Update on doctors appt

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Kat11
Kat11 Member Posts: 1,931 Member
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
What the heck was I thinking !! that I was going to see the onc and rads man and they were going to tell me the cancer went away. I knew this was coming, I new it. I started talking so fast my husband asked me if I was on some kind of drug like speed. This was when the doctor left the room for a minute. My girlfriend was taking notes for me and she just looked at me like I was crazy. SO I looked at both of them and started to cry. I knew, why am I doing this I knew. The port is going in Monday. Yes, I saw the post on ports. Little worried. Get to be put to sleep again yea. The chemo will start july 8 for 3 maybe 6 months. Have it all down on paper just don't want to read it all right now. Being told once is enough for today. Herceptin weekly 52 weeks. Was asked to do a study. Its the Allto study. I have to tell them monday if I am going to do it or not. I think I will. Then to top it off Rads for 6 weeks everyday. after chemo is done. My answer to side affects was much more than I would have thought. Lets see, Heart failer, infection, call if fever is 100.5, Anemia,Bleeding, Menopause, Hair loss, nail problems oh i almost forgot nausea. She gave me 3 drugs for that to get filled. I am so sorry you guys, I know most of you have been through this and came out the other side, but, but I don't know what I am thinking. I am telling you it was like I expected something different, but I knew better. Crazy I guess. So I am going to a chemo class wednesday after they check the port. Yep I am going on a tour. They will answer anymore questions we might have, and they will then give us some hints and whatever. It's really nice to have that. I say us because there will be others with me. Chemo buddies. So thats it for now. Long afternoon, and bad storms today. Going to ask for xanax.
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  • mmontero38
    mmontero38 Member Posts: 1,510
    #2
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    Hang in there Kat. You will
    Hang in there Kat. You will get through it. It's all overwhelming at first and very scary when you don't know what to expect. But take a deep breath and take one day at a time. We are here to support you in any way we can. Once, you've absorbed all the information they threw at you, post any question you may have and we'll all try our best to answer. Hugs, Lili
  • Akiss4me
    Akiss4me Member Posts: 2,188
    #3
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    awwww, Kat
    definitely go for the xanax!! Your just like me though. Everytime I saw the Doctor or had one more test, even though I knew better, I expected something different. I think that is just our human nature. And then when we find out that we will be doing the same thing as everyone else, it's somewhat of a shocker & let down. Hang in there, you will make it through and we will be by your side the whole time. :) Pammy
  • cats_toy
    cats_toy Member Posts: 1,462 Member
    #4
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    don't worry too much Kat
    they have to tell you all of the side effects, but that does not mean you will have them, every reacts differently, and they just need to cover all bases. You will do great! just like you have been all along, and if you don't, I will come by and kick their **** for you! how's that for a plan?
    let us know how it goes!
    =^..^=
  • taleena
    taleena Member Posts: 1,612 Member
    #5
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    Kat... I hope you can feel
    Kat... I hope you can feel me giving you a hug, gentle yet firm, and holding your hand. I know that today must have been pretty tough.. You've been on my mind all day. I am glad you posted tonight, I am sorry for the way you are feeling. If there was something that I could say that would make you feel better, I would say it a thousand times. However, I can offer this, I am here whenever you need me... and so is everyone else here. Please try to do something nice for yourself... go easy on yourself...Sending you my best wishes...

    Hugs, Love & Friendship

    ~T
  • Aortus
    Aortus Member Posts: 967
    #6
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    Kat, you will make it just fine.
    Yes, starting chemo is scary. Having the chemo class will help - be sure to ask each and every question which pops into your mind.

    What will help most of all is the knowledge that you DON'T have to get nauseated. Moopy had a rough first round with the chemo: turns out she can't tolerate Compazine. The nurse practitioner took out Compazine and replaced it with Ativan. Problem solved. Not that there weren't bumps in the road, or bad days. There were. But the Moopster came through with flying colors. AND SO WILL YOU.

