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New to Kidney Cancer - dealing with new emotions

Bubbs21
Posts: 43
Joined: Jul 2012

Good day,

I thought I understood the emotion of cancer, having lost my paternal grandfather to lung cancer, my father to multiple mylenoma and my mother to lung cancer. However, after 6 months of investigation for hypertension, an abdominal CT with and without contrast showed liver cysts and 2 solid mass tumours on the left kidney deemed likely RCC. As the cardiologist advised me that my neurological, cardiac and lung functions were normal, I was thrilled. He proceeded to read portions of the CT report to me and explain that as the CT was only of the upper abdomen, that a full MRI or CT is required to determine if there were metastic tumours. He proceeded to tell me that he would refer me to an oncologist and order the MRI. He asked if I wanted a note to be off work, while we sort things out. I didn't understand and just smiled. I took it in and am surprised that I remember any details. That was friday. I have since gotten a copy of the CT report. The masses are 2cm in size.

So here is my question. I understand the physical issues. It is the emotional. Should I be working? I feel able one moment and an emotional mess the next. I can focus for an hour and then can't remember anything the next. I can't sleep and am afraid of the dark (new experience).

Insights and advice are appreciated.

icemantoo's picture
icemantoo
Posts: 1479
Joined: Jan 2010

Bubbs21,

I sure was scared Sh--less when at age 59 I was told I had Kidney Cancer from what I thought were routine tests. And with 2 separate tumors of 2 cm you are no doubt facing a left nepherectomy (removal of the left kidney) which is major surgery. Not fun. I did not enjoy it either. And likely RCC for statistical purposes means that there is a very high probability that it is cancer. So what.

At 2 cm and even 2 cm x 2 on the same Kidney you are one lucky person. Your cure rate for a 2 or 4 cm tumor from the surgery alone is close to 100% and I doubt that the second tumor on the same kidney is going to reduce that number although it likely will reduce your option to a full nepherectomy which is what I had 10 years ago next week.

As far as work, keep busy. you are going to have a month or 2 to rest after the surgery. Take some time to read a lot of the stories and posts on this board. With the size of your tumors you are joining our club with a lot less baggage than most of our members. After you have the surgery you can tell people that you had Cancer, not that you have it. We even tell jokes on this boaed to manage things easier.

Now ours is a very special group with only 3% of the Cancers. Unless it spreads (which yours should not) we stay away from Chemo and drugs after the surgery.

My wife tried to get me to relax in the month before the surgery and took me to a B&B on the Canadian side of Lake Huron. And then to dinner at the nicest British restaurant in town. Eveything was great until thaey brought out the featured menu items on the cart. You guessed it- kidney pie. Our emotions do tend to get the better of us.

If I can get thru this anybody can,

Icemantoo

garym's picture
garym
Posts: 1651
Joined: Nov 2009

Hi Bubbs,

"You have cancer and need surgery." its the price of admission to the roller coaster ride of emotion you are now on, everyone here understands what you are going through and will help you get through it, there is a solid base of knowledgeable and compassionate people here, welcome to the club.

What you are feeling is absolutely normal, most likely you are seeing only the negative sides of it, this is normal too. You can turn it around, you are extremely fortunate that it has been caught early, it doesn't feel like it yet, but you've just won the lottery. Compared to what most cancer patients must endure to survive this surgery is a very small price to pay, begin looking forward to it with great anticipation as the life giving gift that it is. The best way to keep those inner demons at bay is to stay busy, so poor yourself into work like never before, catch up on all the projects you've been putting off around the house, make preparations now that will ease your recovery when you get home from the hospital, start a new diet and exercise program, in short, stay as busy as you can for as long as you can every day, this will all be behind you before you know it.

In time all the fear and bad emotions do fade, it has been nearly 3 years for me and I can tell you that it changed my life for the better, it will do the same for you, I promise. I encourage you to read our stories, ask questions, or come here to vent when you need to, we understand and we'll help you any way we can. Keep us posted.

Good luck and Godspeed,

Gary

Bubbs21
Posts: 43
Joined: Jul 2012

I thank you Iceman and Gary for your time, and support. You both have given generously with your responses. It has only been 5 days since I got the test results, but I feel like I have become a walking dictionary and already have a set of vocabulary, that never existed in my world before. I am anzxious to have the referal to the oncologist and to get on with this. Any denial, anger or bargaining is behind me. I am in a stage of acceptance and want to act.

