Sep 21, 2013 - 1:31 am
It's been way too long since I said hello. I do follow all your posts, and keep you all close.
Summer has kept me very busy, flying cross country multiple times. I am in the midst of planning my next flight. Ugg
I have been buring my head in the sand, and trying to avoid docs and tests and everything that goes along with that. The big fear creeps in and I just seem to freeze.
I know that there are medical issues to be addressed and I know that I will. Just need to get my courage up. I seem to be sorely lacking in courage these days.
I am planning on getting the BRCA testing done within the month. For those of you who don't know what that is, it is a genetic test that tells you about your likely chances of getting breast and ovarian cancer. Since my risk is already elevated because of the ovarian tumors and my family history of breast and ovarian cancer, it is the smart test to have done. I have daughters and granddaughters. So if I test positive, then this will help them be very proactive. If I test negative, then we keep looking for the genetic link. With all the cancer I have and had and all that is in my family, well it's just scary to think about..
My immediate health concerns are still fatigue, which may just be the way it will be and still having pain issues. That scares me the most.
Gosh I sound like such a scardycat, and I am usually so much stronger that that. I think life and all the health stuff has just worn me down.
I feel like an old timer in the cancer world, but still I find it hard some days to just feel positive and not afraid of the tomorrows.
Huge hugs to all, and know that I think of you all the time.