    God bless,
    Joe
  • jnl
    jnl Member Posts: 3,869 Member
    #7
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    So sorry Kat. You sound
    So sorry Kat. You sound really down. But, you will get thru this! We will all help you in anyway that we can. Take your xanax and take it easy!
  • Jeanne D
    Jeanne D Member Posts: 1,867
    #8
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    Kat
    It sounds like your day was overwhelming Kat. That is a lot to hear and to take in. And like someone said, they have to give you all of the side effects. But, it doesn't mean that it will happen to you. So, try to think positive. Remember Kat, chemo will kill the cancer! We will all be here to help you thru this and you know it! Hugs, Jeanne
  • CR1954
    CR1954 Member Posts: 1,390 Member
    #9
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    Kat.......
    I know that you're completely overwhelmed right now. And it's also a shock, even though you thought you were prepared.
    But if you take EACH thing at a time, it will be easier.
    That pretty much sounds like how my treatments went and I am still doing Herceptin. But that is a piece of cake.
    They always give you a long list of possible side effects, but rest assured, you will not have to worry about ALL of them.
    Did the onc say that you will have a MUGA scan done before you start? They usually do to make sure your heart is working well before chemo begins. That is also a piece of cake.

    Love ya & ready to help where I can...

    CR
  • outdoorgirl
    outdoorgirl Member Posts: 1,565
    #10
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    You will
    make it through,Kat!I know this is not what you wanted,nobody did here.I know that it's overwhelming.And not your pick of how you would spend a summer(when I had chemo,it wasn't my pick for how I would want to spend the holidays in 2007).
    Time to take those baby steps,face everything,and fight!! We'll walk you through and you'll be okay.
    Take notes during your chemo orientation! Just remember,your doctors are going to use the big guns to blow the smithereens out of your cancer!
    Love,Patty
  • tjhay
    tjhay Member Posts: 655
    #11
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    Update
    Hello Kat
    You have started on a journey that at time will seem like it is more then you can handle. I am not going to tell you that it well be easy, cause its not. However I will tell you that it is more then doable.
    I am coming to the end of my journey in just a couple of days, and as I look back at the last year I realize that there were some bad times, but it was no where as bad as i thought it would be. As far as the side effects, well like the others said you will experience some of them and some you wont. I lost my hair, but have had no problems with my nails. My first chemo was hard on my tummy, the others were not. Sure I experienced some nausea but the meds they gave me pretty much insured that it did not keep me down for long.
    At first it is all very overwhelming, but as time goes on it will become routine. The secret is not to let keep you from living your life. Keep doing your usual, you may not be able to as much at once, but with everything that you do accomplish everyday the better you will feel about yourself, and about your life. One day at a time, and you are not alone in this. We are all here for you, as is your family.
    Tj
  • dmc_emmy
    dmc_emmy Member Posts: 549
    #12
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    Kat-there's not much more for me to add...
    except that I, too, will be there right alongside you. You will not be going through this alone. I know we all wait to hear those words,"All clear," and, though it's hard to believe, the chemo is part of that hope. It sounds like you are going to a very supportive treatment center, I didn't have a class prior to chemo, and the staff there will play a huge part in making it as easy as possible for you to through it.

    Take a friend with you, take things to do and to eat, and try to make this a time to reflect on the good things that will come out of all this...those days will come. In the meantime, we will be with you. You sound like a very strong and confident woman, though this ca**r has a way of setting one back a bit, with the right support and attitude we all make it through and you will, too.
    dmc
  • The1percen
    The1percen Member Posts: 135
    #13
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    Hi Kat...
    I have to say, i have read your post a half dozen times... you see, i am going for a mammogram and to see a surgeon by the end of the month. I have large lumps on my breasts and large lymphnodes all over the place (BTW... incase you hadn't really looked at my pic... yes, I'm a guy). Now sure it may be something "simple" or it may be stage4! I have been trying to prepare for the worst, except, I don't know what WORST is!!! I would read your post and imagine that is me... and as positive as everyone wants me to be... it's very hard when in your heart you what it is, because of all the risk factors and knowing your body. I hope and pray I am wrong but I really foresee myself making that same kind of post in a couple weeks. Meanwhile I hope ALL goes well for you, please know we are all HERE FOR YOU, no judgements, no apologies, just let it out and let us comfort-n-support you. This one awesome bunch of SURVIVORS and even more FRIENDS!!!!
    Take Care,
    Mike
  • sunnygirl
    sunnygirl Member Posts: 57 Member
    #14
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    Yes, it's terrifying
    Yes, Kat, it sure is overwhelming from the "front" side. I remember only too well.

    Take deep breaths, cry if you feel like crying--let it out. If you want to yell and scream--do it!! You didn't ask for this, but you got it anyway. Sorry you have to be in this club.

    Now--take it one day at a time. Let your support team do what they can do--it helps them feel useful and needed. Know that the boards are here with shoulders to cry on and special support to give. I've found it so much easier to talk with someone who's been through it or is going through treatment.