I have learnt as you both have pointed out, that an early incident and detection is a blessing and the difference not only in treatment but chances of survival. I am also learning that when I am busy I am not focusing on the negative aspects but continuing to live life...which this is all about. My husband and I took steps to improve our health with eating better and being more active over the last 2 years. We will continue together on this journey of self-care and self-improvement.

My challenge emotionally is that I am exhausted physically and emotionally from the numerous changes and challenges in our lives the last 3 years (care of aligning parents including cancer treatment appointments, and dementia; executing parents estates; loss of other family members; job changes; job loss; son in a motorcycle accident who is still recovering and needing help; relocation to a new community to remain gainfully employed; my own other health problems). It takes every once of my being to get going each day and to deal with the re-starts if I take a break. Once I get going I am fine...exccept, I don't have the stamina I used to have. I know balance is important as is keeping busy. But when you are burnt-out it is not a good starting point.

On another related matter of emotion, perhaps because I have been limited in what I share with family and friends (I want to have a treatment plan), I find I feel really lonely, and isolated even when I am with a group of people.

I hold a very senior position in an organization, and need to ensure that I do not loose the confidence of my boss or staff as this unfolds and hence one of the reasons for not disclosing until I have a treatment plan in place.

On another note, a colleague, not knowing about the situation, shared a link with me. It is Steve Jobs, CEO and co-founder of Apple and Pixar: providing the address at the graduating class at Standford University: "Pursue your dreams and see the opportunities incl in life's setbacks."

http://www.ted.com/talks/steve_jobs_how_to_live_before_you_die.html

His perspective on cancer and the life chaning impact it had on him was eye-opening for me.

Sorry for rambling...this is very theraputic and helps me to organize my thoughts and feelings. I look forward to engaging with everyone on the CSN. In time, perhaps I can give as much as you all do.

Cheers.

alice124's picture
alice124
Posts: 860
Joined: Mar 2012

Bubbs,

I'm late in responding to your postings, but it looks like you've received some great advice here, and I'm hoping that advice has aided you in handling all this. I also hope your talk with your son and husband goes well. Make sure they understand you need to get this out and be able to talk about it.

I saw your plan and I'm betting your "to do" lists are off the charts. I can see how very organized you are and how HARD trying to relax is going to be for you. But take the great advice you've been given from Vin, Brea, Ice, Gary, and Dog Rescuer. Take care of you. I personally think you should work as long as you are able to do so. Keeping that mental edge is important.

I have a friend who many years ago was diagnosed with breast cancer. Even though her diagnosis was severe, treatment was available which she started. At the same time, she decided to leave work and spend all her waking moments with her family and her young grandchildren, which is fine if it is what YOU need. A few months later I met her for lunch. Before the appetizer was over, I said to her, "You need to get back to work. I feel like I'm having lunch with Mary Poppins."

She had changed from a professional woman to a Disney character, vocabulary, interests, everything. Once I said it, she just stared for a moment and then we both broke down into a cry and laugh hysteria. She admitted that she wasn't doing what she wanted to do but what she thought others expected of her. She said she was "trying to be a good grandmother so her grandchildren would remember her fondly." She admitted, however, that she was suffering from a lack of mental stimulation. I told her to "Get back to work, make more money, and increase your grandchildrens' inheritance. They will remember you more fondly."
(I wasn't being harsh, we talked like that to each other.) Bottom line, she did go back to work and after not too long a time, she went into remission. I think mental attitude and clarity is an important piece of the puzzle in your fight to beat cancer.

Good luck to you in your fight. Kick it!

DogRescuer's picture
DogRescuer
Posts: 49
Joined: Feb 2012

I think it's good that you're realizing how many life changes have each by itself has taken an emotional toll on you. The cancer diagnosis on top of everything else is overwhelming. Acknowledging this daily will help you give yourself some slack. Take breaks more often, designate someone else to carry some of your load, eat dessert FIRST!

