grandchildren who are 3 and 1 1/2. I myself am only 41 and I feel like I've lost a huge part of who I am. My dad and I are not close so I'm feeling awkward and uncomfortable about being there now that she is gone. I am going for her, I hope she knows how much I love her and how sad I am that she is gone.

I found this site this morning and just wanted to post something about her. I wish the whole world could know how loving and wonderful my mom was.

icemantoo's picture
Posts: 3359
Joined: Jan 2010

Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. It is too bad that your mother did not have insurance as RCC when caught early can be cured by surgery. If she had reached 65 she would have at least had medicare to take care of the lion's share of the cost.

Lynn Smith
Posts: 1265
Joined: Mar 2011

I am sorry for the loss of your mom.I wish you could have been there before she passed but she knew you wanted to be but couldn't.She will always be in your heart. So sorry about the insurance.She should have seen if there was some way to get help.I know it is tough but when people are having medical issues there should be help.

Your mom was my age. I turned 64 March 1.

Cafewoman53's picture
Posts: 737
Joined: Jul 2010

I'm so sorry for your loss. I am a mother with cancer and trust me she knows that you loved her. Try not to be uncomfortable with your Dad, she loved you both you have that to share.If it is possible you now have a special angel watching over you and your little ones.

Posts: 13
Joined: Feb 2011

All I can say is how sorry I am for your family's pain. I experienced the loss of my mom to ovarian cancer when she was 49, so I know how devastating it is. I wear a bracelet with the orange ribbon that represents kidney cancer and a silver heart that says, "Where there is love, there is life." Maybe you could get one and wear it in remembrance of your mom? Things like that bring me comfort. It was $15 on http://causesandheroes.com/pinkribbonwherethereislovebracelet-2-2-1. I know things might be tight for you and if you think that the bracelet would help you, but you don't have the money, I'll be happy to purchase one for you.
I'm wishing you and your family peace.

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