    Prayers and gentle hugs,
    Cheryl
  • lynn1950
    lynn1950 Member Posts: 2,570
    #15
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    Take it one step at a time
    and we are here for you to answer your questions, cybersympathize, and just understand what you are going through. Being a cancer survivor is a terrible job - the pay is awful; the hours are long; and I have yet to figure out the benefits, for myself at least. We will share this journey with you. Lynn
  • Alexis F
    Alexis F Member Posts: 3,598
    #16
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    lynn1950 said:

    Take it one step at a time
    and we are here for you to answer your questions, cybersympathize, and just understand what you are going through. Being a cancer survivor is a terrible job - the pay is awful; the hours are long; and I have yet to figure out the benefits, for myself at least. We will share this journey with you. Lynn

    I agree with Lynn. Just
    I agree with Lynn. Just take it one step at a time Kat.
  • dyaneb123
    dyaneb123 Member Posts: 950
    #17
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    Alexis F said:

    I agree with Lynn. Just
    I agree with Lynn. Just take it one step at a time Kat.

    Hey Kat
    I'll have my 2nd
    Hey Kat
    I'll have my 2nd chemo next week. My worst moment was walking into the chemo room for the tour ...the reality of it just floored me. After that bad moment though , I was ok. When I actually went for the 1st treatment, I wasn't freaked out at all. The chemo process was painless, and I didn't get sick at all exept for a little diarea(result of my chocolate milk diet for 5 days...eat!)So I hope it goes smoothly for you too. Just take the anti nausea meds.
    I had one of those denial moments with a friend of mine. Funnily enough when she told me to be sure to get some Imodium just in case, I said "that's ok, I don't plan to get diarea." She
    comes back at me with " well, you didn't plan to get cancer either...."hmmmm, well thanks to her I had my Imodium on hand and boy did I need it!LOL!
    Dee
  • Christmas Girl
    Christmas Girl Member Posts: 3,682 Member
    #18
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    It's all very scary...
    And, of course, it's overwhelming. No one ever wants this...

    Please be assured that it is ALL doable. Maybe not always easy, but doable. You need to do all of it in order to insure your future.

    Sounds like you've got great support from family and friends, and good medical care on your side. And, you'll have us.

    Kind regards, Susan
  • Kat11
    Kat11 Member Posts: 1,931 Member
    #19
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    Christmas Girl said:

    It's all very scary...
    And, of course, it's overwhelming. No one ever wants this...

    Please be assured that it is ALL doable. Maybe not always easy, but doable. You need to do all of it in order to insure your future.

    Sounds like you've got great support from family and friends, and good medical care on your side. And, you'll have us.

    Kind regards, Susan

    I thank you all for making
    I thank you all for making me feel better. I did have a hard time yesterday. I really did not expect to,but who new. I will take it one day at a time. They sure don't give you much time off. I did manage however to work this chemo around a family vacation in July, over the 4th. My whole family and some friends are going to a beautiful place in wisconsin. Big lake, lot of fishing for hubby and grandkids. I was not going to miss this, and my doctor (onc) did not want me to. Thats why the port is going in Monday so I can heal a bit and it can be checked before I go. Its amazing to me that I feel like I have known you all for ever. I am so grateful for that.
    Friendship and Hugs
    Kathy
  • RE
    RE Member Posts: 4,591 Member
    #20
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    Kat11 said:

    I thank you all for making
    I thank you all for making me feel better. I did have a hard time yesterday. I really did not expect to,but who new. I will take it one day at a time. They sure don't give you much time off. I did manage however to work this chemo around a family vacation in July, over the 4th. My whole family and some friends are going to a beautiful place in wisconsin. Big lake, lot of fishing for hubby and grandkids. I was not going to miss this, and my doctor (onc) did not want me to. Thats why the port is going in Monday so I can heal a bit and it can be checked before I go. Its amazing to me that I feel like I have known you all for ever. I am so grateful for that.
    Friendship and Hugs
    Kathy

    HUGS*HUGS*HUGS*
    Hi Kathy,

    I just got back from a week of camping with my family from Texas and Arizona, it was great and I know you will enjoy your time in Wisconsin even more! I am glad you are feeling a tad better, it can be so overwhelming. It is true that you will have some of the side effects mentioned to you, but certainly not all of them and they are controllable via meds your oncologist will give to you. We are here for you Kathy in any way that we can be.

    My best to you,

    RE
  • ladybug22
    ladybug22 Member Posts: 646
    #21
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    up date
    please hang in there you will come out on the other side and the herceptin was a cake walk for me with no side affects the port is great you will have up and downs so one day at a time love and hugs comming your way

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