Now. I'm going to sound like a drug pusher, but here it is. If you were *ever* to deserve some Xanex (relieves anxiety), it just might be now. I don't take them often, but I know it's on the top shelf, if I'm having one of those days. Also, Ambian might help for the sleep issues.

Go easy on yourself. Come here often and vent. We totally understand what you're going through.

vdm13
Posts: 35
Joined: Jul 2012

Bubbs,

Sorry to have you here, but it's a great group of folks here who have already helped me in my new journey. I was diagnosed in April with stage 4 grade IV metastatic RCC. Had my left kidney, adrenal gland, a slice of my spleen and a dozen lymph nodes removed. Now we're working on the mets in my lungs, near my spine and a spot in the other kidney.

I was floored and devastated by the news. I am only 42 years old, have a loving wife and two little girls, ages 7 and 11, and need to do everything I can to live.

In my case, I took a few days off to gain my composure, then worked up until the day of the operation. My job - God bless them - gave me all the time I needed to recover and have me on a very flexible schedule as I go thru my treatment. For me, work is an important part of my program. I need the mental challenge and it keeps me occupied. I also spend time meditating, as much as possible with the family, and more time than I probably should researching the monster and how to beat it.

I too hold an executive position in a large company. I shared the news with my management, of course, but also with my colleagues and direct reports. So me, they make up an important part of my team.

Not sure where I am going with this, except to try and give you encouragement and to let you know you're not alone. Your report sounds promising and I hope we will hear from you during your recovery and when you report back that you are free of cancer! You will beat the beast!

Best of luck and Godspeed.

Vin

Bubbs21
Posts: 43
Joined: Jul 2012

Wow.....I certainly understand why they refer to it as a journey. With your encouragement and guidance, I am taking additional steps to take care of me and those who are important to me.

Communication;
I shared what I know (and don't) with my sisters last night. My son and husband are on a road trip and due back in a week. I have no need to sppoil their trip and time together so, I will update them when they get home. I have a meeting with my boss today and plan to fill him in and assure hime that other than treatment and recovery, that I am there for the organization and the team.
For others, time will tell.

Emotions:
Thanks for the acknowledgement of my cumulative stress from all the life changing events. I have booked an appoitment with a family doctor to seek advice on the anxiety episodes. I also want to look into meditation or exercise such as yoga or tia chi.

Taking care of the future:
I realized that I have been delinquent in keeping my will and beneficiaries for insurance policies up to date and will take action to correct that as well. I have also started a list of questions (some from my sisters) to ask when I see the oncologist.

Waiting is so hard. I know what to expect dp to all the great resources that are available. But until there is a plan, it is hard. Hell I get anxious from boredom. I am too much a tyoe A personality. Maybe this will help me become a recovering type A personality :)

I know in my heart that the new year will be here in a blink of an eye, the surgery and recovery will be behind me and I will have passed my intiation. After which I can help others who are newly diagnosed.

Wishing everyone a great day.

garym's picture
garym
Posts: 1651
Joined: Nov 2009

Bubbs,

Sounds like you have a great plan to me, all that's missing are a few details about kicking RCC's butt and that most certainly will be falling into place very quickly. You are developing a survivors attitude at a faster pace than most, probably that type A thing, I like the phrase "ATTACK WITH EXTREME PREJUDICE!" it says it all for me. Waiting is the hardest part, concentrating on only the positive parts of all that is happening helps a lot, with a bit of practice it is a skill you can develop that will help you all the way through recovery and beyond. You might also check out the MAARS program by Gerald White, it promotes the use of guided imagery to help your immune system identify and destroy cancer cells and it also creates a sense of inner peace that you might find beneficial. Mr. White is a 20+ years RCC survivor who was once given 3 months to live, he has dedicated his life and personal resources to fighting this disease, the program is inspirational and inexpensive.

Hang in there you are doing great,

Gary

brea588's picture
brea588
Posts: 114
Joined: Jul 2012

Bubbs, I too am waiting til Aug 28th to have partial neph. of right kidney and I get anxious a lot too. My family doc gave me meds for anxiety that helps a lot. The waiting time is horrible. Some days I am ready to go get it done and others I am very afraid. I too feel lonely even when I try to talk to my husband or sis its like they dont want to hear anything about it. Its as if you dont say anything it will just go away. Im ready to kick this cancer in the butt and get back to what I was doing before all this. You too will be fine. Praying for you.

alice124's picture
alice124
Posts: 860
Joined: Mar 2012

brea,

The waiting is horrible. For me, the caretaker, and John, the patient, that's the hardest.

