Apr 25, 2012 - 11:16 pm
I hoping that all the great RCC survivors on this board can offer me some help, advice or just a discussion board to cry on. :) I am a 39 yr. old wife, and a mother to three children (21, 14, 10). Back in February I went to the ER for a pain on my right side. I had the pain for about a week, but it would come and go, and then one day got really bad. So off to the ER I went, thinking my appendix had burst or something. ER doc did a CT scan and discovered a 4cm mass on my right kidney. This came as a complete shock. Anyways, I ended up having my right kidney removed on March 1, 2012. They removed the whole kidney because the tumor was right in the middle of the kidney. Pathology came back as RCC, but the margins were clear. I just saw my Oncologist last week and he said everything looks good, and that I should be just fine, recurrence is very low. This is all GREAT news! My problem is, why I am so emotional, and moody after this good news? And, I'm normally a very patient person, but my patience seems to have been removed along with my kidney! Sometimes, I just burst into tears, and I couldn't really tell you why. It has been a very stressful year for me, I lost my dad to lung cancer (almost a year to the day I had my kidney surgery), I started a new job,I quit smoking, I had my kidney removed, diagnosed with cancer, and my husband works out of state. I'm beginning to think the cancer diagnosis might be the straw that broke me! I have a great family/friend support system, yet I feel so alone. To everyone else, "I'm cured", and to me, I'm still trying to process that I even had cancer. I'm beyond grateful to be alive, but I don't think I ever got to express exactly how scared I was (and am) about having cancer.Everything happened so fast. Does that make sense? Am I crazy? I don't know if I should see a doctor and get some medication or if these feelings will pass on their own? I apologize for rambling. Thanks for listening and I appreciate any help.