Sit your husband and sister down and let them know how you feel (like you feel they don't want to talk about it). I'm sure they don't mean to make you feel that way, but--in many cases--people think that by recognizing the cancer, it empowers the cancer. But that's not true at all. By talking about the cancer and getting it out in the open, it empowers YOU and that empowerment makes you stronger and more prepared to fight.

Make sure they know that. Believe it or not, talking about it is important for their mental attitude too. Keep us posted.

brea588's picture
brea588
Posts: 114
Joined: Jul 2012

He told me he listens but is so very scared himself he finds it hard to talk about. I understand that. He is there for me i know that. we have been married 39 years and we have always leaned each other and im sure we will continue too. Thanks for ur reply and concern.

alice124's picture
alice124
Posts: 860
Joined: Mar 2012

Great advice Vin. The need of mental challenge is particularly spot-on.

I hope this finds you kicking butt and taking no prisoners! Be sure to keep us posted on your progress.

Bubbs21
Posts: 43
Joined: Jul 2012

Friends, family, frolicking on the beach, fantastic lobster Church dinners, fiddling, funny moments, fireside chats, fishing for tuna, fabulous moonshine, friendly and peaceful cottage...

I just spent a week with friends and family, on the shores of Prince Edward Island. It was the best holiday ever and better than any therapy a doctor could have ordered. I also have started a really low dose anti-anxiety medication. I feel the best I have in years. I am back to work next week for that mental challenge.

The hopefully the wait for surgery won't be too long (still waiting on a date). As my dad used to say, 'don't wish your life away'. So I am trying to find value in each and every day. My new motto is 'live today like its your last, but make decisions that make for a better tomorrow.'

Thanks to all for your sharing and support to each other.

Texas_wedge's picture
Texas_wedge
Posts: 2807
Joined: Nov 2011

Sounds like a lot of b'ing and f 'ing you got up to - must have been a great trip.

In only a fortnight or so since you started this thread, you really seem to have got it taped and the surgery and recovery will be a cakewalk with your new-found balanced and positive take on life. It's all going to be fine.

Texas_wedge's picture
Texas_wedge
Posts: 2807
Joined: Nov 2011

I've come to believe that one of the outstanding values of forums like this is the wisdom posters can impart about how to deal with the emotional issues.

For instance, the posts above by Alice (her memorable lunch with Mary Poppins) Vin, carrying his work colleagues with him, and Bubbs, drawing on such narratives to put her personal plan in place, all supply re-assurance, inspiration and support that are of incalculable value. Even professional counsellors can't offer that sort of assistance (unless they've been there themselves as either a patient or a carer).

The role of the plumbers, and the electricians is critical, of course, but it's all too easy to overlook how crucial it is to get the emotional management right and that's where family and friends and forums like this are so absolutely priceless.

Bubbs21
Posts: 43
Joined: Jul 2012

Unfortuatnely this is my third time around seeking support from a discussion forum for cancer. The first was when my dad was diagnosed with Multiple Mylenoma in 2008 and then when my mom was diagnosed with Lung Cancer in 2009. The value of the forums whether about treatments, nutrition, post-op tricks or just a community of emotional support, the value is incredible and understated.

There is such a huge footprint of knowledge and experience in the history of this forum. It is incredible. Each of us whether we have questions or answers, continue to weave the quilt of community support. I am rambling....I pray to have the strength and where with all to fight, keep my dignity, and my quality of life as so many of you do each and every day.

Bubbs21
Posts: 43
Joined: Jul 2012

So, PEI was fabulous...but seems like a year ago already. The luster of the trip has worn-off quickly and life has set in again. The good news is that my pre-op is scheduled for Aug 29th. However, I have no date for my operation and the surgeon and his staff are on holidays until August 30th. Keeping my fingers crossed that the partial laprascopic nephrectomy (man that's a mouthful) will be in Sept. I know it is my priority. Can't help think about a group trip to Punta Cana that I have booked and paid for for Oct 19-26. I would hate to miss it or disappoint others if I wasn't able to go. So hoping for the surgery really soon :)

Since being back from holidays and on to the normal routine, it has been nothing but normal. The anti-anxiety meds are helping. I have reduced the caffiene in my diet as it was making me squirrly. I pee often, break out in sweats, have facial whitches on the left side of my face, am agitated, anxious and pace constantly, have brain fog, forget even the most important things, am lethargic, sleep deeply and frequently, blood pressure is averaging 95/60. I find myself lonely and avoiding social and work interactions. With family, I find I am reassuring them, and it is soooo draining. Sorry for the rant...thanks for listening and being there.

I just need to get on with this...

garym's picture
garym
Posts: 1651
Joined: Nov 2009

Hi Bubbs,

Sounds like everything is running normal to the process most of us go through with the emotional swings, social avoidance, staying strong for those closest to you, all mixed together with a dose of fear and anxiety, ain't this a fun ride??? It is good that you were able to enjoy PEI and that you have Punta Cana to look forward to, (even if surgery isn't until mid September you'll be fine in time) I predict that the next few weeks will be no more than an unpleasant memory by the time you arrive. Concentrate on staying positive and keeping busy, this will all be behind you before you know it, I promise.

Hang in there,

Gary

Bubbs21
Posts: 43
Joined: Jul 2012

I appreciate the honest perspective and gentle knudge. You Rock!

I guess as a person who normally feels in control, this is challenging me and becoming a growth experience - in that I am hopefully will learn how to deal with things that I can't control....

It is a shame that doctors don't have insight to this or make recommendations for managing emotions from the get go.

THANKS FOR LISTENING.

Texas_wedge's picture
Texas_wedge
Posts: 2807
Joined: Nov 2011

Just a thought - you've experienced wild fluctuations in BP during this year - 198/103 in February and now around 95/60; do you know what causes this? Even young as you are, a pulse pressure of almost 100 was pretty scary! Your figures now are maybe a shade low? With that much variation it doesn't surprise me that you feel a bit lacking in control at times.

Your op will be plain sailing and you should, as Gary says, be well up for that trip in October. You're going to be fine.

Bubbs21
Posts: 43
Joined: Jul 2012

You are a detailed person, Texas_Wedge. Yes my BP did hit a high of 198/103 last February and took 6 weeks to come close to a normal range at 140/90. Then I had a blackout and my BP hit a low of 80/53 and remained in the low range for 6-7 weeks. It is the BP issues that got me to a cardiologist and internist and eventually an ultrasound, CT scan and ultimately ended up here on a new roller coaster. BP is low but the most stable and normal that it has been since Feb. The only abnormality that they have found in the Tumours in the kidney and cysts in the liver. A series of tests all showed healthy (expect for the weigh scales).

Oh by the way thanks for the compliment of being young:)

I feel like I went from feeling like 30 to feeling like 50+ in the last few months. The control thing again:)

I look forward to the op...I just need to vent at the frustration of no date, and waiting, I guess.

Eliezer2
Posts: 56
Joined: Aug 2012

I am a Stage 4 RCC (clear cell) guy, age 61. I am also working at several jobs, and I am the only person in my whole place of work who can do 40 pushups; and I have mets in my lungs! I also agree that the emotional side is the toughest part of coping.

Here are some thoughts.

The first few weeks after discovering the problem are the toughest. Trust me, it then gets easier. The scariest part is the word "cancer." Then after a few weeks, you realize it is just a word. And you realize that there is life after contracting cancer.

Some tips:

As soon as you can, return to work or some other form of occupation and fill your time. Staring at the walls makes the disease a hundred times worse. Staying busy also takes your attention away from any physical discomforts you have.

Exercise, mildly. Keep your muscle tone good. Fitness not only improves your mood but may make your body better capable of coping.

I find it comforting to have my "affairs," including "financial affairs," in order. Then I have one less set of issues to worry about and can concentrate on other things. Do it NOT because you expect to drop dead any time soon but to feel more confident that this set of issues is under control and your dependents are cared for. Then get on with better things!

Cancer sucks, but there are so many other worse things in the world. I take comfort in remembering that I prefer cancer a hundred times over anything bad happening to my children. Maybe it is just me, but I find that remembering how many worse things there can be in life is strangely comforting. Consider helping out someone in worse condition or worse circumstances than youself! Trust me, there is no shortage.

Laugh. Joke. Especially about cancer. Laughter releases good hormones and helps you keep perspective. Watch funny movies.

Spill your guts, if not to friends or family then to your internet pen pals.

If you are so of a mind, pray. Converse with the Big Fella upstairs. It has been proven scientifically that it does not hurt.

Do things you get pleasure from doing, including all those things you never found time to do. Take banjo lessons, read all the plays of Shakespeare, learn line dancing, re-watch your favorite TV show from the 60s, take up pottery. How about that trip to Paris you always planned? Spend a few days and contemplate seriously what gives you pleasure, what you like doing, and then do those things.

If you sit around depressed and moping, you are letting the disease defeat you and you are losing part of the life you have been granted. Life for everyone is over all too soon so why waste the time one has on moping?

Remember that the science and technology are improving so rapidly that every week there are new developments and treatments and technology. You just need one of these to be right for you!

Start to write out your memories and memoirs. Write down anecdotes from your life, especially funny ones.

Take naps during the day.

I once saw an interview with "Mister T," you know - the giant boxer actor who played the character "BA" on the A Team show. He was describing his own battle with cancer (I think lymphoma). Watching that had an incredible effect on me. I sat there and said, Hey if this disease can even afflict Mister T, and he is battling it, then who the hell am I to give up??!!

Consider all the people who died during their teens, twenties and thirties and then consider the fact that you have been granted a long valuable life that is not over yet, one far exceeding what so many others were allowed by providence to enjoy. Instead of feeling sorry for yourself, feel sorry for them and celebrate the fact that you have out-lasted them. (I am not suggesting Schadenfreude but genuine gratitude.) Make a list of world famous people who did not last as long as you already have!

Hope some of that helps!

garym's picture
garym
Posts: 1651
Joined: Nov 2009

Hi Eliezer,

What a great attitude you have developed and shared, I am an instant fan. I too am 61, nearly 3 yrs post op and NED since, I whole heartedly agree with all you have said adding only that where cancer is concerned, "ATTACK WITH EXTREME PREJUDICE." May I ask what treatment options you are considering or undergoing for the lung mets? I would also like to suggest that you check into Gerald White's MAARS program as I believe it would suit you well. Your insight and approach would also be beneficial to the many newbies that show up here dazed by the whole "You have cancer" process so don't be afraid to hang around and share. Welcome to the club!

Rock on,

Gary

foxhd's picture
foxhd
Posts: 1873
Joined: Oct 2011

.....I don't know, Gary. Eliezer2 didn't say he rides a motorcycle....Do you think we can trust him?....Great attitude Eliezer2. You'll fit right in on this forum. Keep posting.
Fox.

garym's picture
garym
Posts: 1651
Joined: Nov 2009

If he doesn't, maybe we can convert him...

Eliezer2
Posts: 56
Joined: Aug 2012

Alas, no motorcycle. Got some great bathtub toys though!

I am on 50mg of Sutent, for about 16 months. Seems to be keeping the nasties in my lungs stable, at least for now. Lots and lots of side effects, as I assume you know about if you have chatted with Sutent takers.

Got too many things to concern myself with to sit around and worry what the future holds.

By the way, I think it is the duty of all cancer patients to make their doctors and the treatment staff laugh. Whenever I get an ECG, I always ask the (invariably young women) technicians if the machine can show if I am in love. It always seems to get them to laugh!

Texas_wedge's picture
Texas_wedge
Posts: 2807
Joined: Nov 2011

[With your name, you're bound to be a great source of help here!]

In your post above, you said:

"I think it is the duty of all cancer patients to make their doctors and the treatment staff laugh."

Unfortunately we don't always pull it off. After a second op for a recurrence, back in March, I posted this:

"I was last on the list yesterday. I managed to be absolutely deadpan when two nurses asked me how it was going after my op and I said "can you tell me when my op is scheduled to take place?" each replied triumphantly that it had already happened! Today one of them remarked how cogent I am today compared with yesterday when I hadn't known my op had already taken place; I had to explain that that had been an attempt at humour on my part!"

The boot was on the other foot at a pre-op session. I remarked that my BP was higher than I expected and the nurse remarked that it might be down to her. Unfortunately I was a bit slow on the uptake and hastily assured her that I was confident she was doing her job properly - only later did I realise how naive I'd been and how ungallant I must have appeared.

A little more successful in raising a smile was when I enjoined a lady member here, who was advocating being one's own advocate, that she didn't need to tell Fox to "stay on top of the nurses".

I hope you'll approve of the thread started by one of our lynchpins here and that you'll add to Gary's "Friday Funnies".

garym's picture
garym
Posts: 1651
Joined: Nov 2009

The iceman's picture included a couple interesting bath toys a while back, perhaps he could be persuaded to bring it back so you guys could compare.

When they wheeled me into the OR I asked them to double check that it was my left leg they were taking and not the right, they laughed and the anesthesiologist asked if somebody had started his job early. Laughing is the last thing I remember that day.

alice124's picture
alice124
Posts: 860
Joined: Mar 2012

Nice list! Let me ditto Gary's and Fox's comments/questions and welcome. We can never have too much optimism here and you sound like a strong dose. Glad you found us!

foxhd's picture
foxhd
Posts: 1873
Joined: Oct 2011

Jokes? Us? Talking about surgery, when I had had my embolization of my kidney prior to going in for the removal, I had 2 male OR techs or nurses. My arms are running IV's. Their hands are in gloves and are attempting to remain "clean." I was alert and in considerable pain. They could not give me anything more until I was put out. I am appearing in some distress. One of them introduces himself and says that he would shake my hand but he can't. I told him that was OK. In front of a half dozen people I said to him," Just come over here and give me a kiss." Embarrassed him pretty good. Minutes before what could have been the last minutes of my life, I'm busting some guys balls.

Texas_wedge's picture
Texas_wedge
Posts: 2807
Joined: Nov 2011

YOU could have died? I bet he could have died!! LOL

Eliezer2
Posts: 56
Joined: Aug 2012

When I came out of the anestesia after having my kidney and giblets extracted (by the way, that was 12.5 years ago), with the docs and nurses crowding about my wife runs over with alarm in her face until I say in front of everyone, "Not tonight dear I have a headache."

That was when she understood I had pulled through

Texas_wedge's picture
Texas_wedge
Posts: 2807
Joined: Nov 2011

You've passed the entry test here with flying colours!!

garym's picture
garym
Posts: 1651
Joined: Nov 2009

Five days after surgery when the doc came in with my pathology report and gave my wife and I the good news, she burst into tears. I turned to her calmly and said "Naa, naa, I told you so!", then I turned to the doc and told him she was hoping for bad news, the tension in the room disappeared instantly and we all had a good laugh.

Texas_wedge's picture
Texas_wedge
Posts: 2807
Joined: Nov 2011

In case you hadn't noticed Eliezer, we specialise in gallows humour here and Gary is a leading exponent.

Eliezer2
Posts: 56
Joined: Aug 2012

..

Eliezer2
Posts: 56
Joined: Aug 2012

This is not exactly cancer-related but I thought I would introduce y'all to Jewish humor.

A married man wants to "trick" his wife into having relations with him more often. So he recruits his MD friend. He asks his MD to tell his wife that her husband has contracted a rare disease and the only known cure for it is that she has to have relations with him twice a day. Otherwise he will die.

So he then brings his wife in for a consultancy with the MD and the doc takes the wife into the office and relays the "medical" news, that her husband will die if she does not have relations with him twice a day.

She comes out and the husband asks her, "Nu, so what did the doctor tell you?"

She replies, "He says you are going to die."

Texas_wedge's picture
Texas_wedge
Posts: 2807
Joined: Nov 2011

A good one but I think you may find a few of us here don't need an introduction to Jewish humour. However, it's the richest vein, so keep 'em coming.

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adman
Posts: 258
Joined: Jul 2012
dhs1963's picture
dhs1963
Posts: 368
Joined: May 2012

There is some indication that kidney cancer is more common in Ashkanazi Jews.

Texas_wedge's picture
Texas_wedge
Posts: 2807
Joined: Nov 2011

Do you have references? I know Afro-Americans are more prone to Papillary and Chromophobe claims a higher proportion of females than other sub-types do, but this is news! References please!

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garym
Posts: 1651
Joined: Nov 2009

Why do Jewish divorces cost so much?
They're worth it.

The Harvard School of Medicine did a study of why Jewish women like Chinese food so much. The study revealed that this is due to the fact that Won Ton spelled backward is Not Now.

There is a big controversy on the Jewish view of when life begins.
In Jewish tradition, the fetus is not considered viable until it graduates from medical school.

Q: Why don't Jewish mothers drink?
A: Alcohol interferes with their suffering.

Q: Why do Jewish mothers make great parole officers?
A: They never let anyone finish a sentence!

A man called his mother in Florida ,
"Mom, how are you?"
" Not too good," said the mother. "I've been very weak."
The son said, "Why are you so weak?"
She said, "Because I haven't eaten in 38 days."
The son said, "That's terrible. Why haven't you eaten in 38 days?"
The mother answered, "Because I didn't want my mouth to be filled with food if you should call."

A Jewish boy comes home from school and tells his mother he has a part in the play.
She asks, "What part is it?"
The boy says, "I play the part of the Jewish husband."
"The mother scowls and says, "Go back and tell the teacher you want a speaking part."

Q: How many Jewish mothers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: (Sigh) "Don't bother. I'll sit in the dark. I don't want to be a nuisance to anybody."

dhs1963's picture
dhs1963
Posts: 368
Joined: May 2012

This was about two months ago....I was terrified but decided that the proper way to handle it was to make all of the care givers laugh. For example, after they had labeled the back to show which side to cut on, a nurse (probably about my age, late 40's to early 50's) needed to check on the label. I said no you don't...you just want to see my butt. That caught her by surprise.

The last thing I remember saying before the surgery was no junior mints!

DMike's picture
DMike
Posts: 237
Joined: Nov 2011

Eliezer2,
I am amazed at the wonderful people I continue to meet/come in contact with because of cancer and this forum. Welcome!
--David

Bubbs21
Posts: 43
Joined: Jul 2012

The momentum on this thread the last few days has been fabulous. The ecletic mix of reserach, jokes and personal experiences riddled with laughter have been great therapy. Most appreciated. Wishing you all a laugh a day and great friendships.

Texas_wedge's picture
Texas_wedge
Posts: 2807
Joined: Nov 2011

Yes, it's a healthy mix and we do make some precious friendships!

Bubbs21
Posts: 43
Joined: Jul 2012

A brief recap:
- results of CT July 19 - 2 two cm tumours deemed likely RCC in lower left kidney
- Cipralex to help with anxiety
- partial lap, nephrectomy Nov 7th
- released from hospital Nov 9th
- post-op Dec 7th

I feel blessed to have found the tumours so early and to have had such an easy recovery. I have not used pain meds since leaving the hospital; no significant gas or bowel issues; drink lots of fluids; and walk. My only issue is regaining my endurance/energy and some brain fog.

The surgeon/oncologist provided me with the results of my path report yesterday:
- stage T1, grade 2 RCC
- no or limited margins, but confident he got it all
I have a CT booked for Feb and a follow-up appointment March 1st. If all goes well, semi-annual ultra sounds to follow.

This is better than winning the lottery. I just need to work at getting off the Cipralex2 now :). Anyone with experience with coming off cipralex or withdrawal?

foxhd's picture
foxhd
Posts: 1873
Joined: Oct 2011

....and you HAVE won the lottery!

DMike's picture
DMike
Posts: 237
Joined: Nov 2011

Great to hear you're doing so well after surgery. I see you're following Gary's 2 W's - walking and water - they'll both help with recovery. I hope everything continues to go well!
--David

icemantoo's picture
icemantoo
Posts: 1479
Joined: Jan 2010

Bubbs,

Sounds like you are on the way to a long life free of RCC. Beacause of your earlier BP issues it is even more important that the high BP be contained as high blood pressure along with age and missing a a kidney or part of one each negatively effect kidney function and low kidney function can effect your heart. You may want to get a referral to a nephrologist to address these issues in the long term.

Icemantoo

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